h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Finally, I realise who I am and what I'm here to do.

I'm not interested in teaching philosophy, OK? I don't want a name here. I don't give a shet about this world's fame and so on.

I have endured appalling suffering all my life. The only thing that kept me going was love for Jesus. And now, Jesus tells me to fill me boots.

Most of my work, I do spiritually, undercover. I don't have any friends to speak of. I'm a social outcast. And I've got a protector. He will save me from Kissinger's hitmen.

Had a programmer come round today. Told him to get lost.

The things Jesus can do! These bestards won't know what's hit them.

We're subverting evil from within, using its own power against it, Kung Fu style.

I've already started work on Kissinger's organisation. Messing it up from within. Giving orders to key people to do little subtle things no-one will notice, that will make the whole rotten organisation implode.

let's all enjoy the spectacle of God finally having his revenge against all those bustards who kill and abuse and oppress innocent children. What drives me personally, is love for God, and the desire to avenge all those poor innocents who lost their lives at the hands of evil in this world.

Wow, Pet, I'd never have thought you'd agree with me! But it's so obvious isn't it. Its victims are terrorised into obedience.

Basically it's a Satanic power cult that brainwashes its victims using their fear of death to intimidate them into the power of their "priests".

The Bible teaches clearly that every Jesus people is a priest. Old Poap had an apoplexy when Luther taught that. He couldn't stand it. All those years they'd been hiding behind the devil's skirts, teaching lies, abusing satanic power, sucking the life out of the people, blaspheming the Name of the Most High, and here was someone brave enough to face up to their simpering old men in drag and tell the truth to their faces.

Fearless. That's my Martin.

Once you know Jesus, and are sure of what you're doing, and do it right, and have the promise of his protection, Satan's threats just don't matter any more. He's threatening me, now, for writing this. Do I care? Does it look like I care?