h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Yours is a scary costume, not suitable for parties with children and small seals.

*looks in mirror carefully to make sure the correct persona has showed up to answer this post*

Are you saying I'm frightening.

*gets a bizarre look on his face, which might pass for surprise*

Whatever do you mean? Surely there is nothing frightening about my simple, easy-to-use, customer-oriented operating system and pre-loaded software.

No, it's the implications there of that scare me. And your appearance, you evil, monopolizing goon.

Why, I wouldn't say I'm evil or monopolizing!! (though I have to give in on the "goon" accusation).

And what of my appearance? (looks down doubtfully). This is my nicest suit....

It's those beady little eyes.

*pops in, leading a crowd of penguins that immediately start laughing hysterically at B*** G88888*

Wow! Penguins!

*Looks Doctor John slowly up and down.*

*Turns his "beady little eyes* towards the oddly out-of-place penguins.*



Aren't you a bit overdressed. I wouldn't be so quick to point and laugh if I were you.



You seem like a decent sort. I'd like to offer you a job helping to design the new improved upgrade for Windows 2000. (It seems there are a few, erm unknown [cough] bugs in it, so we will issue a "fix" for only $59.99.....)

Only if I get founders' options backdated to 1975! Otherwise, I'll be sticking with the penguins

I'm with the Penguins

Hey, Red, now that I know that you are really Irving, I'm a bit hurt that you were so mean to me. Erm, I mean to Bill Gates.

Funny thing was, I started the character because I DO despise Bill Gates, yet when everyone was so mean to me, I really started taking it personally....

Odd, trying to be someone else.

Irving (Red, too) is a Mac user. That's why he doesn't like Gates too terribly much. Please remember that the maliciousness was directed at the *costume* not at *you*.