Journal Entries
limbo
Posted Mar 1, 2003
i'm bored, you know?
here it is shortly after 9 at night. i have nothing to do til midnight and i know i'm not going to get any sleep since my flight is at 4.15 and i'm insisting on going to a screening of A Clockwork Orange which will last til at least 2 by my reckoning... i've done some semblance of homework to clear the way for optimum vacation-enjoyment... i've packed haphazardly as is my fashion... and so you find me here. i don't trust myself to go to sleep and not sleep all night, hence missing the movie which i've been looking forward to all day like the silly person with nothing to do that i am, and i'm not tired anyway.
ok here we go, a list of productive things i could do. keeping in mind that i can only be making this list in order to avoid doing any of the things on it:
1.read biography of lord alfred douglas
2.finish writing my self-indulgent, sophomoric, solipsistic novel
3.do my reading for american literature which i have so far reserved for the plane ride and/or the rest of the vacation
4.do my french assignment which i also reserved for the break since dad can help me and in that case it would be quality time
5.carry the empty bottles on my desk to the recycling bin and contemplate whether the fossil fuels used in recycling processes negate the potential benefit and/or the positive effects upon my conscience
6.risk taking a nap
7.make tea, particularly ineffectual throat comfort tea for my stupid cold
8.go fetch some institutional toilet paper from the front desk in response to earlier chewing-out from suitemate about how she's the only one who ever gets toilet paper or washes the bath mats
9.come on...there's got to be something... oh hell. you see how tedious the things i have to think about are?
so anyway, disregarding list and continuing to ramble, i'm going home tomorrow! yay! apparently the living room will be repainted several shades lighter than my current residual image of it, and there will be some repairs going on in the basement. i anticipate no problems in adjusting.
i've been getting deja vu somewhat frequently lately. yes, marked deja vu.
rabbit in the moon are playing in town tomorrow night, i won't be going as i'll be in nebraska where nothing is happening but life.
i got my sigur ros ticket today. i love ticketmaster's automated order system.
limbo! remember The Tick? his battle cry was 'Spoon!' there's a drawing of him in my personal notebook.
i am getting a free Tweaker sticker in the mail.
ok, enough randomness, i really must acknowledge my responsibilities as a sane human being: let there be a point to your actions or let it be naptime.
Discuss this Journal entry [1]
Latest reply: Mar 1, 2003
alright boys, let's go to war; JB's truck needs gas!
Posted Feb 28, 2003
last night i (what a concept) DROVE myself and a friend into the french quarter to see interpol. i paid $9 for parking which is f*cked up but hey, my parents are paying and they'll pay a lot for my safety and that of my truck. this exorbitant lot was about 2 blocks from the House of Blues. and about 10 minutes ago the gears finally started turning. i can go to Sigur Ros march 29th by myself without having to face the creeping paranoia of walking alone downtown after dark (even though i've done it before and in all probability not a damn thing would ever happen to me)! nothing to hold me back. i'm TOTALLY seeing Sigur Ros! even if none of my friends will go!
i mean, for a person as repressed as i, who is happy to be alone pretty much of the time, let me tell you, this is a liberating factor.
Discuss this Journal entry [1]
Latest reply: Feb 28, 2003
damn social phobia
Posted Jan 18, 2003
smelling fajita-smells wafting over from the next room. they smell good but nah, don't want a taste badly enough to go over and speak to someone, even if they did rinse their cilantro in my sink.
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Latest reply: Jan 18, 2003
night falls on j.b.
Posted Jan 9, 2003
i left my heart in distracted hands and after dark
with no sun to illuminate anything else
my thoughts of you hold sway
Discuss this Journal entry [1]
Latest reply: Jan 9, 2003
grumble.
Posted Jan 7, 2003
well, i'm f**kin' well back.
funny how my mood darkens when the sun goes down. i'm just realizing that i really have nothing to do. tomorrow at least classes will start. back to trying not to hate my life, one day at a time.
well, let's see. what do i want from life? what would i prefer anyway? what would be good enough that i wouldn't whine and be depressed all the time?
stuff i want and don't have that may actually be worth having:
item 1: a house or other living space with more than 1 room
item 2: a cat
item 3: funny people to hang out and watch t.v. with in the evening
item 4: a kitchen and someone who knows how to cook
item 5: true love
item 6: no homework and never having to do research, ever
item 7: a job i don't hate that doesn't take up all my time or leave me in poverty
and/or
item 8: successful writing career
item 9: occasional rock shows
Discuss this Journal entry [21]
Latest reply: Jan 7, 2003
Jane Bane
Researcher U185448
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