h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Hi Karen,

I haven't run into you on here for ages. I hope all is well with you and your girls. I find I feel the need to consult you in your capacity as relationship guru.

I went out with a man tonight. Oh yes. I joined one of those online dating sites the week before Christmas. The chap I saw tonight (we'll call him 'W') was the first one on there to catch my attention, I thought he looked reasonable and I liked his profile, so I left him a message. We have exchanged several messages on the dating site (he writes really well, which has of course impressed me no end) and we spoke on the phone for the first time on Monday.

In the meantime, about 8 other blokes have seen my profile on the website and left messages for me over the Christmas weekend. I hadn't expected to be this popular! It took me all of last week to plough through my messages and leave suitable replies for the ones I liked and gently get rid of the ones I was not so keen on. I've actually hidden my profile for a while as it is all getting a bit much. I didn't realise it was going to be such hard work

Two other blokes have left me their phone numbers (some of them are a tad forward for my liking) and two more have suggested that we meet. So I'm not sure what to do now, I feel like I am stringing some of them along a bit. I don't know if I should speak to or agree to meet some of the others.

I met W tonight for the first time. He's nice - sort of dishevelled and stubbly with rather lovely dark brown eyes. He was pleasant company and after about an hour I was feeling really rather happy with things and thinking that this might actually be a goer. He suggested that we should go and have something to eat together, which we did. I have to admit that my evening slid slightly when we stood up to walk out of the pub. I was wearing high heels and this made me taller than him. I have never been out with such a titchy bloke. Why should that be a problem? I don’t know. He drives an enormous car too – what is it with little blokes and big cars? Anyway, the meal passed pleasantly enough but by about 9 o’clock I was beginning to feel that we were running out of things to say to each other. He paid the bill, which I was not entirely comfortable about and then he offered me a lift home. I decided it would be safe to accept a lift, but that there was no way on earth I was going to ask him in. He didn’t seem to mind. Half an hour later I received a text from him saying that he can’t wait to see me again. Why don’t I feel the same?

I realise that I have no idea how this stuff is supposed to work. The last time I went on a date was 1993 and that lead to an eleven-and-a-half year relationship.

So now what do I do now? I'll probably go out with W again if he asks, but do I go out with any of the other geezers? I do like W, but I can’t somehow see us living happily ever after and I could already list several things about him that irritate me. He is a nice man, seems to be reasonably successful in his business, not bad looking (apart from being a short arse) and we seemed to get on extremely well. So why am I typing you a message about it at half-past midnight while feeling miserable?

Are you still seeing your chap? I hope that is working out.

It's probably time I went to bed.

Chat soon
Liz
~

Hi Liz


It's funny, I've been thinking about you over the break, it's a while since we chatted isn't it and I was wondering how you were doing

I've been called many many things in my life but *relationship guru*, gosh ,are you sure?? With my track record with men??

Hey, well done with the dating site!! It's a bit nerve racking at first isn't it? I found I tended to view every man who got in touch with the utmost suspicion for a while and, like you, I found some of them much too pushy even after just a couple of conversations. After a bit tho I think you begin to get better at weeding out the ones you will get on with and the ones you won't

The date sounds like it went ok ...no bells and whistles but it sounds as if you had a reasonable time of it and he was obviously happy if he's champing at the bit to see you again. But I don't think you should worry too much if you're not over the moon, head over heels ... y'know the sort of thing. There are a lot of frogs out there and knowing our luck we're going to find most of 'em between us See him again if you want to but maybe leave it for a couple of weeks so he'll get the message. In the meantime, if you fancy seeing any of the other blokes who've got in touch, then I'd go for it - what have you got to loose? YOu've made no commitment to any of 'em have you and you can bet your bottom dollar that if the boot was on the other foot they wouldn't hesitate, any of 'em!

Anyway, good luck with it all. Just do what you're comfortable would be my best advice I guess.

I undestand you feeling a bit miserable last night - I think it takes such a lot of courage to go on these dates, in some ways it's a bit of a let down when they don't really work. Don't despair tho, just think of it like this - what else would you have been doing last night??

I went out with a couple of the blokes I met on the site I was on. One I saw on and off for about 18 months, nothing serious, I'd see him every couple of months and we'd have a meal or a drink and that was that. That eventually fizzled out when I sat there just like you one evening and decided he was hard work! The other bloke is smashing, we've been mates now since the beginning of last year and tho it'd never be any more than mates, we see each other for a day out up in London occasionally and we keep in touch inbetweentimes by e-mail. It's nice. It's friendly but that's all it is. SO - I guess what I'm trying to say is, if nothing else maybe you'll make some new friends - a bit like hootoo but with more RL contact!

