h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I may be a lexicographer by trade, but you have me there. Scholastic I am aware of; Stomachic too.
Put me out of my misery and define yourself! My big dictionary is in the other room.

Um, okay. Strictly speaking, "stochastic process" is a form of statistical analysis involving conjecture based on available data filtered through previous trends.

Loosely speaking, people are said to be "stochastic" when they use this process in their daily lives. Charlie Brown is at the low end of the stochastic-ability scale: even after fifty years, Lucy still pulls the football away when he runs up to kick it. Most people have some stochastic ability, especially when they are told a predictable joke or have relatives over. You just know Uncle Joe is going to get drunk and try to fondle the cat, because he has done it every Thanksgiving before.

At the upper end of the scale, stochastic ability almost gives the appearance of precognition, when what it actually is is your brain calculating possibilities subconsciously and arriving at a conclusion without telling your conscious mind what's going on. You know what a friend is going to say before they even say it, for instance.

I got the tag hung on me a few years back, for some very boring reasons.

There is also a printing process which uses stochastic screening - instead of the usual regular pattern of differing sized dots (see any newspaper) with stochastic screening the image is made up of seemingly random marks. Better quality by all accounts, but its never really taken off.

I had never heard of that one. Wild.

There is a character (deceased) by your name in the comic book limited series called 'Top Ten'.

Do you know Alan Moore?