Journal Entries
Has it really been this long?
Posted Oct 1, 2002
It seems my life, like many others, seems to go in circles. My third year in college, and here I am making a new start at the guide for the third time.
Ah...my third year at school, yet my first year. I can hardly believe I transfered, especially to the place I did. For the past month here I've really been in shock. I mean, did anyone else see this coming? Well, barring the circumstances that arose last year, did anyone see this coming? I really didn't. I mean, I wasn't all that happy at my last school, but far to lazy to start over. Yet here I am, in another school, in another state starting another life. Part of it is very exciting and romantic, just sort of drifting wherever suits me at the time or just sort of going where life takes me without thinking...but there's the key! WITHOUT THINKING. I rarely do anything without analyzing it to death, and here I am in a school paying good money (or borrowing it from the government as the case may be) that I never intended to go to! How does that work? I suppose it's just one of those things that makes my life so silly. I suppose it takes silly to keep us from collasping into ourselves. And as nice as this all sounds, I'm going to have a 40k nightmare when I graduate.
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Latest reply: Oct 1, 2002
Shake the can, man...
Posted Aug 26, 2001
Just about that time again--hitting the open, well ok, congested roads once more in search of diversions from the monotony of the work world, adventure in every new experience and always most importantly, a higher education. Not being the kind of person to take such momentous times lightly, I have though long and hard about school and discovering when classes are supposed to start. After careful consideration the reigning board ruled that while the latter days of my birth month were still upon us, we were not under any circumstances to think about school and the pawning of various and sundry personal items necessary to pay for books. The meeting was adjourned we all went on our separate ways ready to find possibilities for entertainment in the future. One of us found it with a roll of duct tape and a troupe very unfortunate vaudeville cats. God I love caffeine palpitations.
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Latest reply: Aug 26, 2001
Walking the Line (and failing)
Posted Sep 21, 2000
Always on a walk back from a particularly fascinating class my mind tends to wander in directions askew the beaten path of logic.
Seeing the world from a new perspective is a favorite game of mine. I convince myself I have never seen a parking lot full of vehicles and relate them to a grove of planted pines; a reservation of shining, giant seeds of an unknown realm. This tempting of 'insanity' requires great effort and even courage to accomplish. The human mind does not take delight in being deceived by itself, and often refuses to do so unless in self-defense. The willingness is not there. Being a characteristically shiftless species, we are guided by the impulse to escape the most wonderful of beauties in return for the avoidance of labor. Even further still, the fear of uncertainty drives us to cling to 'normality' like static; the pull is far too strong.
One day I smile at the hope that humanity brings with the friendly glance of a stranger, the next I scoff and scorn the malicious laugh lines of society, forever perverting the face of an unobtainable perfection. People change like the tide; always a greater force masters the flow. Humanity is overcome by its underlying intentions, where a simple smile is a threat of impending war.
(Perhaps I've had more than my fair share of ranting for the day...perhaps I need more sleep...)
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Latest reply: Sep 21, 2000
Random Sandal Footage
Posted Sep 13, 2000
On a return trip back to my dorm room from a particularly fascinating class, I began to turn rather introspective, and I allowed my mind to be swept away on a rafting trip down my stream of consciousness. Walking across the vast expanse of a parking lot radiating with heat, I think my mind took a turn for the worse, and embarked on a journey into a white water branch of the river. I began to consider just how very hot the pavement would be to someone walking across it barefoot, and was suddenly more grateful for my Birkenstock sandals than I have been in a long while. I thought about it so much that I actually started to feel the heat through the sole of the shoe like a thin, threadbare pot holder on a heavy tray of lasagna. Of course, that was ridiculous; there was no way the pavement was that hot without it melting the bottom of the sandals. I thought how simple an invention the sandal was, and admired the people who invented them…I wish I was the one…
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Latest reply: Sep 13, 2000
Mud
Posted Aug 15, 2000
I'm so sick of mud, I could spit.
There was a flash flood in my town this weekend, and although exciting at the time, the remnants cause the disaster to become a dirty word. Rain. Mud. $100 Mil in overall damages in my town alone.
For the first time today the sun shone, and the sky was an eerie crystal blue; persuasion to hit the roads in search of anything but the house we have been cooped up in for days (well maybe not me, I don't let any silly natural disasters get in my way). Yet, cabin fever had definitely set in, and was going for the kill (if she says one more thing to me, I'm gonna snap...). A general air of tension had failed to lift with the barometric pressure, and I needed to get out fast. I couldn't, and had to deal with her inane ramblings (which, believe it or not, are far less interesting, and a whole lot more irritating than mine)...
I think I will spit...but not outside. That would only make more mud.
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Latest reply: Aug 15, 2000
Nineto Okami
Researcher U145244
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