Me and Chris split at the end of October - it wasn't really working out for me and I don't think there's any point in keeping on keeping on just for the sake of it. No worries tho, we had a good few months, did some fun stuff and we parted on reasonable terms.

D'you remember the first time I posted to your journal when you and Chris had just split and I rambled on about me and my buddy? Well, he's now got himself a new lady-friend which looks like it's going to be permanent and she's sort of moved in with him ... and it's completely changed our friendship and I've found that really tough. We've been best friends for about 10 years now and done such a lot of stuff together and shared everything (with the fling in the middle of it all) and now I can only see him occasionally because, obviously, he spends his time with his new lady and she's pretty edgy with me so although all 3 of us have got together a couple of times, I don't think I can do it too often. I'm really really happy for him, honest,he's such a truly nice bloke he deserves to be happy, but I'm pretty sad for me. I've lot my buddy and it's been hard to get my head round it. Another friend on here said I should think of it not as *lost* more *mislaid* and I guess she's right but whatever it is, at the moment it hurts like mad.

SO, bet you're sorry you asked now aren't you

In the time-honoured tradition I've rambled and rambled but I hope some of it made some sense to you. You'll be fine with this Liz, don't worry, it's like everything - you get rusty at the dating thing but you'll soon get back into it.

Hope things in the rest of life are going well - let me know what you decide to do about *W* and the others won't ya?

Keep your chin up m'dear
chat soon
K

Hi Karen,

I felt a bit better about W yesterday and even felt brave enough to tell one of my work friends about it. She thinks I should go out with all the blokes who have been in touch with me, but I’m still not sure about that. I’ve dithered about so much with some of them they’re probably fed up with me by now anyway.

I had three texts and a phone call from W yesterday and we’re going to the cinema tonight. When he texted me to ask if I wanted to go out tonight, I didn’t reply straight away and when I did I just asked what films were on and that was when he called me so that he could read the options out to me. He’s been at home all this week so I rather suspect that when he goes back to work on Monday he might have a little less time to devote to thinking about me.

At least one of the other guys works in Ipswich, so I am thinking along the lines of perhaps, if he’s game, meeting him for a drink at lunch time (no chance of bumping into W then). I have looked on the dating site this morning and I can see that W has not been on since before he went out with me, so he doesn’t appear to be chasing after anyone else.

I didn’t expect there to be any whistles and bells and falling in love – there never has been before so I don’t actually believe in any of that stuff. Although I loved Chris dearly, I never actually fell ‘in love’ with him, I just grew steadily more fond of him as the years went by. I missed him really badly over Christmas and I missed him even more after I’d been out on my date the other night (why do I feel so bad about not sending him a Christmas card?) I think it’s just the effort involved in getting to know someone else that depresses me.

I’m sorry that it didn’t work out with you and your Chris. I’m sorry to hear that your losing touch with your good friend too. Another of my hootoo friends (Rains – have you come across her?) has recently fallen out quite badly with a long standing male friend of hers and the main cause of this would appear to be the fact that she got married last year and now puts her husband first instead of her friend. It’s a shame.

Anyway, I should get off as I am supposed to be working. It’s been a weired sort of week really, work has been terribly dull, I haven’t slept very well and I’ve had the mother of all periods, so it probably wasn’t exactly the right time to start seeing other people.

Liz

Hi Liz

Glad you sorted W out in your head and hope the pictures went well last night. You certainly sounded happier and more positive this posting than the first one. Strange how a good nights sleep and the cold light of day put a different emphasis on things isn't it. Anyway, good on ya girl! I think meeting the other bloke one lunchtime is a good idea - you don't want to put all your eggs in one basket so soon after all do you

Sorry to hear you missed Chris over Christmas - I think it's just one of those strange times myself. I always get depressed at Christmas, yearning for times and partners past. I think the rose-coloured specs come into it somewhere. Old relationships just seem so comfortable, especially when there's enough distance to forget about all the *bad* bits, if you know what I mean. And I do understand what you say about the effort required to get to know someone else. Some days it just seems too huge. But onward and upward, it's a new year, we have to be positive

I hear what you say about Rains - it's a difficult situation. I don't think me and my mate will ever fall out, it's just something I have to get my head round. We've both had other *partners* over the years but never anyone this permanent and I think it must be a bit like the kids leaving home - you know that one day it's going to happen but it's still a bit of a toughie when it does. I'll get there eventually - I just need a good kick up the rear end sometimes

Well, you've inspired me to have a look on the dating site I used, I'm still on there somewhere and there's one bloke who I might contemplate contacting, although he lives quite a distance away and I'm never very sure if that's a good thing...

