h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Entry: A Jewish Christmas - A3460015
Author: MrRollyPollyCat - U887838

A bit less than timely, but hopefully still entertaining.

they are bad Jews >> may need clarifying

"Our dirty little secret about Chanukah, it's our most worthless holiday of them all."

Doesn't make sense as a sentence. May just need an "is" inserted.

"We have a holiday where we build little shacks and sleep in them"

Footnote to say that the celebration is Sukot? It is Sukot right?

"...other God intervened or: it's the new year..."

What's the : for?

at 2000>> at 2000 years old


"As much as Christians seem to want to deny it,"

NOT a good sentence to be putting around. Perhaps "As much as many Christians appear to want to deny it,"
or something. You can't generalise all Christians together.

agravation>> aggravation


There are a LOT of short unstructured sentences here. I understand that you've written it in a conversational style but I think that by making full, proper sentences you could probably make this into a very nice piece. Unfortunately currently it reads a little like a random rant against Christmas around Jews.

I don't think it reads like that at all. (a rant)

I also quite like the way it's written - as Kat says, it gives it a chatty style.

Thought the best bit was the description of the various Jewish holidays.

My personal take on xmas is that way before the Christians got to the UK, my ancestors were celebrating the beginning of the end of winter by feasting and lighting fires and whatnot.

So I don't see why I should stop just because some some saints came over in a boat, smashed up the heathen icons and introduced some new fangled traditions (cunningly, at the same time as the existing ones).



sprout