h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Entry: Environmental Litigation in the Galaxy - A Timely Report - A4412639
Author: dmitrigheorgheni - U1590784

A well-reasoned and insightful contribution to the current legal debate surrounding NASA.

A NASA Spokesperson responds:

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
Contact: Someone with an important title at NASA or JPL

While it is clearly not the usual policy of this administration to comment upon pending court cases or potentially inflammatory statements made by Russian astrologers, we will make an exception in this case in an effort to nip the output of the intergalactic rumour mill in the bud.

It is our considered opinion that the lawsuit in question is baseless, unfounded and devoid of the universally recognized ‘leg to stand on’ legal requirement. In addition to the much publicised years’ of technological, logistical and mechanical planning that went into the recent Comet Cracker mission, an even more considerable (albeit less well reported) amount of astrological planning was undertaken.

In fact, more than two dozen independent Master Astrologers (and one dubious Palm Reader & Crystal Ball Gazer from Dubai) were commissioned to plot the horoscope of Temple 1. The resulting charts, which were analyzed and compared under the watchful eye of representatives of the AAAS and the international accounting firm of Ramshackle, Tribblehorn, Grimble and Blum, were found to indicate without exception (although there was a bit of uncertainty expressed by the Dubai palmist) that the comet’s collision with the Deep Impact probe was, in fact, ‘written in the stars.’

We did our due diligence. And we have the emails to prove it.

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This is awesome. Good work, sir.

Thank you, thank you!

On the NASA question: I'd advise you to save those emails, as questions will no doubt be asked in numerous parliaments before the comet-dust settles.

But I appreciate the update!