Good luck with things - let me know how it's all going

take care,
Karen

Hiya Karen,

Will and I went and saw 'King Kong' on Friday night, which was rather good, if a little long (I don't think Peter Jackson will ever win any awards for short films!) Will gave me a lift home again, so this time I asked him in. He left at lunch time on Saturday. So much for taking things slowly. He came around again last night and we stayed in with a curry and a bottle of wine which was nice. He is going back to work tomorrow after nearly two weeks off, so he expects to be busy (he runs a business with a friend, so it's not 9 to 5) and I don't expect to hear much from him this week. It'd be nice to get to know him some more, but I'm not pinning all my hopes on it (well, not today anyway).

My friend Sharon e-mailed me this afternoon to ask if Will has a car and lots of money! My Mum would approve of that attitude. I spoke to Mum earlier on this afternoon. She asked what I had been up to, so I said “snogging.” I confessed that Will had stayed the night and she asked if the earth had moved! This is not the sort of conversation I would usually expect to have with my mother!

I can understand your reluctance to try and date someone who lives far away. I put off a couple of the guys that contacted me via the dating site on the grounds of distance. You may remember that I don't have my own car, so there is no point what-so-ever in getting involved with someone who lives any more than about 15 miles away. I don't really want the sort of relationship where you only see each other at weekends. Will doesn't live in Ipswich so he has to trail over here to see me, which is a potential problem for the future (he doesn't seem to mind too much so far though).

Anyway, I shall clear off now and see what other messages I have to look at. It's already late enough in the evening for me to think about making my packed lunch for work tomorrow. I was bored stiff at work last week. My job looks like changing again, but no one seems entirely sure what I am supposed to be doing.

Chat soon.
Liz
~

Hi Liz

well, you certainly seemed to get the hang of the dating thing quickly enough didn't you But seriously, I'm really glad that it's all going well for you. When there's that *spark* it's a darn difficult thing to ignore if I remember rightly

I'm still mulling over the bloke on the dating site - I can't quite make my mind up whether I want to go thru all the trials and tribulations of dating again just yet or opt for an easy life for a while. I think it's a bit half and half really. I'll sit on it for a bit I think before I do anything rash (and at least find out where Halstead is) take the plunge and contact this chappy

Right, I thought I'd just pop in and add my two-penneth for what it's worth but I'm off for an early night now. Have fun with Will this weekend coming and don't forget .... come back soon and let me know how it's all going

Take care Liz, chat soon
Karen

Hi Karen,

<> Chance would be a fine thing! I woke up with a sore throat on Monday. By the time I went to bed on Tuesday, throat was no longer sore but felt like it was full of fluid. This did not aid my sleep. On Wednesday, my voice began to disintegrate and I haven't been able to talk properly since. I haven't been to work since Wednesday either. I went to the doctors on Thursday (a rare event!) but she said it was probably a virus. So, I have been shut up in the house for four days, barely able to speak and feeling like crap! I have been coughing for two solid days and the whole of my abdomen hurts.

Will has been quite sweet - phoning me and sending text messages, but I am already begining to wonder if he has got time for a girlfriend. He did come around last night (and his excuse for being late was that he had been abudcted by aliens) but I'm not sure when I will see him again. However, as I am unwell, we couldn’t have done much this weekend anyway so I will just have to wear it for a while. He stayed last night, which I thought was game of him given my continuous coughing. He was quite funny really; I could tell from the snoring that he was asleep but I had a coughing fit about every 20 minutes for about two hours and he would wake up, commiserate with me and then go straight back to sleep again.

I went into town very briefly this morning, just to go to Sainsbury’s to buy food. I had to get the bus in both directions because I was just too shattered to walk. I made myself a very tasty vegetable stew for lunch and then I went to the hairdressers. My hair looks really rather good, which is a bummer given that I don’t have anyone to admire it. After I got home, I felt really shivery and ill again, so I made myself a little nest out of my single quilt on the floor in front of the fire and went to sleep. What a life!

So, I hope you are having a more interesting weekend than me! I have just been on the dating website as someone else had left me a message. He's a bit old really and he lives 35 miles away, which, given that I don't have a car, is immediately a problem. There is still another guy who seems keen to meet me, but I'm still not sure whether I should see him or not. He knows that I have been seeing someone else, so at least I'd be honest with him.

