h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I have skimmed your piece entitled "My Weight Loss Journey" and am now about to settle down and really read it thoroughly: I am really impressed by what I have read so far.

I have "Yo-yo" dieted in the past, with my most spectacular body-bunjee jump being minus 35 kg plus 40 kg ..... all completed within a year. I have been on (and off) dietary control for 45 of my 53 years of age. And can I just say from my perspective that as a lifetime pursuit, yo-yo dieting really really sucks.

In April this year, I managed to just nudge the 160 kg mark (and when you are this heavy, it's difficult to find scales that will weigh you!). I have Coronary Heart Disease, Hardened Arteries, Calcaneal Spurs, Diabetes (and many of its lovely, lovely complications) - and my blood sugars were no longer controllable by oral meds and diet.

I ate myself into this pile of ....

I have now been given a year to live. (Come on, Ref! I'm only 53!) Give or take a bit. Unless I can radically correct my obesity. Thankfully, a special clinic has cast me a lifeline in the form of total food replacement (and, touch wood - I'm making good progress, although the regime is brutal!)

Please try even harder not to follow my pattern of stupidity, which I find is far from uncommon amongst the chronically obese. And I saw much common ground with your story too.

I know you've been having a hard time of things lately - and those anxieties really do not help, but just think of what you have achieved so far. I bet, if you were to pile up weights equal to what you've shed so far, you couldn't even walk upstairs with them - let alone carry them around all day..... and that is what you did. Every day!

If you were to offer to do a sponsored walk of any distance, carrying your pile of weights, someone who cared would say "Come off it, Natasha. Don't do that. You'll kill yourself. It's not worth it."

And you know they'd be right.

Now come on. Get your head into gear. Stop whingeing around (that's what we Poms do!) and recapture that determination that shines out, alongside your sparkling wit and obvious intelligence, like diamonds in the dirt. Consolidate your advances so far. Love yourself enough to make the last great effort. Then have that baby and make him or her proud to be your offspring.

Oh..... and accept the grateful thanks of a fellow-Hitcher from across the World...... BTW : What height are you and where's your weight now? Get that next ten weeks' diary posted. Please don't allow yourself to slip. The deeper you get into the mire, the harder it is to haul yourself out again.

Lots of love and Hugs from a fat old man who's trying once again....

Wow - thanks so much! And so timely too, as I have just had a good heart-to-heart with my Weight Watchers leader about my inability to lose any more weight since Christmas (I have gone up and down, but essentially I am at the same point as I was over 6 months ago).

Firstly, I want to thank you for opening up about your struggle. I always think those of us who struggle with our weight feel so alone, particularly when those bad voices tell us to eat an entire chocolate cake!!!

I take my hat off to your positivity, as I can only imagine how hard it must be to have such radical steps to take to control a life-theatening situation. Please join us at the Weight Loss club at H2H2 (you can get there by looking at the thread marked "Saturday Weight Loss").

I haven't posted for a while on my own weight loss journey as I felt it was useless while I plateued. Perhaps I will dust off those historical records and update the page, now you have inspired me. And I fully intend to get to my goal weight of 60kg. By the way, my height is 5 feet 3 inches, so this goal is smack bang in the middle of my BMI recommended weight, even though well-intentioned friends who have always known me as overweight shrieked at that figure, claiming I would be "anorexic". I don't tell those people how much I have already lost, as some of them seem to think I am already at a good place - hmph!

And funny you should mention that thing about looking realistically at how much weight I have lost. This week I am in Singapore (and yes, using the hotel gym to walk every day). When I weighed my bags in at Sydney airport they were 14.8kg - exactly the amount I have lost. I asked the lady if I could take them off the weighing machine, lifted them again and was AMAZED that this was the weight that I no longer carry around!

Love and hugs back at you! You have no idea how much you have inspired me - in fact, when I am featured in teh Weight Watchers magazine, I am going to post you a copy of the article that will say "online inspiration helped her reach her goal, even in the face of a long plateau and diminishing courage"

Blimey Charlie !

If egos had mass, you'd have just landed me with an extra ton to lug around. I actually mean what I wrote in the headline. I am not sure as to all the pluses and minuses of "washing your dirty linen in public" - you know, in a way it's a bit like getting sponsored for a diet. It's hard enough for a member of the frugal genotype to lose weight. So what do the morons do? Why, pile the pressure ON....

And when you think of it, we poor fatties got where we got partly because feeding our faces makes us feel better in the face of press and strension. "So more stress would be a good idea" says our evil, scheming, carbohydrate-glutton of a brain. And we say "Oh, you're so clever, brain, you must be right. And so we get sponsored for a hundred pounds a pound and we go public with what is best left as a private - and very tough - tussle.

Oh, and by the way, I am so wise, I am publishing my own dieting story ! At the moment it is going out on a hospital's Intranet, so it isn't available for public view, but I have received such lovely feedback, I am thinking of trying to flog it to someone who will make me rich.

I would absolutely love to hear your opinion of it, but will not post it here as I would risk losing my grip on the Copyright. I will send you the drafts, which are done as bite-sized magazine-style articles, by e-mail if you want to have a look. Just e-mail [email protected] to let me know where to send it.

Fingers crossed. I know how especially difficult it is when you are away on business and the beneficiary of loads of lovely corporate hospitality! But I can also tell you, as a former HR "professional" that lardos command a lot less respect than fit folk. It may be wrong, but we are programmed deep in our brains to instinctively relate to other members of humanity. And lean people are the good hunters - those that will protect and serve us. Fat people are the consumers, the solid, but sometimes not so useful continuity for the tribe. So we fatties have our uses, but if you change your body image, you will find that people react to you differently. And whilst it is quite subjective, I believe they respond more positively. I used to believe people liked a "Big Man". But fat is a different issue.

