h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Entry: Battle Creek, Michigan (Cereal City) - A1297235
Author: Zotiel R. Bell - U239956

Of course I'm the one to submit it for review, I'm the one that wrote it. I guess I like the unknown, the fear of rejection that looms until the submission is either liked or shunned further into the backwaters of the guide.

I first emailed it to a few friends who helped a bit, but said that overall it was worth the read...then again, they all live in Cereal City, so the biased humor contained within ignited their funny-bone, where it might not even spark any interest to those outside of Southwest Michigan.

This is my first attempt at a guide entry, and I am currently working on a more truthful entry on Battle Creek, but this one, although, not based upon any truth is how a lot of the people in this town actually believe.

I've babbled long enough...
-Zot

I like this version.

I'll be honest - I thought this was a wind up! "W.K. Kellogg International Airport" Come on! I thought, and ran a google search .

The Battle Creek statistics from Wikipedia will be forgotton in five minutes, but the cereal battles of cereal city I'll remember .

I have a vague memory of a box of 'Post Toasties', would that be one of the Post co's cereals?

The only thing that restricts this from going into the actual edited guide *IS* the talk of battles...kelloggs really does run this town! When they say jump the chamber of commerce asks how high, and the mayor apologizes that they did not ask fast enough.

Wikipedia, yeah...that's why it's outsourced (though, I'm making an editable version with the same info)

Yeah, 'Post Toasties' are from Post...they were originally called ‘Elijah's Manna.’ if you can believe that.

I'm not aware of companies 'running' towns like that over here but I should imagine it happens. And I can see just such a situation developing with a small town not far from here where there's a very large site being developed by an international company and the town has no other major employer. There may be yoghurt wars to come...


‘Elijah's Manna.’ really!
I can't remember what they tasted like but I think they weren't a bad substitute for kellogs. They were many many times better than the other substitutes that appeared on the supermarket shelves.

I suppose the Bourneville factory (which is located in Bourneville near Birmingham, a factory town which was built by cadbury) has a pretty firm grip on the town and I think it is still the biggest employer thereabouts.

There are probably others in the UK but none I can think of offhand.

I'm not sure where ya are from, though, I'd suspect someplace that is not the GRAND U. S. of A! *snicker* Companies here run all sorts of things, the government is just one of them.

I tried to find a link of all 160 countries that Kellogg's holds companies in, but only found an email form. But I did find their page fer England (http://www.kelloggs.co.uk/).

and I'd guess their plant there is in the ghetto...as this is a quote from their page:

"Kellogg's European HQ in Trafford may have Trafford Town Hall and Old Trafford Cricket Ground as its neighbors, but it is no more than a mile from some of the most disadvantaged communities in England."

If they do not sponsor the depraved to start gangs that can assist them in wresting control of the local gov't in Trafford, then I'm not entirely sure of the economic standings of any country but my own.

I'll keep looking though...maybe I can get some collaboration on this let the world know just how much of the world that this cereal company controls.

-Zots

Trafford for you http://www.manchester2002-uk.com/towns/trafford1.html, borough of England's 2nd (?) city. They share an industrial park with the likes of Ford and ICI, so they've got some competition for their take over of the townhall!

Good luck with the cornflake conspiracy research.

It doesn't look like you're still around, Zoitel, but this has been noticed and I'd like to use it for an issue of the CAC-Continuum, which is an effort to promote pieces like yours. You can see the issue in progress at A2201897

If you have some objections, holler at me and I'll try to resolve it.

I went from checking the place daily, to checking it weekly, now I get in only rarely...but I do send people over. This is a great site, and I'm glad that I could contribute to it.

I'd give you permission ot use it, but a) I don't really think ya need it (but thanks fer asking) and b) I see you've already used it

So we can or cannot use it?

We haven't really used it yet though. That's a draft of what I'd like to put together.

Use it, use it...please do...I'm glad ya like it

if I end up writing new one's use those too...as long as I'm getting credit, then it's all good & swell.

*likes to see other people type his name*