Let me know if you decide to see this other chap. Halstead is in Essex, isn't it? I had about three archetypal baldy Essex blokes contact me via the dating website, but I think I have managed to put them off.

Anyway, I'm feeling a bit rough now so think I shall log off and go back to my little nest in the lounge.

Chat soon
Liz
~

Hi Liz

poor old you and what bad timing . I bet the last thing you wanted at this stage was a bl**dy virus - honestly life has a nasty way of kicking you in the shins sometimes doesn't it. Still, as you say, Will seems to be very sweet and top marks to him for staying over when you are clearly not well. He seems to be doing and saying all the right things so if you can put up with him being busy a lot of the time, then sounds like you've got it made

You're right, Halstead is in Essex and I think the site reckoned he was about 55 miles away from me. I think realistically that's too far and the route from my place to Halstead isn't the best - It'd probably take me the best part of an hour, hour and a quarter, which is fine once in a while but would definitely be a pain in the butt if anything did come of it. Maybe this is jumping the gun a little (just a little!!) but I don't think I'm going to bother with this guy. In fact, I think I've decided to give myself some down-time for a while and so I'm going to do nothing at all until after Easter. I need some time to get back on top of things and the pressures and complications caused by dating are something I don't really need right now.

My weekend looks like being unexciting but pretty busy all the same. All 3 of us have had haircuts today. I take the girls to one locally and we waited half an hour for their lady to get around to them. Then later on I went into town to get mine cut and waited another 25 minutes there. What is it with hairdressers? They seem to be incapable of keeping to any kind of schedule. I don't mind waiting 5 or 10 minutes but half an hour at a time just seems to be a bit of a joke. That seems to be pretty much all I have done today, except I went to the gym for a spin class this morning and spent this evening running the girls around.

Tomorrow I'm off to see my parents for a cuppa in the morning then it's going to be feet up in front of the tele tomorrow afternoon Actually, I could do with a little nest in front of the fire just like yours I think

Then before we know it, it'll be Monday morning and we'll be back in work. Deep joy

Well, I'm off to bed now. You take care of yourself and I hope your virus disappears soon. In the meantime, make sure Will keeps up the good work and looks after you properly.

Chat soon,
Karen

Hi Karen,

I'm feeling a bit better this evening, so the plan is to go back to work tomorrow. When I was sat here at 6am, sipping hot water and waiting for my paracetamol to take effect, I seriously doubted whether I would be well enough to go back to work. I went back to bed around 7ish and slept until 10:30 and then sat around feeling awful for a couple of hours. However, once I did get myself up and moving I felt a lot better. I've only done a few house hold jobs today (changed sheets, cleaned bathroom, ironed a couple of things) so the house looks like a tip, but at least I don't feel as rotten as yesterday. I still can't talk though.

The hairdressers that I go to are pretty good for timekeeping - I've never had to wait long at all. They are a bit expensive, but they manage to get some shape into my hair (it's curly, so it's a challenge) and they seem to be booked solid at least two months in advance, so clearly other people think they are good too.

I think you are right not to bother trying to date someone so far away. I find it difficult enough with Will and he's only 15 miles away. Fortunately, he is used to doing a lot of driving (his place of work is 30 miles from where he lives), so trailing into Ipswich to see me doesn't phase him much. However, it does mean that he is always in control of when I can see him and I'm not keen on that. I plan to offer to go over to see him on the train one weekend, but that's really the best I can do. It'd be much nicer if I could just pop 'round when I felt like it. I have had a couple of brief texts from him today but this week I shall be looking to make some proper plans for next weekend as I already feel that we are drifting with this.

Anyway, 'Child of our Time' is on telly in a few minutes, so I am off to watch that.

Have a good week.
Liz
~

Hi Liz

how's things now? Is your virus getting better?

Well the week's been uneventful so far - hope yours has been better. Did you manage to pin Will down and make some plans for the weekend? I had an e-mail from my bud this morning at work asking if I fancied a drink or a curry on Friday evening. I've opted just to go for a drink as it's payday next week and I am, therefore, skint at the moment but I think it's going to be just him and I this time so it'll be nice to catch up .... I was going to say *without his lady hanging around* which sounded a bit callous, but I guess you know what I mean

And what about your other chappie? Have you managed to meet up with him yet? If he actually lives in Ipswich (or did I imagine that bit?) then looking only at the practicalities of it, at least you'd be able to pop round and see him rather than having to wait for him to come over to you all the time. It's nice to feel a little bit in control isn't it, even if actually most of the time things would be just the same as they are with Will.

