h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

You sure do have a lot to learn YK!! If you want the aformentioned
maybe just trawl along the top shelves of your local news shop....I am sure that you will find what you are looking for there....certainly not in here!
shazzPR

And if you can't reach ask for a ladder...

LOL...and failing that....ask your mummy!
shazzPR

I wonder if, with YKs level of current savoir faire, his mummy is actually willing to give him sex ed. Any comments, YK?

I love it!!
shazzPR

Sex ed from YK's mother...

This is getting REALLY bizarre.

(and lovin' it)

Shazz, kinda guessed you were from the old country - look on the bright side, at least you get the warm & fuzzies from a postcard Christmas.

Christmas in Sydney is usually hot & sticky (sultry sounds nicer) but for som odd reason, we usually sit down for the traditional roast turkey dinner, although recently that tradition is dying off in favour of fresh seafood & lighter foods & salads etc.

Saffire, which part of the eastcoast? up or down?.

I've always fancied visiting the New England area. California doesn't grab me though, we have something similar called Surfer's Paradise.

Well, aren't we the cosmop allovertheplace lot?
Myself, I'm currently gazing out over the sleet-swept streets of Amsterdam, right around noon. 'Tis where I live, and where I hang my hat and rest my rump.

YK: here are your tits, throw in some naughtybits and I am currently dying to hear what bizarre creature can be the result of myst getting complicated with mellonland. I can hear them now... Maybe we could get Lucy Lawless to star in a flic with myst and mellonland. Of course, first we'd have to know what in tarnation is a myst, or a mellonland.

This researcher hails from Utah, The Land behind the Zion Curtain.

Video games, Prez, video games.

At age thirteen I was heavily into the opposite sex (or trying to be) video games were only as complicated as Galaga (remember that one).

I would have though living in Amsterdam would have been a buzz, what with your local cultural attractions. I know what sleet is all about, I grew up in Hull, just across the water. Sleet city here we come.

Never much of a fan of Xena, I much prefer Gabrielle (look into those eyes)

Zion curtain eh??

Not sure where to go with that.

Other than tornadoes, wot's Utah got??

Ummm, Zion Curtain refers to the fact that Salt Lake city UT is the headquarters for the Mormon church. It is something of a regional joke I admit.

Oh and BTW The tornado that we had this summer is a rare fluke. This was the only one in recorded history in the valley.,

Yup,
We got mormons over here too. (although locally, the second 'm' is silent). Gee, I guess you never heard that one before.

Closest I've ever been to Utah is FedEx-ing laserdiscs outta Georgia, and fer sum reason they go to a distribution hub in Utah before leaving the US I believe.

Anyway, we got us kangaroos !

new england- i suppose its nice ... its got its own charm...but im a little tired of it all.
ive always wanted to visit amsterdam and australia and the wildwildwest...whats it like there?
-saffire
ps. i suppose i should put something in here about sex... well... i found an envelope full of poems on my car windshield today...it was from a ---dare i say it--- "secret admirer" ... i think its a joke my friends are playing on me... but damn those poems were a wee bit *erotic*

I *swear* it wasn't me.

"It Hurts"

You probably can't imagine
It's as simple as can be
This place is rather private
The players he and she

She whispered "Will it hurt?"
"Of course not," he replied
"It's a simple project,
lay back and close your eyes."

She said "I'm rather frightened,
I've never done this before."
He wanted to continue
It wouldn't hurt much more

"It's becoming rather painful,"
As tears rolled down her eyes,
"It's hurting something awful,
It must be quite a size!"

"Calm yourself, my darling,
As the feeling holds your spine,
Open up more slightly
So I can get more inside."

Suddenly with a jump
She gave a little shout
Now that it was over
He slowly pulled it out.

If you read this carefully
A dentist chair you'll find
It's not what you were thinking
It's just your dirty mind!

3

Do Share Saffire dearest, do share....

There is a young girl called Saffire,
Who has set my heart a-fire
She lives in the states
And that really grates,
Cos' I'm over here in Australire (sorry)

Australia's great!, land mass the size of continental U.S., population of 18million (lots of space if you want it). Something like 80% of the land mass is desert, the population is 95% urban, the majority in state capitals, all of which are on the coast and have a river flowing through (Aus is also the driest continent, if you don't count Antarctica). Weather is tropical in the north, down to cold & miserable in the far south. I'm in the middle, east coast - but that's the Pacific, not the Atlantic.

The English say it's terribly Americanised, the Americans think it's so quaint & English. The Irish just love the place because a) the get laid really easily, b)there are a lot of Irish pubs here and c)beer is cheap and plentiful.

We have a very rich culture, in fact some of the world's finest yoghurts can be found here. Our national dish is a meat pie (small, full of gravy, served hot with a cold beer.

Have a look at A193303 - I haven't looked too closely, but it looks worthwhile.

Most importantly, we don't take ourselves too seriously!


P.S. car eh? have to try that one!

Why don't you declare "I am an Australian...!" at http://www.h2g2.com/forumframe.cgi?forum=23614&thread=24752

Cold? It's 34 deg and humid as hell in Melbourne tonight. Two years ago we had a higher avg temp over summer than Broome.....Cold & miserable.....