h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I just read your 'rant' at Lil's - which you know was a perfectly normal reaction to a very frustrating and upsetting situation.

Yes, I know that none of us can know the full story nor the hurt that you, your daughter and your son-in-law are going through. But, if we push the in-laws out of the picture for a minute (hard as it may be to do so), what we have is two very loving parents doing their best in a situation that neither of them ever expected to go through and, more importantly, a child who knows that he is loved by the greatest mummy, daddy and grandmother in the world.

You also have a daughter who must be a wonderful person to have made such friends that have proved their love and friendship and who is also proud and secure with such support and the knowledge that her own parents are also loving, generous people.

The in-laws really should be treated as objects of pity: how terrible the spaces inside their heads and hearts must be! And if they end up lonely, miserable and alone because of this whole situation it will be sad but, after all, you owe them nothing so you can gradually just dismiss them from your worries. Whatever befalls them will be of their own doing. As it is for all of us.

I know its always easy for outsiders to say such things but concentrate on all the positives that the rest of you are discovering. You are all so very blessed. Other peoples' negativity can never impinge upon that.

Hi simsonromany - and wellcome to my 'Personal Space'.

And thank you for cheering me up and pointing out the good things to be happy for.

>>but concentrate on all the positives that the rest of you are discovering. You are all so very blessed. Other peoples' negativity can never impinge upon that<<

This is usually how I choose to live, and I'm usually very understanding, trying to find explanations and ways to excuse people who hurt me (or others). But sometimes I just want to kick or shout - to tilt people out of their not very fruitful routines and ways of life.

I think it is a pity that the in-laws are tripping themselves when, with a bit of graciousness, everybody could have come out of a difficul emotional time with less tears and more warmth.

And I think it is a pity that the in-laws for a long time will have lukewarm response from their son and my daughter - and not the happy grandparents' bit - allthough they will be seeing their grandson as much as before at their place - but alas not at all family gatherings.

tartaronne