I've just been having a long chat with my eldest daughter re boyfriend troubles. She's with an absolutely smashing lad but the one drawback is that he is soooo possessive and hates it if she goes out with any of her girlfriends. She's only 16 and she should be out having a giggle but he makes her life so difficult she only gets out with the girls once in a while, which is a shame. She's doing some soul-searching at the moment and wondering if she should finish with this lad and, as much as I like him, I really think she should. She's too young for all this agro. I didn't like to tell her that no matter how old you get the problems are just the same - it didn't seem fair to depress her somehow

Well, I've not got a lot on for the weekend except for the drink on Friday. I have to get to Homebase on Saturday sometime to try to find a magnetic catch which will stop my cat pushing the sitting room door open and spreading fur and mud all over the furniture. And Saturday morning I've got a bloke coming round to give me a quote for re-roofing my storeroom. The roof leaks and I've put it off as long as I really can, so I'm going to have to bite the bullet and get it done before all the beams rot and I have to have the whole lot replaced. Not exactly life on the edge but I guess it'll have to do.

Right, I'm off to bed now for a bit of a read so - hope you have a good week and I'll catch up with you again soon.

Take care,
Karen

Hi Karen, nice to hear from you as always.

I've still not completely shaken off the virus, but I have got my speaking voice back at long last! I went back to work on Monday when I probably shouldn't have, but I have been recovering slowly through the week. I am coughing a lot less and have now had two nights in a row of unbroken sleep - bliss!

Because I haven't felt well, I haven't done anything further about meeting other people. The Portugeuse guy is still keen, but he lives too far away (t'other side of Colchester) and he works in a restaurant, so I don't imagine he gets that much free time. Fortunately, he's gone to Portugal to see his Mum for a week, so that gets him out of the frame. The younger chap from Ipswich I really don't think I will bother seeing. He's about 7 years younger than me, so he's early 30's, but he comes across as terribly immature in some of his messages - his life seems to revolve around Ipswich Town Football club and watching DVD's and he admits to often being in trouble at work and never having any money because he spends it all on DVD's. Hmmm, sounds a bit too much like my ex-husband. So that just leaves the guy from Felixstowe, who I would still like to meet assuming he hasn't got fed up with waiting for me. I shall probably send him an e-mail later today.

As for Will, well after a week of sending me a text everyday and phoning me every other day suddenly there was almost no contact at all. When he left here last Saturday morning, there was something a bit odd about him. He sent me a text midweek saying he was really busy with his work, so I replied asking if he'd like to do something on Saturday night. I had already arranged to spend Friday evening with my friend Debs from work. She came around about 7ish, I cooked her a meal, we drank a bottle of wine and had a nice girly evening. It's years since I've done that and it was really lovely!

At some point during the evening (not sure when, I was a bit plastered by then ), my mobile rang and it was Will. He sounded very odd. I told him that Debs was with me and asked if I could call him back today and he said that was fine. So, this afternoon I rang him and after much humming and hawing, he admitted that he really doesn’t have time to see me at the moment; he's not sure about things in his own head and feels that it would be better to leave this now rather than have anyone get hurt. I'm disappointed, I really liked him and I would have liked to get to know him better, but I had suspected since last Saturday that he had changed his mind and I am grateful that he had the courage to say so rather than limp on with something he wasn't happy with (which is what dear old Chris did for years). My previous shortest 'relationship' was a month, so two weeks is a new record low for me.

It does seem a shame to disillusion your daughter about men, but that might be better than at life of unrealistic expectations. It is indeed the case that men are an alien species. I hope she parts from her control freak - as you say, she is way too young to be with someone with those sort of jealousy issues.

I know what you mean about being skint at this time of the month - I had promised myself a trip into town tomorrow for a bit of retail therapy, but I've just looked up my credit card online and this months bill is already pushing £500 without today's groceries so I think shopping will have to wait until next weekend (my billing date is 25th, so by next weekend my spending will be going on February's bill). I need to get some workmen in to do some stuff to my house too - I suppose I will have to start getting some quotes in February. I need some paving re-done, I plan to have my front windows double glazed, my stair area needs decorating and I need to get a proper loft access put in so that I can get someone to check my roof out as the survey suggested it needed strengthening when I moved in six-and-a-half years ago! And if I've got any savings left after all that, it will be a miracle.

I hope you had a nice evening catching up with your buddy.

Chat again soon.

Liz
~

Hi Liz

I spent the evening with my buddy. It turned out that he wanted to go out last night so he could tell me that he's selling his house and moving in with his new lady. Then in time they will also sell her house and buy something together. So that's that isn't it. He promised that we'd still see each but *not as often*.

