h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

My friend Sharon recently upped-sticks and left Aberdeen to live and work in St Louis, Missouri for three years. Her adventure so far has been a catalogue of dissasters - lost luggage, potentially lethal gas leak in new appartment no hot water and temperatures f 880 degrees plus, fruitless attempts to communicate what a 'ruck-sack' is to an unhelpful and wooden american airport worker - that kind of thing.

By far her biggest problem so far, however, has been the total lack of furnature in her new apartment. The other day she discovered that a women in he apartment block was leaving and getting rid of her furnature. Hurrah, thought Sharon. Until she got a very large and cumbersom (but very nice) desk stuck half way in the door. It has gone in but now it won't come out again. It would seem that this phenomenon is not limited to sofas as the last I heard she was clambering over the thing to get in and out of the appartment. She also has a slight problem with vertigo from sleeping more than three inches above the floor on a proper bed.

If anyone out there is from St Louis she has declared a wish to marry anyone remotley friendly - I think that may just be the hysteria talking 'though.