h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Got passed a deeply-touching chain letter today and felt I should
share the guilt trip:

> Please look deep in your heart to find a way to help
> this young boy.
>
> --------
> My name is Billy Evans. I am a very sick little boy.
> My mother is typing this for me, because I can't.
> She is crying. The reason she is so sad is
> because I'm so sick.
>
> I was born with just a head, no body. It doesn't
> hurt, except when I try to breathe. The doctors
> gave me an artificial body. It is a burlap bag filled
> with leaves. The doctors said that was the best
> they could do on account of us having no money
> or insurance. I would like to have a body transplant,
> but we need more money. Mommy doesn't work
> because she said nobody hires crying people.
> I said, "Don't cry, Mommy," and she hugged my
> burlap bag. Mommy always gives me hugs, even
> though she's allergic to burlap and it makes her
> sneeze and chafes her real bad.
>
> I hope you will help me. You can help me if you
> forward this email to everyone you know. Forward
> it to people you don't know, too. Dr. Johansen
> said that for every person you forward this email
> to, Bill Gates will team up with Disney World and
> send a nickel to NASA. With that funding, NASA
> will collect prayers from school children all over
> America and have the astronauts take them up
> into space so that the angels can hear them better.
> Then they will come back to earth and go to the
> Pope, and he will take up a collection in church
> and send all the money to the doctors. The doctors
> could help me get better then.
>
> Maybe one day I will be able to play baseball.
> Right now I can only be third base. Every time you
> forward this letter, the astronauts can take more
> prayers to the angels and my dream will be closer
> to coming true. Please help me. Mommy is so sad,
> and I want a body. I don't want my leaves
> to rot before I turn 10.
>
> If you don't forward this email, that's okay. Mommy
> says you're a mean and heartless b*****d who doesn't
> care about a poor little boy with only a head. She says
> that if you don't stew in the raw pit of your own
> guilt-ridden stomach, she hopes you die a long slow
> horrible death and then burn forever in hell. What kind
> of cruel person are you that you can't take five freakin'
> minutes to forward this to all your friends so that they can
> feel guilt and shame about ignoring a poor, bodiless
> nine-year-old boy?
>
> Please help me. I try to be happy, but it's hard. I wish
> I had a kitty. I wish I could hold a kitty. I wish I could
> hold a kitty that wouldn't chew on me and try to bury its
> turds in the leaves of my burlap body. I wish that very much.
>
> Thank You,
> Billy Evans