h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Hello Sarah

I was out of communication with the rest of the world today (modem problems) so I have only just had a chance to read through today's contributions to MC and QQ.

Blimey, that discussion on paedophelia. I was amazed and encouraged by the standard of debate involved. I didn't realise that I was surrounded by such intelligent, well-informed people. It was quite humbling in a way. I'm glad I was off line otherwise I would have felt like joining in and would have made an utter prat of myself... I think I'm better off with the chocolate-and-Chelsea's-legs scenario.

That's all for now.
Live long and prosper.

Peter

(Look at me, I'm using smilies!)

Hi Peter,

I have been out of communication - during the day - due to pressures of work! Not a state of affairs that I am used to, as I usually paint like a demon all winter in order that I may enjoy the summer sun. But the last year has been a bit of a funny one and I have not been able to prepare my stock so that it can withstand the onslaught of the demands of the great British public!

I don't think we should worry about the standard of debate at all - though it was the first time I had put my oar in on anything that wasn't flippant - but I suppose I don't often have anything serious to say - life itself seems to take care of that side of things!

And to get to more serious things - I feel I may have gone a bit far with the man on the end of each leg - but then - truth is always stranger than fiction - and it truly was most innocent..I am listening to Midsomer Murders at the moment - I saw this one the first time and it's not very good - my daughter has just got the lastest vids of Buffy - and they are MUCH better - I need to have things to listen to when I am painting - I have to say this lot are much more gruesome than previous ones - I am cooking spaggetti Bol...can't sp the rest,at the moment, and I am not too keen on eating it as the first episode was all about a burger bar and the mince and the mincer and missing persons and ....uuuugh!!!! That should give you food for thought!

Bye, Sarah

I have not had time to investigate the smiley options - in a couple of weeks time things should calm down a bit here (that is really tempting fate!).

Good evening Sarah

Don't tell anyone this but I'm a closet Buffy fan, which at the age of 47 is a bit sad. It had to come out sometime. I think it has some of the sharpest scriptwriting on TV. (Sad, sad, sad) I even know which episode you're talking about!

I was at (on? in?) the Radio 4 message boards in general this evening and you could tell that people were going away for the weekend as the contributors slowly slipped away until there was only Stevan and I left, trotting around the MBs leaving subversive little notes all over the place. Great fun

I've started a new Holiday Special MC for the weekend. Will anyone call in, I ask myself. Tomorrow we shall see!

Enjoy the Bank Holiday

TTFN
Peter

What a relief - we can all come out of the closet!

We have all the Buffy's, and my youngest even knows the scripts off by heart! I am still only half way through the latest series. Poor Spike - though I am not sure what he sees in Buffy - because she seems strangely lacking in sex appeal as well as the best lines - Anya seems to get all of that - maybe she (the actress- I DO know it's not real - I think!)is canoodling with Joss Whedon.

I am trying to steer her away from Angel - we have been lent Series 2 - and I love it - but want her to wait for Christmas before she acquires Series 1 & 3. Instant gratification seems to be the name of the game with my lot - and I have to put up a bit of a fight sometimes!

I totally agree about the script writing - absolutely brilliant - I read somewhere recently that it is being used in schools.

As it is raining, I shall take a flit through the MB's

bye S

Good afternoon Lady Scarlet

Re Angel: I do believe you have a treat in store. In my humble opinion Angel Series 3 is the best yet.

Conversely I felt that the latest Buffy series was far too serious and unendingly tragic. I kept on shouting "lighten up, for god's sake!" at the screen.

For examples of some of the best quotes from all the series, hundreds can be found at uk.imdb.com (no www in the front), enter Buffy The Vampire Slayer TV Series in its search engine and then, on the Buffy page, click on "memorable quotes" on the left-hand side.

Two of my favourites:

Buffy (finding Spike hiding behind a tree): What are you doing here? In five words or less.
Spike (counting on his fingers) Out....for...a....walk....bitch


Cordelia: So does looking at a gun make you want to have sex?
Xander: I'm seventeen. Lookinging at linoleum makes me want to have sex.


Would this be a good time to talk about Star Trek? No, I thought not!

Bye for now

Peter

AH HA! Glad to hear that we have treat in store - will make me all a-quiver for the next 3 months!

I have just completed the Buffy fest. and agree with you entirely. Lacking the 'fun' of the earlier ones - actually Riley got my back up - and I thought all was definitley tailing off from that point on.
As for him turning up, last night, with a wife...NO..Please...but at least that got him off the Buffs back.

I did not actually watch the bit when Warren got 'skinned'? that's what my daughter said happened - in some distress - and said she would never forget it - so fast forward was in order for me - i want to faint at the slightest mention of the red fluid - so why I am so into Buffy? I have no idea!

