h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Entry: - A60490000
Author: Textbook Chaos - U14240159

I hope this is'nt too depressing

No, I like it. That's tellin' 'em.

One small question: I would think it was 'lent ears'. Maybe somebody else knows if 'lended' is possible?

There's some good imagery in here but I think it needs a bit of clarification.

I see the first two lines as an effective image of a depressed person,
but why are digits 'Wrapped around my vices like serpent's tongues'?

In the second stanza, I wondered what the oceans were meant to be: emotions, events, fate?.

I think the last stanza provides a good contrast between the shackled, helpless depressed person and the comfortable 'flesh and blood'.

I hope I'm on the right lines and haven't completely misinterpreted your intentions

Poetic license?

Heavy stuff, this, but I like it.

yeh i wrote lent first of all then changed it to lended as i felt it worked better. i don't know if this will make any sense but in my head i think that 'lent' sounds like you gave something away recently and you will get it back soon from a reliable friend. where as 'lended' sounds more like something has been given away with little chance of getting it back.

you're right though lended is not a proper word, perhaps i'll change it to "loaned out" sound good?

Well, yes, why not? Btw, just for my understanding: do you mean ocean's lap (two nouns (sg)) or oceans lap (one noun (pl), one verb)?

hey minorvogonpoet.
thank you so much for reading my poem. and also taking the time to interpret it's meaning.

the poem is about trying to be a good person but constantly making the wrong choices, being influenced by the wrong people, addictions.

the canvas is a young child

I believe we are both the canvas and the artist in life.

i just hope we can paint a pretty picture

hey B'elana

looking back i did make a mistake there. it is supposed to be noun and then a verb you are correct. wrote it this morning after thinking a lot on the subway , must have still been asleep when i was writing! i see you've been to a h2g2 meet? what are they like??

Thanks for the clarification!

Maybe the last line of the first stanza should read:
'wrapped around my will like serpent tongues'.
I think that would make the meaning clearer.

Oh, no problems, it's just because they both evoke different images, so I thought I'd ask.

I've posted to your PS (the Ace's welcome) to answer your question.