I feel like cr*p at the moment. I didn't realise it would get to me this much. We used to have so much fun together, we'd go everywhere and do everything and I think this has all made me realise how much I've missed him recently.

Sorry to hear about Will - life's a waste of time sometimes isn't it.

I'm gonna go now, I'll come back again when I've got my head together.

Take care Liz
Karen

Hi Karen,

Yeah, life's a real bummer. Which is why I am on here at 1.30 in the damn morning when I really need to be asleep. I have just had the mother of all coughing fits and I am waiting for the spasms in my throat to ease up so that I can go back to bed.

I'm sorry that your friend's new relationship is impacting so badly on your life at the moment. We all need someone to be close to.

Chat soon
Liz
~

Hi Liz

how are you feeling now? Sounds like your virus is still lurking there but I hope at least the coughing fits have improved!

I'm feeling a bit more rational now. I've had a bad couple of days, I think this episode with my buddy was the last straw really because on the face of things, as you say - it doesn't really make a huge amount of difference to me on a day to day basis. I was scared that it would mean we would drift apart but we've had a long chat and exchanged some e-mails and I don't think that will happen, although obviously things will be different to the way they have been for the last 10 years or so. But overall I think I've been pretty low for a long time. If I'd been stronger generally I'd have been able to be much more positive. But, let's face it - life goes on and we have to get on with it whether we like it or not don't we.

Sorry things with Will petered out but you're right, better to find out now than when you're really hooked. It's good to find someone honest enough to tell you the score and not just give you the runaround at least. Sounds like you've got plenty of other irons in the fire and whether you decide to meet any of the other guys is down to you isn't it, which is a nice place to be in my view

Well, my roofman came on Saturday and I'm waiting for the quote in the post. He promised it by mid-week. If it's not going to be a huge sum a friend from work and I have sort of spoken about trying to get away for a few days in the summer on a last minute panic holiday. She's on her own as well and I think something to look forward to and a few days in the sun would give us both a bit of a boost. If it never happens at least it's a light at the end of the tunnel at the moment

Anyway, I'm going to say cheerio for now. I need to pop out and buy myself a sandwich. I haven't really eaten since Friday teatime, except for a couple of oatcakes here and there, so I need to get something solid inside me again. A sure sign that I'm feeling better if I fancy food! On the positive side, it's sorted the post Christmas paunch out

Hope the weeks going well for you,
take care and I'll catch you again soon

karen

Hello Karen,

Glad to hear you are feeling a little more perky.

I am feeling much better thanks (unlike my PC, whose screen is flickering in a most alarming manner). I'm still coughing a little bit, but I've slept through the night for something like six consecutive nights now, which is a big bonus. I'm rather tired and I have a slightly dodgy tum, so I don't think I've completely shaken off the virus, but I am heaps better than I was.

My new office is rather cold and drafty, which is probably not doing much to improve my health, but never mind. The Estates Department tell me that the only solution is to completely seal up my window, but as summer is (hopefully) only a few months away, I don't fancy that option much.

As I'm sure I've mentioned before, of all the men I had 'met' on the dating site, Will was the only one I really liked. Against my better judgement I had lunch with one of the others yesterday. He was pleasant enough I suppose, apart from being short, fat, balding, intolerant and very dull company. I doubt I shall bother with any of the others. There is one that I haven't properly exchanged messages with as yet, so I'll try a bit of e-mail correspondence with him and see what happens. Someone at work gave me a copy of an article about a different dating site this week, which looks rather promising actually. It's called 'No More Frogs' and does seem to be less of a cattle market than some of them (it has a much higher ratio of women members than most other dating sites), so maybe I'll give that a look in a couple of weeks. I have amended my profile on the dating site I am already registered just in case I decide to reactivate it. I felt I needed to add a bit more info to try and discourage the 'hi there, you look nice, give me a call' brigade. I still can't resist the urge to sneak a peak at Will's profile when I log on and I note that he is still logging on several times a week. No time for me, but time for other daters it would seem.

I still haven't done anything about quotes for work on my house. I am aiming to have the work done in March (to coincide with raiding my ISA before 1 April and so only affect this years allowance), so I should probably start getting quotes in the next couple of weeks. I could make the calls from work - I haven't got anything else to do.

I should really be doing some ironing today, but I just can't summon up the energy. I walked into town and back to buy groceries this morning and I still haven't recovered from that really. I'll probably just mess about on here until it's time for Harry Hill's TV Burp.