Wow! Do you get me going! E-mail me. Fingers crossed. And you could maybe think a little about whether you want to be so public in your personal fight....

(((BIG HUG))) Lots of Love, from BigE

Hehehe! You give me much "food" for thought! Especially about that brain thingie I am doing... Honestly, though, thinking about my goals and personality, I absolutely want to make this as public as possible - not for stress it brings (I am actually a pretty self-determined person) but to keep me honest. If I think about the times I get out of control, it's when I think no-one is looking, so the fact that I had announced this to the "world" (or at least the part that was interested) these last six months have been stable, rather than a yo-yo back up the 14.8kgs I have lost...

I'm also a pretty optimistic person (although my insanely optimistic husband would disagree - he would say I am a pramatist). Well, let's just say I am a naturally happy person, and would rather have a good laugh than be depressed for too long. I think that's why I have never actually gone much beyond 100kgs, in that it could have gotten too depressing, and I could have gotten much, much bigger. However, somehow I've always managed to pick myself up, look hard at what I'm doing and take steps. And really, when we talk about yo-yoing, I've only done the Weight Watchers thing twice after getting to around 100kg mark. So the other yo-yoing has been done at lower grounds, so to speak.

I absolutely agree people respond differently when you change your body image. But in my job, I actually gain loads of kudos whether I have been at my heaviest or thinnest, as I am the "Face" of my part of the company. I have to get up in front of up to 500 people to present research findings, and I am a very confident person. So when people come up to me afterwards they focus on my knowledge of my subject. However, I do notice that when I am leaner and looking more toned in my suits, I do get a few more appreciative glances (hmmmm, pandering to the males out there in IT userland!)

I'd love to give you my feedback on your articles (in a former life I was an editor of a magazine, so could give you some pointers if that's the form it will be published as opposed to a book). I will email you from my hotmail account as soon as I finish up here.

On a completely separate note, and a little more ego-boosting for you, I really appreciate the way you are putting your opinion across in the discrimination threads. Non-aggressive, completely refusing to be drawn into emotional arguments and graceful dismissals of those who are not as eloquent or reasoned as yourself.

So far, my Singapore week has not been so gluttenous - I have been availing myself of their treadmill and 25m lap pool (love my swimming) and although the hawker centres are a bit like our greasy spoons, I feel like I am not indulging too badly. In fact, I think I will probably either remain stable or lose a bit. Stay posted!

Oh my Good Lord!

Ulp! I have been talking to a former magazine Editor?

Oh my..... Er, er.... I would not have had the courage to send you the stuff I have if I had read this first.

And I was absolutely gobsmacked by your feedback on the anti-discrimination stuff. At last I seem to have bumped into someone who can actually understand that we will find it hard to make something irrelevant when we keep picking at the scabs.

I absolutely love women. One of my most respected colleagues just happened to be female... and I think she would say that she got where she got by virtue of her looks (she was an amazing Sophia-Loren lookalike) and she did catch the eye of an influential person who was always trying to get where he oughtn't.... but I have to say that despite the distraction of having to constantly fend off the men to a safe distance, she was a really insightful person and a great manager. But her sex-appeal always was an issue... several of my colleagues refused to accept that she had a brain as well as other superb attributes... Dammit! I always used to say my job would have been great without the damned people.

Unfortunately, as a Personnel Manager, they were sort of part of the package. And the story as far as my anonymous friend was concerned did not have the classic happy ending. Or do you know, maybe it did.... She was fired from her Directorship of the Company for marrying a Director of a rival business. Oh, we have gender discrimination protection legislation over here, too. So she was fired for other "reasons". She is now a happy housewife, and occasionally remembers - with a shudder - her past life as an executive.

But was it a story of senseless wasted human assets, or was it a story of a woman ultimately finding her dream life goal? I know a lot of people behaved wrongly along the way.... but . Ahhh.... life... (I'll now be in Marvin mode all bloody day....).... don't talk to me about life.... Did I ever tell you about thie terriffic pain I have in.....

Have a lovely hol, Face

Hey there!

Just sent you an email, but thought I'd add a comment here. Don't be too daunted about my past life - I'm not going to rip your writing to shreds, I promise. Anyway, if you dare to look, my email has some of my more general comments in it, as I thought I wouldn't go line by line. It's more structure that needs attention before you get down to nitty gritty. Let me know what you think.

CYU 'round

Hey, Tashalls !

I appreciate all the time thought and good sense you have shared with me. And any criticism has been entirely costructive. Thankyou so much.

I do hope that we can continue to keep in touch via e-mails now.

I have genuine doubts as to whether my musings are worthy of publication. Which rather applies to this vehicle of communication as well!

But in the traditions of a true "blogger", let it hereby be known that as in the original title of this thread : Tashalls is an Utter Genius !

All power to your elbow.... Big Hug and many thanks from BigE X

"I have genuine doubts as to whether my musings are worthy of publication" - what a sign of a writer...self-doubt!

We all go through it (I'm currently trying my hand at children's books). But I figure, what the hell - even if it's not worthy of publication, the process is satisfying enough.

And just remember, JK Rowling only had 500 copies of her first book published and before that got rejected by pretty much every publishing house in UK. Just think on that!