The thing that has bothered me most about the latest series is the dentistry! Buffy, Anya and Willow have all been sent to the same happy clappy dental expert and have WWHHIITTEE TEEEETH! They gleam unaturally in a menacing way from between their soon to be enhanced lips and make me thankful that my absolute cowardice will ensure that I NEVER try and keep back the ravages of time in such a way. Have you also noticed that the Buffster is definitely on the verge (well actually, in the grip) of anorexia? Like the McBeal, there is a noticable decline in looks in later episodes.

The lino quote is a much loved one! - but will check out the site for more gems.

STAR TREK? - I loved it, and I still enjoy the next generation - but am not fanatical about it! and don't know when it's on tv, so am no where near as familer with it as I am with the inhabitants of Sunnydale!

Me man is back for his supper - 11.30! the norm! at this time of year.
So - I'm off to dish up the chicken tikka ...

Sarah

Hi S

I find that when I'm justifying my enjoyment of "Buffy" and "Angel" to people who say, "That's kid's TV" or worse "That's teenage girl's TV" I am usually talking to people who have never watched it. It is hard to explain the attraction of the format (Especially as I don't like "teen movies".) The only way to get my point across is to sit them down and actually force them to watch an episode and see for themselves what sometimes breathtakingly witty scripts and intelligent plots they have.

I think Buffy herself trying to rationalise her passion for and, at the same time, disgust with Spike was a very adult theme that very few television programmes would want or be able to tackle.

BTW I have only ever watch BTVS and Angel on Sky One and Beeb Two (not on video/dvd) where scenes like the flaying of Warren are usually edited for tender young eyes. But he had to die horribly - he'd murder the love of Willow's life after all.

(Warning! This posting might ramble about a bit. It's Sunday morning and I had a bad night, not much sleep...no particular reason. So I'm chatting really, rather than holding a grown-ups conversation!)

Re: Star Trek. I never really liked the Original Series back in the sixties so I didn't catch the Next Generation until the repeats started rolling around - and then I got hooked. The Next Generation has yet to be topped, but I always enjoyed Deep Space Nine, Voyager coming in third place. I reserve judgement on Enterprise for a while. I've seen all of the first series on Sky and it seems to have promise.

Have you heard the definitions of each series?

Star Trek: To boldly go where no man has gone before
Star Trek TNG: To boldly go where every man has gone before
Star Trek DS9: To boldly stay where they are
Voyager: To boldly go home

Any ideas for Enterprise? (To boldly go where no man has gone before, before the man who boldly went there later?)

It's raining here in Reading at the moment. This is traditional for the Reading Festival weekend. I've never known it to fail, even back in the seventies when I used to go.
The first year I went (1973), the headlining bands were Rod Stewart and the Faces, Genesis and Rory Gallagher. Status Quo, Alex Harvey Band and Thin Lizzy were way down the bill and Sunday afternoon was the jazz and folk section. The ticket for the whole weekend was £5.50 which worked out at 18p per band! -and you tell that to the kids today....

See? What did I tell you? a rambling Sunday morning chat which has now come a close.

Enjoy the rest of the bank holiday

Peter

Hello Sunday Ramblin' Peter,

It's OK to ramble - that what this is for - isn't it?

I have just taken a break from doing the only bit of housework I have done all summer! - it is definitely a human activity that is a waste of time - as you keep having to do it again and again - or in my case, once in a while! Does Captain Kirk get his feather duster out? I don't think so!

We don't have any digital thingies like Sky - my lot watch too much telly as it is! But we have a lot of videos because reception down here is VERY bad - I need to put a wacking great pole on the cliff top if things are to improve - and I don't think it would look very nice so we have a good selection of vids to keep us quiet when required.

Sorry you had a bad night - have to say mine was not great either - I dreamt about my mother a lot - people seem to dream a lot here - must be something in the sea air.

Reading in 1973 - I was 13 and at boarding school and hating it! I have never been to a festival - and it will probably stay that way - as that much humanity up close is my idea of hell! I love to see it all on tv - but the thought of those overflowing porter loos is enough to ensure that I will never embarrass my daughters by wanting to tag along with them! - my eldest keeps saying she's off to Glastonbury or Reading - but hasn't made it yet. There you are, I have had a ramble too.

Back to getting clean duvet covers onto duvets - now there is a job i hate...but looking forward to Scream 2 later...

Bye

Sarah

Hello Sarah

Well, the rock festival's over and the sun has come out! I'm sure there's a local bye-law about this somewhere.

Reading Bye Laws
Section 1869, Subsection 10b.

