h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I think perhaps a syntactical realignment might rectify the offensive impression.

dmitrigheorgheni is standing in the middle of the roman Colosseum. the tiers are filled with standing ramrod straight clones of a greysuited long faced rock solid member of the literate community. instead of suit shirts, they wear white teeshirts with the one word, ook, printed on them.
dmitrigheorgheni opens his mouth. dmitrigheorgheni says:

"I think perhaps a syntactical realignment might rectify the offensive impression."

In unison, every jaw in the crowd drops. every jaw drops slowly... like a dollop of taffy off of its stirring spoon. every jaw drops slowly until it reaches the ground. where it stops dropping. every clone's face looks like an open nutcracker. like a fully extended monkey wrench. like the shadowy space between two columns of the Parthenon.

silence ensues.
you could hear a pin drop if a pin were to drop.
and you most certainly could hear it land.
a pin drops.
a pin lands.
earthquake.
crack of lightning strike as
thousands of jaws snap shut unisonant.
the clones shift. the clones move. stepping and weaving amongst each other, still ramrod straight, the clones find new positions in the stands then stop. realigned. reassigned. reconsigned.

sorry.... that just came to me when i read what you said dmitrigheorgheni.
and i had to write it down before i lost it.
and then i thought it would be a waste to not share it.

okay... and i have to confess... that i have been listening to Pink Floyd for the last 10 hours.

and i watched this twice in a row....

interstellar overdrive part 1 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2iA7wdO00VI&mode=related&search= with syd barret
interstellar overdrive part 2 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3LvkjqkAgsE with syd barret

I recommend black coffee,

a banana,

and possibly group therapy.

(Sorry for the on-again, off-again, at the moment I have computer problems.)

I'm sorry, dmitrigheorgheni, but I must take issue with your denouncement of the Librarian's poetic expression as offensive. Strong language, I agree, and forcefully stated, to be sure. But offensive? No. Rather it is the passionate locution of a truly great ape.

The Librarian's imagery is evocative, even provocative. His words tantilize, arouse, titillate. Such phrases as "OOK ookOOK ookOOK ookOOK. OokOOK ookOOK ookOOK," are intended to thrill. And as for "Ooooooooo ooooooooK," if it offends, then it offends the way all great poetry offends, by shattering our complacency, shaking us to the core with powerful language. I find the line "Ooooooooo ooooooooK" reminiscent of a line in Walt Whitman's Song of Myself:

"I too am not a bit tamed,
I too am untranslatable,
I sound my barbaric YAWP over the roofs of the world."

ook ook

I will admit the Whitmanesque aspect of this work had not occurred to me.

I must re-read and reflect.

. .. . . perusing the Whitman poems. ... .

ookookookookookook. .. .. . .ookookookookookook

!!

'I sing the body electric' is possibly numinous, when one considers the effect of static on creatures with profuse body hair...

(Rubbing with dryer sheets works wonders.)