Chat soon
Liz
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Hi Liz

I had a quick peek at that No more frogs site you mentioned and it looks different, but a tad expensive at the moment! I'm keeping it is reserve, let me know if you venture on there and how you get on

Sorry to hear your other date didn't go so well - it's really a bit of a lottery isn't it. I've had a few replies now I'm back on-line, but some of them are just plain wierd aren't they. We'll see how it goes I think - I've signed up for 3 months so I'll stay until that expires and then have a bit of a think about going somewhere else.

Had a better week this week all in all. Went up to London yesterday with a friend from work to see Billy Elliot It was really good, lots of dancing and singing as you'd expect. We went up during the morning and had a mooch round Harrods and Harvey Nicks as well, just because, then found a pub and had some lunch and a couple of glasses of . Stayed over at the Novotel in Hammersmith which was all part of the *deal* and came home this morning. It made such a change to get away from here for a while and the show was great fun.

Just to spoil the whole feeling this afternoon my washing machine has died. In dying it managed to fuse all the lights and sockets in the storeroom it lives in. Which also houses the freezer. So for half hour or so and 3 fuses, until I had narrowed it down to the washing machine, I was a little concerned it was something seriously wrong with the electrics. They're a bit of a Heath Robinson affair out in the store and I wouldn't have been a bit surprised if the whole thing had finally gone kaboom. But no, it's just a new washing machine required. Great timing as I've arranged to have the roof done on Monday . Still, as the quote for the roof was a couple of hundred pounds less than I'd expected I spose in the Great Plan of things I'll be no worse off.

Other than that a fairly quite week. Things are pretty slow at work - it sounds as if you are too. The trouble with that is the time drags doesn't it. I could do with something to keep me busy at the moment. I'm doing much better, but I do need to keep busy and stop myself thinking too much.

Well, I'm just about to pour another glass of so I'll say ttfn and sign off while I'm still fairly coherent

hope you're ok and life is treating you well
chat again soon
Karen

Hey Karen,

I'm glad you had a nice time in London - it sounded a really good outing.

I went to a wedding reception last night at a funny little place just off the A12 near Kelvedon. The bride used to be a Research Officer at the college, which is how I know her (it was she who nick-named me Lizzbett). Some other work colleagues were there and I travelled over with some of them. The arrangement was to all meet at my house at 6.45, but Harvey and Laura didn’t turn up until nearly seven o’clock. Harvey (who lives way out in the sticks) insisted on bringing his car in case he wanted to leave early and Aaron was also driving, so on the way there I went in Aaron’s car and Laura travelled with Harvey. Unfortunately, Aaron’s car expired after about five miles (the electrics all packed up), and we had to make a detour so that Aaron could borrow his Mum’s car. His car didn't actually make it as far as his Mum's house, and we had to get a lift with Harvey (good job he was following us!) so by the time I got to the venue, I’d been in three different cars and we were somewhat late! And then after all that, Harvey stayed until the end so we needn’t have come in two cars after all. It was a nice little do anyway, we did a lot of sitting around chatting and not as much dancing as I would have liked, but I had a really nice time. The bride looked very nice in a two piece wedding gown that she had bought on e-bay and intends to resell at a profit! By the time we got there, she had abandoned her high-heels and underneath her lacy and bejewelled skirt, she sported a pair of fluffy white slippers! Harvey took me and Laura home so that Aaron could go back to his Mum's and sort his car out. I got in around quarter-to-one, which is the latest night I’ve had in a long time. It was a good night.

I never sleep well after drinking, so I'm a bit tired today. I feel like I should go out and do something, but I really can't be bothered.

Shame about your washing machine. My friend Laura has recently bought a new machine, which broke down after only a week and flooded her cellar. And myself, apart from my PC monitor keep changing colour, I discovered this week that the ansaphone function on the telephone I bought only six months ago is not working anymore. I rang BT and they said that as it is still under guarantee I need to take it back to the shop - so I'm really looking forward to queuing in Argos tomorrow lunch time to try and get that changed.

Work has picked up significantly. The college is going to be the subject of an Ofsted inspection at the end of the month so it's panic stations and all hands to the pump!