The last weekend of August (known hereafter as the "August Bank Holiday" or ABH) will be wet and cold. This is regardless of the weather preceeding and following said weekend. Although, if possible, the week preceeding will feature torrential rain for at least forty-eight hours to make the site nice and muddy.
Strong winds are optional during the ABH but recommended, to blow over badly secured tents and send the sound of the music away from the site and towards nearby residential areas.
The fireworks on Saturday night should go off at the wrong time and drown out the top of the bill act and wake up the whole of the town.
Rubbish must not be left on the site but taken away by the festival goers to be strewn along the route from the site to the station.

I'm sure that is all written down somewhere!

By the way, is it safe to talk? Your daughter hasn't confiscated the computer or barred you from going near it, has she? If it's only the MC board she's told you not to visit, we can get around that. I'll repeat all the salient bits here until your exile is over. A "Best of MC" if you like.

My weekend was fairly uneventful. I actually got out of the house on Sunday night! A have one of those shopping buggies you see advertised during the breaks on Countdown that are aimed at OAPs. I went down to a couple of our local pubs with the family. That's the advantage of living in the middle of Reading, (the only advantage probably) that everything is nearby and all the pavements have drop kerbs for us don't-walk-wells.

Well, the US Open tennis is about to start on sky sports so I'll be off now.

"See" you soon

Peter

SHE's in the bath - 3.00! She can talk! So Im checking in!

She is concerned because the Master Mage keeps ringing - and I KNOW -I shouldn't have given out my number - but I didn't - it must have been a 1471

from his webwsite: www.magicisfun.com

- the odd short call is nice but I am up to my eyes in stuff at the moment,and I only ever use the phone to get or impart info - I am not particularly female in that respect - to me the telephone is an outrageous intrusion into what little time one has - sp. as I work all hours,at home - that's why I love e-mail - as it you who decide if you can take the time out to do it.

I am glad to hear you have one of those zippy motor things - I am trying to persuade my pa that he should have one - I'm a little green-eyed myself as I live on a cruel hill and am not too keen on the walk to get the paper.

She's out of the bath! Better be off!

Sarah

Hello Sarah

How's things? Hard at work?

I'm with you on the telephone thing. My reasons are slightly different though; email is so much cheaper!

Here's a joke for you that made me chuckle.

Two atoms are walking down the road. One says, "I think I've lost a neutron" His friend says, "Are you sure?". He feels himself up and down, "Yes, I'm positive"

What's happening in Reading today, then. The buggy's ready to go. It's been on charge all night. I'm off to visit an old mate for drinks and tv today. A couple of bottles of wine and the tennis on Sky.
Nice.


Later, dude

Peter

Tennis and wine - what a treat - what tennis is happening now? - something from some far flung part of the world - somewhere where there is sunshine! We have had some this a.m. but all is cloud now.

I have been up v. bright and early (largley due to nightmares about one of my neighbours, who has been trying to chop down 3 of my huge ash trees on our boundary ever since he moved in here a few years ago - I dreamt he wanted to open a casino! - not too far fetched I fear - he has delusions of grandeur and clients in Dubai he needs to impress - he's certainly not impressing me - though he would like to - and that might be part of the problem!).

You are getting so cool with your smiley stuff - I am going to have to investigate the possibilities soon....ish!

We've had to return our Angel vids today - so I'm feeling that they are the ONLY things I want to watch! But I'm dog sitting for a friend, so will put my best foot forward instead.

I like your neutron joke - I shall pass it on - maybe I'll get a reaction! - (does that work? - I am a girl - I don't do science stuff).

I'm going to have a glass of wine now - and ponder the wisdom of getting some housework done whilst there is cloud!

Have fun,
Sarah

Hey dude!
(Sorry about that, I've been chatting with some of our younger American cousins on another "conversation")

What tennis??!!? Only the US Open, that's all! The last of this year's grand slams. Young Timmy Henman is due on court at 4pm our time to get beaten - I mean - play his second round match. How can I tell that you're not a big tennis fan?

What do you think of the new subject I started on MC this morning? (Just for you!) I thought some of the boards were starting to get far too sensible.Time to get out the "Uncensored A-Z of London"

I was just about to mention the weather here in Reading, but I was reminded of Tony Hancock's "The Radio Ham" where he gets through to someone unintelligable in Japan every night and the conversation never gets beyond "It is raining in Japan" - or something like that.

'Later dude

Peter

Hey Dude!

I can do teenage/surfer/skate-boardie speak too! - my eldest is one such!

Actually, I am more of a tennis 'player', rather than a fan! I used to have seats at CC, Wimbeldon in days of yore (courtesy of a kind godfather) - mid '70's. I grew up playing tennis everyday (grass-court only - I have never really liked hard/clay) and was not too bad(taught by a family friend who played at Wimbeldon himself, decades ago), but now Life has changed and I have not served an ace in a year or two. The result is that I don't follow any of it now... a shame - but I dream of being able to rig up a system whereby I can watch Wimbeldon and sunbathe AND paint - all at the same time!...a few beach umbrellas and a bit of extra cable...

