h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Oh gawd! Yuk! That's awful. Just terrible. Worst poetry I've ever read. Probably beats wassername's - Nancy Millstone Jennings was it? Anyway, I'm glad I don't have to listen to it being read out loud or I'd have to gnaw my leg off to take my mind off it.

Other than that though, it's pretty good

Yeah, thanks Salamander. I must say I'm quietly confident, nay quietly proud of it myself, n jus' waitin' for a passing publisher to put me among the immortals. D'you think I should carry on? (I'm sure that, bein' a bein' of taste an' recognising my gifts you'll say yes). Would you like one dedicated to you, to make you famous?

Have a cup of tea for being so supportive an' recognising Real Talent when you see it. ...


H.

An' I see you live in Leicestershire. Not too far away from me. I could come round a read you a few poems one day if you like....

Why do I keep hitting the post button instead of the rev

Have mercy on a poor old amphibian! Even though I can regrow a limb I've had to chomp off, it takes a while and I'll be gimpy for weeks after a recitation of your fabulously dreadful poetry.

Yes. Go on writing. The world deserves your poetry. That'll teach it!

You should go and visit this researcher's page: http://www.bbc.co.uk/h2g2/guide/U170471 and ask her to review your poems. Have a look at her journal (there's only the one). She obviously has some insight into the value of serious poetry.

I'd be deeply honoured if you dedicated one of your poems to me. Of course I would! 8) Will it be about salamanders that are mugwumps?

Regarding your selection of buttons, I can only guess that there are simply too many to choose from and you have to hope that none of the buttons is set up with a self-destruct function

STM:

You're too kind

But I suppose you're right, I should go on writing, the world needs me But it isn't easy being gifted like this - it's a great responsibility to be an artist in any field. Genius is a cross some of us have to bear, I guess, for the sake of humanity.

Do be careful not to hurt your leg out of pure admiration. I'm tempted to do that myself sometimes

Since you're such a sincere admirer of my work, I'll immortalise you in an ode next time the Inspiration comes upon me an' you'll gain immortality through my words Watch this space!


Hullaballoo (Poet and Tragedian)

What a charmer you are and sooooo modest!

I'll follow your advice and be careful with my leg. It does seem to develop a bit of a nervous twitch whenever I'm all eaten up with admiration for unbelievably far-out poetry. I wonder why

The depth of my pleasure will know no bounds if you immortalise me in verse. I'm watching this space!

Hi Sal,

Sorry, the 'watch this space' was misleading. Genius has its faults, after all. Your poem's already there - in my journal space. I must say I'm modestly very proud of it... Don't be too hard on your leg!


Hullabaloo, Poet and Tragedian

My very dear Hullabaloo!

I hardly know what to say. Frabjous! I'm beside myself with pride and happiness. Have a look on my page where I've added your beautiful-beyond-compare poem. Is that ok? Am I allowed to so that? Would you like me to change it any way? What do you think. Is it ok?

Thank you so very very much. You are a true genius!

Sal

Honoured Lady,

It is my privilege to have been of service to you, and I'm overjoyed to see my modest ode to your beauty on your Home Page

Just think - as computers progress, it won't be long before I can read it (and a selection of my works) to you over the net in person! Wouldn't that be wonderful? (and I've got a wonderful voice which only jealous people - lots of them - say 'drones on')

Your 'umble servant,

Hullabaloo (Poet and Tragedian)

Hi Sal,


How ya doin'?

Thanx for Frabjous from Jabberwocky - I've now used on me home page


Hull

Hiya Hull

I'm surviving adequately thank you. "Frabjous" is such a useful word, don't you think?

Don't hold your breath waiting for my computer to progress - it barely a step beyond clockwork. Shame ah?

I've just noticed the poetry on the page of my friend Wumbeevil. I think it's almost umm, ur, bad ... I mean good enough to qualify as Vogon. Brace yourself and go and have a look:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/h2g2/guide/U37312

Your fan,
Sal

My only fan, obviously. Such a pity that others aren't as aesthetic and sensitive as you are

Hull

Wot? No fan club?

How about starting a new page (ie register another home page) and call it the "Hullabaloo Fan Club". Put a link to it on your page, your muse might put a link to it on her page. I might put a link to it on my page. Do a bit of "spamming" (perish the thought ). You might get some fans, besides me. Just a thought.

Sal

Hi Sal

Thanx for the suggestion, but even I haven't enough ego to start my own fan club.

You, as my fan, could do it though


Graciously,

Hull

Hi Sal,

You seem to spend a lot of time in RL. What's it like out there? (Or are you winding up your computer?).

Would you mind if the Post included the poem dedicated to you? It was going in this week, but I thought I should ask you first.

I'm very serious about the fan club, btw. As my one and only fan, I think you have a duty.

Graciously,

Hullabalo, Poet and Tragedian

Sorry Hull. Didn't mean to neglect you. I'd decided to h2g2 just at weekends because I'm a bit vertically challenged, so to speak - bit of a back prob. So, the less said about RL, the better

Yes of course you must tell the Post to go ahead and let the world enjoy the bliss of your poem. How astute of the Post to spot your talent so quickly!

I'd be happy to do a Hullabaloo Fan Club page. How insensitive of me to think that a modest genius such as yourself might consider starting your own fan club . Do you have any particular preference for content?

You and your staff will need to process most of the applications for membership and field other enquiries I'm afraid because, as I mentioned, I can't log on as often as I'd like.

Sal

Thanks Sal. Can't be much fun being condemned to RL, especially with a bad back.

I didn't mean that you should 'manage' the FC, we'll look after that, though you might possibly be the only member! All I ask is that you start it off and do some spamming based on the people who've appeared on my Home Page (all I ask?). No particular content, except how 'touched' (by genius of course) I am and how brilliant my Vogon Poetry is.

With my gracious thanks<


Hull

Ok then Hull. I'll plan to start the page in the coming week and report back next weekend.

Sal

Thanks Sal


Hull.