Journal Entries
Truth
Posted Apr 20, 2001
i used to work for a company, which helped people overcome grief due to the loss of a loved one. this is a story that i wrote when i was in pain. i was scared of death. not because of the physical pain, but because i thought i would lose every body in my life. The Wave happened about a week later.
LITTLE BIRDIE
'No Little Birdie, you can't fly now. Your time will come. Wait until your wings grow strong.'
'How do you know that, Mama Birdie? How do you know that my wings are not strong? I own these wings after all.'
Mama Birdie's eyes looked far away and said, 'cause I am still with you. When your wings grow strong I won't be there with you.'
Little Birdie looked confused. He sat quietly for sometime trying to understand what his mother had told him, before falling asleep.
Mama Birdie lovingly covered her son with her wings and sighed. She knew her son would grow to be a beautiful sparrow; and a wise one . He was very curious about his world and was very eager to explore it.
Mama Birdie was already a wise soul. She could see what other birds could not - the purpose of her life.
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It was morning.
'Wake up, sleepy head. Its a brand new day. Time for your lessons'. Little Birdie woke up feeling cold; snuggled closer to Mama Birdie and started to go back to sleep. Mama Birdie smiled, spread her wings and allowed Fair Breeze to caress Little Birdie. As Mama Birdie flapped her wings and flew away from the nest, Fair Breeze started massaging Little Birdie with her nimble fingers.
Little Birdie felt the cold bite into her almost featherless skin. Strangely, as Fair Breeze continued her massage, he started feeling warm. He had always been scared of Fair Breeze (he never tried to know why); and so he always kept his eyes shut when she was around. But today he felt differently. He opened his eyes and looked at her. She had the same expression that his mother always had; full of love and joy.
An irresistible urge made him ask, 'You never speak to me. Yet Mama Birdie tells me you are my teacher. I don't see how you teach me.'
'I speak to your soul. My cold fingers stimulate the growth of feathers that will help you learn better from my brothers and cousins who you might meet some time in the future. They have their own ways of teaching. And unlike me they will test you to see how well you learnt.' Little Birdie did not understand the words. He let the words rest in his young mind and allowed the now warm breeze reach his soul. He closed his eyes. He was happy; but did not know why. He felt different fingers working on him now. He opened his eyes to find that Fair Breeze had left and Bright Sun had taken her place. Little Birdie smiled at Bright Sun.
Bright Sun, a red ball of fire was rising slowly from his position. Little Birdie felt strength growing in his little wings.
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Mama Birdie returned with food. Little Birdie finished his food and said, 'Mama Birdie, I shall soon fly and then, I, shall get food for you. You can rest.' His mother looked at him and said, 'I can find food for myself. I have been given the strength. The day you fly you'll want to do many other things.'
'Oh yes, I want to see the world. But I shall get food for you first', and with a hint of sadness he asked, 'Why do you always keep talking of leaving? I don't like the idea at all.'
'Then learn to like it son, because the idea shall take form sooner or later.'
'How can I like something that I don't like Mama Birdie?'
'Ignorance, son, makes us believe whatever we know as the truth. What you like now, may become what you don't like, after you learn. Nothing is stagnant in our universe. Everything changes constantly. We are here today, now; we'll be else where tomorrow.'
'But Mama Birdie, why can't we be together all the time? We can change together, can't we?'
'We are changing together son. I am here with you now, because I have to teach you. And as I teach you, I learn. The day I finish teaching you all that you have to know, and learn all that I have to from you, I shall move to a different level of my education. If that level is with you, we'll stay together; if it is elsewhere, I shall go there. Remember son, we never get separated from the ones we love. True families always stay together, in one form or another.'
Little Birdie was silent for sometime before he looked into his mother's eyes and asked, 'Where will it all end Mama Birdie? Will there be a time when we will know everything and stay together with our families? Always?'
Mama Birdie did not have an answer. 'I don't know Little Birdie. I really don't.'
'Is there somebody who knows Mama Birdie?'
'Yes there is. He is everywhere at once. He is a member of every family and he is somebody who shall never leave his family.'
Little Birdie was quiet. He was tired. Soon he fell asleep.
Mama Birdie looked at her son. His questions delighted her. He was already moving on his own.
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Mama Birdie had gone out. Little Birdie was spending time by exchanging words with Dotty Birdie, his cute little friend who lived on the fourth branch from his. They spoke about their games with Bright Sun and Fair Breeze. Bright Sun, he told her, tried everyday to show them the ways of the universe. He was a different being every moment of the day. He changed his color, position, size, and his intensity just to show that their universe was in constant change. Bright Sun also gave him hope, he said thoughtfully, that there will be new beginning for every end.
'My, my, you have started speaking like Wise Ol' Birdie, who lives on the branch below mine.'
