This is the Message Centre for Otto Fisch ("Stop analysing Strava.... and cut your hedge")
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a bad joke
Uncle Heavy [sic] Started conversation Aug 28, 2003
what do you call a man with jelly in one ear and custard in the other?
a triffle deaf
a bad joke
Otto Fisch ("Stop analysing Strava.... and cut your hedge") Posted Aug 28, 2003
Yay! Bad jokes!
Skeleton walks into a bar and says
"Pint of beer and a mop, please"
a bad joke
Uncle Heavy [sic] Posted Aug 28, 2003
a ghost floats into a bar
barman says 'sorry we dont serve spirits here'
a bad joke
Otto Fisch ("Stop analysing Strava.... and cut your hedge") Posted Aug 28, 2003
Boooo!
What's brown and has hazlenuts in every bite?
Squirrel poo.
a bad joke
Otto Fisch ("Stop analysing Strava.... and cut your hedge") Posted Sep 1, 2003
booooo again!
Shakespeare walks into a bar and the landlord says:
"Get out! You're barred!"
Perhaps that only works when said out loud....
a bad joke
Uncle Heavy [sic] Posted Sep 1, 2003
a woman walks into a bar and asks for a double entendre, so the barman gives her one
a bad joke
Otto Fisch ("Stop analysing Strava.... and cut your hedge") Posted Sep 2, 2003
"Knock knock!"
"Who's there?"
"Interrupting Cow"
"Interupting C-"
"Mooooooooooo!"
a bad joke
Uncle Heavy [sic] Posted Sep 2, 2003
a grubby one, im afraid...
how do you stop a dog from humping your leg?
pick it up and suck its cock...
a bad joke
Otto Fisch ("Stop analysing Strava.... and cut your hedge") Posted Sep 7, 2003
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Fsssshhhhh
a bad joke
Felonious Monk - h2g2s very own Bogeyman Posted Oct 16, 2003
Two television aerials decide to get married. Come the big day, the ceremony is a complete cock-up: the bride arrives late, the best man forgets his lines, some kid throws up in church.
Mind you, the reception was brilliant!
a bad joke
Otto Fisch ("Stop analysing Strava.... and cut your hedge") Posted Oct 16, 2003
Did you hear that Craig David has been chosen for the UK archery team for the next olympics?
He's the bow selector.....
a bad joke
Uncle Heavy [sic] Posted Oct 16, 2003
why does edward woodwood have 4 ds in his name?
cos otherwise hed be called ewar woowoo
a bad joke
Otto Fisch ("Stop analysing Strava.... and cut your hedge") Posted Oct 21, 2003
Not sure about this one yet....
"I caught a bus the other day. So I got myself immunised against bus disease"
a bad joke
Snailrind Posted Nov 27, 2003
What's got twelve legs, four tails, and one eye?
Three blind mice and half a kipper.
a bad joke
Otto Fisch ("Stop analysing Strava.... and cut your hedge") Posted Nov 28, 2003
Hurrayyy!!!
Bloke rushes into a doctor's surgery, pushes past the receptionist and rushes in to see the doctor.
"Doctor, Doctor! I've just drunk a near-irreversible incredibly fast-acting shrinking potion! Help me!"
The doctor replies:
"I'm afraid that you're just going to have to be a little patient"
a bad joke
Snailrind Posted Nov 28, 2003
Doctor: well, Sir, I've got some bad news and some good news. The bad news is that you have just twelve hours to live.
Patient: oh my god! That's terrible! What's the good news? Tell me, tell me!
Doctor: the good news is that my receptionist just agreed to go to bed with me. Woo-hoo! 
a bad joke
Felonious Monk - h2g2s very own Bogeyman Posted Dec 3, 2003
Doctor: "I have some bad news and good news."
Man: "Give the the bad news first."
Doctor: "We took off the wrong leg."
Man: "What's the good news?"
Doctor: "You don't have to have your leg off."
Key: Complain about this post
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a bad joke
- 1: Uncle Heavy [sic] (Aug 28, 2003)
- 2: Otto Fisch ("Stop analysing Strava.... and cut your hedge") (Aug 28, 2003)
- 3: Uncle Heavy [sic] (Aug 28, 2003)
- 4: Otto Fisch ("Stop analysing Strava.... and cut your hedge") (Aug 28, 2003)
- 5: Uncle Heavy [sic] (Aug 28, 2003)
- 6: Otto Fisch ("Stop analysing Strava.... and cut your hedge") (Sep 1, 2003)
- 7: Uncle Heavy [sic] (Sep 1, 2003)
- 8: Otto Fisch ("Stop analysing Strava.... and cut your hedge") (Sep 2, 2003)
- 9: Uncle Heavy [sic] (Sep 2, 2003)
- 10: Uncle Heavy [sic] (Sep 2, 2003)
- 11: Otto Fisch ("Stop analysing Strava.... and cut your hedge") (Sep 7, 2003)
- 12: Felonious Monk - h2g2s very own Bogeyman (Oct 16, 2003)
- 13: Otto Fisch ("Stop analysing Strava.... and cut your hedge") (Oct 16, 2003)
- 14: Uncle Heavy [sic] (Oct 16, 2003)
- 15: Otto Fisch ("Stop analysing Strava.... and cut your hedge") (Oct 21, 2003)
- 16: Snailrind (Nov 27, 2003)
- 17: Otto Fisch ("Stop analysing Strava.... and cut your hedge") (Nov 28, 2003)
- 18: Snailrind (Nov 28, 2003)
- 19: Zed (Dec 3, 2003)
- 20: Felonious Monk - h2g2s very own Bogeyman (Dec 3, 2003)
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