h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

This takes some explaining, I suppose.

One of my major pastimes is playing a certain Massively Multiplayer Online Role Playing Game. It's not important which one. In this particualar one, people can form permanent groups called guilds. The purpose of guilds is generally to hunt together, trade together, and generally hang out. Guild get their own chat channel. The guild I am in was formed by people who quoted The Princess Bride incessantly, and decided to form a guild of people who just wanted their own channel in which to joke around.

So far as I know, there is only one person in our guild who is female. Let's call her Deedee. Tonight she was on, and made some remark about being drunk. Naturally, the rest of the guild joked about it just like we joke about everything else. The joking was a bit off-color, referring to Captain Morgan's rum, and the sexual innuendo behind their slogan of "Have a bit of the Captain in you," or something like that. Dreamer was highly offended, and started talking about leaving the guild because she felt like she was surrounded by juveniles.

Some background on Deedee. As far as I know, she's a very cool person. When the guild started, there was some issues with who we would let in and who we wouldn't, people were let in who shouldn't have been, and some people got their feelings hurt. Dreamer said to me at the time that she really enjoyed being in the guild with me (and a few others) and pleaded with me not to leave. Now I find our positions reversed, with me trying to persuade her not to leave. I'm not a very persuasive guy, and I spent an hour messaging back and forth with her to nail down her concerns, and trying to address them.

To a certain degree, what I feared came to pass. I had issues with some people in the guild because they were letting in all sorts of people I didn't know, and I was under the impression that the guild was to be a tightly knit group of 6-10 friends. I didn't want other people in who I didn't know, who wouldn't add anything intelligent to the guild's conversations. Now, people I didn't let in and I didn't know are offending a very good friend of mine, and I might soon find that this friend has left because of it.

If you haven't gotten the real point yet, here it is. In the last 3 paragraphs, I haven't made any reference to the fact that this is all taking place over the computer-generated channels of an online computer game. In fact, the narrative could describe any newly formed association or club, especially one at a university. So I found myself doing amateur counseling over a computer chat channel with someone I've never met in real life, because of something she heard over another chat channel, in an imaginary association of people in an imaginary world generated by a computer game. What is this, the 4th derivative of reality?

It was very surreal, and I think I've seen the first step towards a world like The Matrix.

* s through with a pointy stick*

Great, isn't it!

My, what a big stick you have.

Shouldn't I be saying that?

Well, yes, but that doesn't preclude me from saying that to you, too.

Ok then!!

What's this I read about you having not been on all day? You've probably been on more than I have today! And I've been sitting at work doing (almost) nothing except posting on here and slashdot!

...really have to kick my procrastinating habit, don't I...?

You should. But I'm sure you'll get around to it tomorrow. Or the next day, if you don't have time. Or next week, maybe.

Or sometime after a blue moon. Or when pigs fly...

Oink, oink....weee! (thud)