'Oh no, I am young. Look, my tail is just growing. And I have yet to learn how to fly.'
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Way across the cluster of trees in the forest Mama Birdie was picking food for her son. She picked all the food she could in her beak and took off. She could see her nest in the distant trees. As she neared her dwelling she saw Little Birdie energetically fluttering his wings and rising into the air for an instant before falling back into the nest. He was striving continuously she thought.
'Look Mama Birdie, I can fly,' he said as she settled onto their nest. She watched him with pride before starting to feed him.
'I am really happy. But see that you land in the nest. You might hurt yourself if you land anywhere else.' Little Birdie understood.
In the next few days Mama Birdie taught her son the techniques of flight. He learnt everything so diligently that she knew he would soon fly better and faster than her. She taught him to find food. As days went by, he started exploring new places and took his mother and their friends to places which had more delicious food.
His friends came to him to be inspired to do better. 'It is we who define our destinies, and it is we who see them come to life. You are the masters of your lives', he always told them.
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Its a fine morning, he thought as he flew across the forest. He played in the cool water of a stream for sometime. He was so involved in his play that he didn't notice dark clouds forming in the sky.
A few minutes later he felt the sting of rain drops on his body. He had learnt enough to know that the day now belonged to Cold Storm. He thought of Mama Birdie. She had been regularly reminding him that the time of their separation was very close. He was scared for a moment. He was far away from home.
He could take shelter on one of the trees here, but he wanted to be with his mother. Something told him that the time was near. He took off and flew for sometime before resting on a branch for sometime. He continued his journey with short breaks. He was finally very close to his house. He was resting on a tall tree. He felt a strange kind of bond with the tree. The tension that he had built during his journey dissipated without a trace. 'Nice tree, I must build my nest here', he thought.
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Mama Birdie knew it was 'the day'. She could feel that her son was close by. She looked in the direction he had taken in the morning. Tall trees were all she could see through the curtain of rain.
Cold Storm thundered. He enjoyed his occasional visits to this place.
Mama Birdie was still watching in the direction her son had taken. There was a sudden flash and she saw lightning strike one of the tall trees beyond.
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Mama Birdie found his body, partly charred lying on the wet ground. Sadness gripped her heart. She looked into the sky and asked, 'When will I see him again?'
A gentle voice replied, 'Look inside, you'll find him. Always.'
Discuss this Journal entry [5]
Latest reply: Apr 20, 2001
A Short Story
Posted Apr 11, 2001
this is a story i rewrote. this should let you know more about me.
The Wave
Wind blew over the immense ocean giving birth to tiny ripples. Each ripple would soon grow into a wave. And each wave would contribute to the growth of every wave surrounding it. Among these ripples was Tiny Ripple; named that way for obvious reasons.
Tiny Ripple loved life. And with life he flowed. His innocent movements were not without flaw. He got stuck several times, unable to move forward; sometimes because his larger neighbors crossed his path; sometimes because he was feeling lazy and did not want to move. But he soon realized that movement was his nature and going against it would only kill him. And Tiny Ripple did not want to die.
So he learnt to overcome his flaws. He learnt never to be lazy; he learnt never to let others stop him from growing. As he overcame his flaws, he grew in size and strength. Tiny Ripple was now called Big Wave.
One day Big Wave noticed that he was unknowingly restricting the movement of smaller waves. His realization taught him to be compassionate. His compassion made him to carry the smaller waves along with him. And as he did so, he grew in size, strength and speed.
They say you find true happiness when you work towards your destiny. Big Wave was now in harmony with his destiny. He was happy and he shared his happiness with his friends and neighbors. He grew more.
One day in his joy he jumped high. And when he did that, he saw the shore in a distance. He fell. He understood that when he reached the shore, he would die. He had always thought that movement was what kept him alive. Now he saw that if he moved, he would die. Depressed, he slowed down. He became gloomy. As he grew sad, he grew weak. As he grew weak, his friends got separated from him. For they moved at the same rate as before and he had slowed down.
Wind who had caused his birth and had seen his rise was concerned. He spoke to Weak Wave who had been Big Wave.
'What is the matter with you? Why have you stopped moving?'
'Can't you see, I am a wave and the shore is close. When I reach it I'll be dead. I'll be nothing.', he said with a sad note in his voice.
Wind could not help laughing. 'Silly fellow. You think you are a wave?'
Weak Wave was surprised. 'What do you mean?', he asked.
'Wake up boy', Wind said, 'you are not a wave. You are the Ocean.'
As realization dawned on him Weak Wave started laughing. He laughed as he never did before. He thanked Wind as he started gaining speed. But this time he did not become Big Wave. He now was the Ocean.
Discuss this Journal entry [8]
Latest reply: Apr 11, 2001
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