h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Got to be very careful at the moment. Things don't come cheap.

Thinking of going to Claremont, if they're open.

I hear voices wherever I go. In shops, in taxis, even in my Den. They are trying to ... well I know what they are doing but it's impossible what they are saying. I wish the Doc had let me go to a shrink instead of trying to take me on himself when he isn't really up to it. And the "drugs counsellor" was pathetic. It's tiring me out, it really is. I'm sick of this life. It's just empty. Yes I know that was my choice, way back when. Greater love has no man. But I'm 45 now and really, ready to go home. This planet is just hell.

The voices are at it again. God refuses to allow me a girlfriend - Christian, of course, I've had it with Gentiles - and I have to struggle on alone. Indifference, complacency, even contempt, that's what people give you because of Jesus. I've long since given up hoping my music will ever be published, but my writing, no, I'm not going to give up trying to get that out there. Satan puts up countless obstacles though. But Jesus has overcome the world. So if he wants my work to succeed, it will. Otherwise, it won't. The thing is, I'm confident of its quality, and I can't just stop writing. I asked Helga to commission me three pieces a week for her website, and she just ignored me. "Keep away from me, for I am too holy for you". Such an attitude is deeply disrespectful. God says it's like smoke in his nostrils. I made the mistake of judging by appearances and once thought she was a woman of faith. But when her faith was tested, she was nowhere. The fact that she got the sack, is a sure sign that my Father agrees with me that she was very, very wrong to sack me. I told her not to mess with me on many occasions. So being a woman, she did what I asked her not to. She sowed the wind and reaped the whirlwind. (Someone said I was like a whirlwind in the Spirit.) She's dealing with me by ignoring me now. I came to my own and my own received me not. Although Helga did give me my first break, for which I shall always remain grateful, she took the work away on a whim. I never got over the anger at being treated unjustly by someone who publicly represents God.

Still, she's still the dedicatee, and I've lost her postal address so I'll have to leave her a copy at CCFM behind the desk, along with one for Sean and one for Barry.

I need to send bunny from ML a copy. Also Anne-Marie and Vaughan. My accountant, and my brother, and Elsje. One for the Indian chappie in the geek shop. One for Theo perhaps. Perhaps one for Mrs Mot but as she declared me persona non grata then I don't think my book would be grata either. One for my Dad and his wife. One for David my brother. One for John Swinton and one for Simon Gathercole, seeing as they reviewed it and produced positive blurbs. One for Peet's nurse.

That's 15 so far. I think I'm going to need about 20 copies to dispose at my leisure. And of course, one for me, too.

Perhaps Gavin and Frank, although I haven't spoken with Frank for over a decade. If Eric weren't so secretive about his address I'd send him a copy too. One for Chris, and one for Roy. That's 18 at the very least.

Gone are the days when I would automatically send Francesca a copy. One for Connie, makes 19. One for my Doctor. One for Peet I think. I'm going to have to take 25 of them!

One for Redbookish, perhaps, although she is not a believer.

I recently loaded Mint Petra onto the Study PC. Now I'm doing its updates, a long process. Hopefully, cheese won't break the machine after it's been updated. I need also to plug in the all-in-one so I can scan as well as print.

After a bit of terminal work and a couple of false leads, I managed to get my Samsung printer/scanner/copier/fax working as a scanner as well as a printer. It's a bit clunky - makes a big effort scanning - especially in comparison with my Canon, which is a beautiful little machine. So now I can scan in my Study as well as everything else, photocopy and fax mainly. So my Study is complete, technologically speaking. All I need in there is perhaps the amp that's presently in the drawing-room. But the drawing room needs the larger, more generous sound of the amp, more so than the study.

Well that was another typically Linux bit of jiggery pokery but it worked. I am now an happy man.