h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Hey there Walter,
Thought I'd call on you at home to take up your offer of advice on addressing pollies.
I think I should keep the letter short, just referring to the issue I really object to which is the suggestion that the Minister of Agriculture shouldn't be asked technical questions because he isn't a scientist. I thought I'd simply say that
-I'd heard he'd made this statement in connection with questions on food safety in agriculture.
-That this worried me and if he can't represent us (the public), who don't have access to the scientists, over these questions then can he tell me who does?
I also thought I'd send it via my own MP, but I'm not sure about that. My MP is Conservative and I don't want party politics played over this but it is the usual route to take I believe.


My aim is get an answer, other than just an aknowledgement of having received the letter.

Any advice appreciated,Wz.

PS I like the poem.

Hi Wazungu,

Goodness, you must think I am a real dill!! Your message came up at the bottom of my page, where I never look, and if the beloved had not brought it and others to my attention I would still be in blissful ignorance. I have to go down to Parliament in about two minutes, but will get on to your query first thing in the morning. Again, my profuse apologies. Take care,

Walter.

No worries, any thyme.
Wz.

Hi Wazungu,

Unless you are writing a blackmail letter it would be well to bear in mind that politicians almost never read mail directed to them as Ministers. Every Minister has hordes of minders and armies of bureaucrats whose responsibilities include inwards mail and preparing responses to it, quite often under their own names i.e. "The Minister has asked me to respond" or "Your letter has been referred for my attention" etc etc. A very good way of eliciting a ministerial repsonse is to have your letter published in a major daily newspaper - the pollie will then 'reply' to you in the letters page. An even better way is to get a journalist to take up the issue and run with it. This works fine in a small State like Tassie but probably isn't going to be as effective in the UK.

BTW, you say that you 'heard' he had made that statement. You do need to make sure of your facts (i.e. if you wrote to my minister on the basis of something you heard I would have him sign a ltter saying in effect 'sorry, I didn't say that', or 'Sorry, can you be more specific' etc etc).

Sending a letter via your local MP, particularly an Opposition member, is ordinarily worse than useless since governments take even less notice of letters from Opposition members than they do constituents. Governments are totally unconcerned about electorates in which the sitting member is not one of theirs. On the other hand, you could think about asking her/him to put a question in Parliament, with or without notice, and usually they are happy to do so if it puts some heat on the Government.

If you do write, keep it: simple, concise, polite but firm. Don't adopt an apologetic tone: you have every right to enquire and he/she has an obligation to reply. On the other hand, there is often a fine line between firm and discourteous. The objective is to get up the Minister's nose but not give her/him the chance to slither out of responding. If you want an answer to a question, remember we bureaucrats all know 'Yes Minister' off by heart, in fact we could write the next series. So make your question unambiguously specific because this helps to reduce the opportunities for obfuscating and avoiding direct answers. If you are able to, write on behalf of an association, or a group, or see if you can get others to 'sign' your letter.

You may also like to think about writing direct to the Prime Minister i.e. "Your Minister said xyz - does that correctly reflect your government's policy (or whatever) etc etc." The process takes even longer, and all of the above still applies, but it is probably the surest way to guarantee an answer and perhaps an articulation of policy, which may or may not be a bonus, depending on which way you look at it.

Waz, I hope these jottings are of some use, but if I've missed the line please come back to me. See, my bureaucratic training - I have automatically assumed that I haven't answered your questions!!!

Clive

Thankyou!
There's a lot to think about there. Tactics hey. What you say will definately be of use, I need to consider the options, writing to the PM hadn't even crossed my mind. Very unbureaucratically you HAVE answered the questions.
Wz