I haven't joined No More Frogs yet, I want to exhaust all the interest from Dating Direct first. This week I have been exchanging e-mails with a nice sounding man who lives not too far away from me, and I would quite like to meet him. The young chap who boasts the large DVD collection is still keen to meet me. And then there is the pushy one who sent me his telephone number again this week. And I’m ignoring the Portuguese bloke at the moment because I don’t know what to say to him. Some of them are a bit odd (and don’t want to take no for an answer), but I think part of the issue is that most dating websites have more male members than female; hence I’ve still got four chasing after me a month after telling three of them that I’d met someone. My full membership on Dating Direct ran out a couple of weeks ago and I currently have my profile hidden in the interests of not attracting anymore losers. I know there are some nice guys out there (I went out with one of them), so I guess it’s just a case of persevering, although some days I do wonder if I can really be bothered.

Anyway, my broadband connection is giving me gip (it’s cut me off four times in the last ten minutes), so I’m going to have to abandon this message.

Take care and have a good week.
Liz
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Hi Liz

how's things? Hope everything is going well. Any more hot dates?? Did you get together with that guy you were telling me about ?

Things here have been strangely quite busy of late ... the girls are at home this week so bedtime has become a thing of the past and I'm finding that I now have to fight for possession of the pc in the evenings . Hence I'm sending you this from work *rolls eyes*

Your wedding antics sound like something out of a sit-com but I bet you had a giggle anyway. And I like your friends' style - no formal occasions should take place without fluffy slippers in my view.

Well, nothing much has been going on on the social front here. I went out with my buddy last week for a quick drink and things have been fine. He's got his house up for sale and is in the process of moving all his stuff into his new ladies' house and I think at last I'm getting my head sorted out which is good

I did have a date lined up for tonight but the guy cancelled (grannies funeral - yeah right ) so hopefully we can work something else out when he's back. Other than that I'm off out with a friend from work on Saturday evening. We're going to explore a different town which, reputedly, has more *nice* bars and places you can dance than here. Anyway we thought we'd give it a try and see. Nothing ventured nothing gained eh? It'll be a real plus to find somewhere for a bit of a boogie where I don't feel like a complete OAP I'll keep you posted

And that's about that. Washing machine is arriving on Saturday. I'll be pleased about that and I'm sure my mum will feel the same. Hoover went kaboom on Monday so it's obviously a bad time for me and the domestic applicances

Anyway, gotta go - sorry this is brief but I wanted just to pop by and say hello. Didn't want you to think I'd disappeared off into the cosmos again.

Have fun Liz,
chat again soon
Karen

Hey Karen,

Nice to hear from you. I almost missed your message. I haven't been on her much over the past 10 days.

So, yes, I have been out with the nice sounding bloke who lives nearby. We had our third date at lunchtime today. He walked me home and we had a bit of a cuddle on the sofa. He has arranged to see some friends tonight, but did say he might come back later. I rather hope he doesn't really, I'm not in the mood. He is a nice chap, rather romantic and sends me several text messages each day, including most evenings one that says "night night darlin', sweet dreams". I do want to see him again, I'd just rather not see him tonight.

I had my first date with Kim (for that is his name) just over a week ago on a Friday evening, but I then cleared off to spend the weekend with my friend Sharon. We I went walking near Nayland last Saturday afternoon and then afterwards had tea and French pastries in a rather nice pub. A very grown up afternoon out, I thought. She cooked us dinner and we watched a DVD on Saturday night. Her house is right by Brett Vale Golf Club and we walked by part of the golf course on Sunday morning and then we were joined by another friend and her husband in the afternoon. The other friend is currently being treated for cancer, but looked astonishingly well.

So that was last weekend and then this week seems to have been a mad whirl of work, phone calls, text messages and then there was a date with Kim on Wednesday night. Work has been a bit tense this week - Ofsted inspection starts Monday. Oh deep joy! I saw the QA Admin lady on Friday morning and she looked like she was going to cry. I've got most of the paperwork ready for the curriculum area I have been assigned to look after (Science & Maths) but I'm still missing two
course files. Oh well, it will sort itself out next week no doubt. I've organised an evening out for my work chums for next Friday - I think we will need a drink by then!

So, have you managed to reschedule your date yet?

Sorry to hear about your domestic appliances expiring! These things usually come in threes, so I hope nothing else breaks down or blows up!

I hope you and your work friend had a nice evening out. I like a good boogie myself (as I'm sure I've mentioned). I might be going grooving with my girlie mates next week after our Thai meal. There is an event called 'Harry Palmers' happening next Friday. It's a sixties night that takes place about once every two months and the husband of one of my colleagues DJ's there, so we might go on there after the restaurant. So far, I have got a definite 8 (including myself) confirmed for Friday night, so I am really chuffed that so many want to come. I should do this stuff more often.

Anyway, I look forward to hearing from you again when you have time.

Take care
Liz
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