h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I really hope that you are on holiday!

Otherwise, there seems to be no excuse as to why the limerick thread has gone abysmally downhill over the last four days!!! (I know, I know, one shouldn't use three apostrophes together) However, as the 'main man' you really should be there to keep the 'Flying Ostrich' in check - I'm no match for you; although I do try in your absence (which I trust is temporary).

**** into gear again please Pedantic.

I have been on holiday (we had yet another one here) but also bought a new Mac with an English keyboard and all the latest. Unfortunately that meant completely reconfigurating everything and my ADSL refused to work. The holiday meant that I couldn't get hold of Tariq-the-Tech to tell me where I was being stupid. I have also to teach my fingers to hit different buttons - it has taken 5 years to get used to a Froggie keyboard.
I will endeavour to get back to the limericks.