h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Joined today. I am a number. I shall try to be a good number. An interesting number. A number to reckon with. A number to trust. They (the others) want me to be a nickname. They're always trying to get me to be a nickname. Every website I visit wants me to be a nickname. I blame the government. It's a plot. They want the whole country to have nicknames.
Well, I'll think about it. But I'm promising nothin'. I like my number. It's different. Unique. Like me.
I'm a number.

ever1's the same; were all unique.
dont say anything 2 loudly about the government or the moderators might get u! we know its a conspiricy but 4 goodness sake keep it down or they might cart u off never 2 b seen again.
its not like the government rules the country nyway teh civil servents do that and every1 knows they dont listen 2 ny1.

(Low whisper) Thanks for tip. How long have you been in?

time is an illusion lunchtime doubly so.

that means i dont know. i never do know the date. i don't believe in controling time. time controls itself if humans set about understsnding it then trains would never be l8 but all we ever do is try and control it...

...and then blame the government 4 the trains. still thats what the government r there 4 - being blamed 4 everything.

i've been around 4 as long as i can remember and seeing that i have the memory of a goldfish (3secs) thats not very long