h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Entry: Cheese Footballs - A87796778
Author: Icy North - U225620

Greetings, peer reviewers.

Comments and suggestions welcome, but please don't ask for *too* much more detail - there's not a lot out there.

I do have a photo which I can send. Let me know if you need it.

Icy

*waves *

hi.....all photos greatfully accepted!

Rosie

I don't know "cheese footballs" (and they don't sound like something I would enjoy eating...) but I enjoyed the Entry!

In your paragraph about the takeovers and mergers, I noticed you didn't include mention that United Biscuits was bought out in 2000 by a consortium including Nabisco, which is quite interesting given that Nabisco already had links to the product.

I lost touch with the goings on of UB after that, but I see from the internet that they were taken over again in 2006.

I guess UB just retained the Jacobs brand during those two times, so it didn't affect the footballs, but anyway - it is something I know, and wondered about when I read the Entry, so you could add something, or not.

For an international audience could you maybe say that they are like Cheetos (brand name) but round?

They are certainly not Wotsits!

Hi Icy

My late husband, being a child of the 70s, could not possibly consider Christmas complete without buying some Cheese Footballs.

Nobody ate the things. But they acted as a sort of lucky talisman to the whole shebang.


You're correct, not only did they have little culinary merit, they had little actual food content - well food as you'd commonly consider it. As far as I remember the outer wafer case was the most nutritious, the inner cheese stuff must have been dreamt up by a sadist.

I didn't know about the tins. If only we had some - sorry.

I have, apon reading this, a strange, vague, yet pervasive organaleptical-physiological recollection of having eaten these.... and its not quite a strong enough recolection to recall wheather or not it is a plesent taste/smell/texture or not

Seems to end a wee bit abruptly.... Any use/need to include a list of what they actually contain, ingredient wise, and/or, revelation to the ultimate question one's mind throws up, on reading it, as to whether, or not, they actually* contain any* actual* cheese?

Cheesy footballs! Food of the gods. Well. Food of the gods who are having some self-respect problems.

They are not at all like Cheetos, or Wotsits, they are like this:

http://bit.ly/Zlrtz4

Whether or not they contain real cheese is irrelevant. They taste of cheese footballs. That is all you know, and that is all that you need to know.

Food of the gods who are having some self-respect problems. <<<


Your photo reminded me that they do have a use after all. But not in the victualling sense. They were used as impromptu blow footballs. Drinking straws provided the puff, and the goal posts made from the cruet sets. No real rules. As many footballs in play as was felt necessary at any one time. A foul was possible, if your opponent ate the ball.

I am carrying the candle for your late husband Lanza. I also have to buy some cheese footballs every Christmas, and set them out in little glass trays when guests are expected.

I don't know if studies have been done on this, but I reckon that whatever is in them could help with weight loss. Eat one: ooh yum I'll have another of those. Eat two: yes that's okay. Pick up the third: actually I'll just put that back where it was.

I found an own-brand version, of something which sounded about teh same as these, on teh interwebs... I looked at the ingredient list... I looked at teh ingredient list again I then noticed, a 100G portion of them, has more calories than an average chicken Biriani I cook at home...
And, to think... I could have sworn, having teh word 'football' in the name, they'd be some kind of healthy food for sporty types

The word 'cheese' did appear in the list of ingredients, but it was used in the kind of back-handed, reluctant sneaky way, which makes me thin, that actually, if indeed they did mean to have the word 'cheese' on teh ingredient list, it was only there in a kind of vague sense of something not entirely unlike cheese... 'flavouring', or 'essence' seemed popular terms too, though teh allergy warning did give the exciting glimmer of hope, as it warned about milk.... but milk does not equal cheese, in the same way horse does not equal burger... apparently

Great feedback - thanks! This is why we have Peer Review

I'll look into the UB/Nabisco deal later.

I'll also add something on blow cheese football, and credit you for that important nugget of research, Lanzababy



I've not had Cheetos, so I can't confirm whether or not they are similar. Can someone describe a Cheeto to me?

Icy

thanks Icy - a titbit of immortality, in such as cheesy thing! He'd have been thrilled, this would be just the silly stuff he'd love to be remembered for.

This entry - as is usual with Icy's entries - brought a smile to my face. Like 2legs, I have a vague memory - it's of something chewy and salty which you do keep eating, but regret it after each one has been popped in the mouth. I didn't realise they were limited to Christmas. A google search for cheese footballs also reveals that the interweb is populated with individuals with a similar form of this nostalgia.

Changes made, thanks all

I couldn't find anything else worth adding about United Biscuits and Nabisco.

... and photo submitted

Any room for mention of their huge calorific content (admitidly I only found the calories per 100G for the supermarket own brand version of them... whcih I'm guessing as the name is simular, are actually about* the same thing) a 1 LB bag of them, oughta provide sufficient calories to keep an adult male alive for about a week, according to what I saw

I've mentioned that, thanks 2legs

Oops... having already read it, on the second read-through (just before I posted that), I didn't notice No wonder I'm so useless at proof-reading

No, I mean I've just changed it. It wasn't there before!

I spotted it this time