Is it raining in Reading as well as Japan. The mist is still creeping in here.

I am dog sitting for my neighbour - I took her (the dog!)out last night, along the cliff top, torch-lit, and knew just what I should NOT step in this morning!...YES! I did... oh well...it helps put the delights of getting another dog of my very own, sharply into perspective.

Thank you for my new thread! I will just check on it one more time before I get back to the paintbrush!

Sarah

Hello Sarah

Welcome to the weekend. Weather beautiful today has been. Is this the last gasp of summer?

Torchlit walks along the cliff top and the "creeping mists". You make your life sound very dreamy and romantic. Have you ever considered writing romance novels? Mills and Boone are waiting for you!

The secret with the smileys is not trying to memorise them all. My trick is to remember just one and use it every time (the "big grin") and then when you preview the message you can click on the smiley and see the whole list and change it to whatever you want. Works for me

You're right about tennis payers and tennis watchers. I was always an atrocious player but just knew enough to appreciate good play. Now I'm a "coach potato" (almost literally!) I can watch Hewitt, Roddick, Henman et al play from dawn to dusk - and beyond - and enjoy the excellence of their game. The people I know who play tennis don't have time to watch it on tv.

I think I annoyed Mestingua on the MC poetry strand today. Have you read it? I think it's safe to talk about her here. I can see a bit of a niggle developing. She definitely doesn't like new contributors to "her" message board.

Ah well, back to watching Hewitt against Blake. And time to open another bottle of vino.

Peter

Hi,

I'm back in London - YUK! Have just got in - it was a long drive.

Mills and Boone - at school we used to find them most entertaining and would write rather filthy pastiches - I remember one with Cindarella and a pirate and a parrot... Romantic! Peter, I trod right in the poo!

I am sure Mestingua didn't mean to upset - Maybe us new folk get a bit annoying sometimes - but I'm sure she loves us really.

I got my phone bill today! It has doubled since I started with the message board! I will have to go onto one of those monthly charge things - But I would have to do it x2 because it wouldn't work in London AND Dorset - bit of a bummer - I shall have to do my sums and see if it's worth it. OR, GET A GRIP and not spend so much time online.

I'm off for a lie down now - with a good book and my mosquito bites - which are driving me crazy!

Jack Nicholson has just broken a deer's neck and sucked it's blood - uugh - Spike or Angel would have done it with so much more finesse!

BYE BYE, S.

Just a quicky, Sarah (pant,pant)

I think I've got the phone bill situation sussed.

My modem is on broadband and I pay a monthly flat-rate fee of £14.99 (This ISN'T an NTL ad!) and I stay online 24/7. I don't know who is your line provider in Dorset, ("Line provider"!...I'm starting to sound like Alan) but I know BT and cable companies are all much of a muchness nowadays. And for telephone calls I use my mobile after 7pm and before 8am and get 1000 minutes a month free. I just use my land line for incoming calls.

That means I pay just the £14.99 plus line rental and keep in touch with all you lovely people all the time! Worth investigating. Living on hand-outs from the government I had to.

"Wolf" - great film. Keep up the good watching.

All the best

Peter

Hello Peter,

I am afraid my eyelids grew heavy and I did'nt manage to see the end of the Wolf film - or the end of the chapter of my book! My children are quite used to having to creep in and turn the tv off! I always maintain that a small telly in the bedroom is worth a 1000 sleeping pills!

What I need is a £14.99 deal which is linked to my LAPTOP not my residence - any ideas on that most welcome! I did ask all the right questions at PC world when I bought my current machine - but I was given a Freeserve CD which would (a)not let me register and (b)would not straddle two locations - which was the thing that I had specifically requested! I still have to get me refund.

I have got to start sorting out my pa - who is champing at the bit to be out and about- ie back in his flat in London (SORRY, I forget that you may not know that shortly after my joining the message board, my father had a fall and had to have a hip replacement and is generally pretty frail)- my mother died last November and I think we are still reeling from that - it would have been their 50th Anniversary on 18 Sept - things just don't seem to pan out the way anyone would have thought, - but in no physical shape to be either - I have had news of a male nurse who might be happy to live-in - but I'm crap at doing this interviewing thing - when I had nannies/au pairs for my kids, I always ended up doing all the real work myself - and making sure THEY had a good time!
I have two brothers (i'm in the middle) and they do what they can -but.....!

I had thought that having two daughters (which I have brought up single-handedly for the last 10 years), they might feel that they would like to look after me in my dotage - Not a bit of it! I am assured that I will be despatched to the nearest Nursing Home as soon as they can decently do so! As I stare at the various scallop shells etc that I have to paint today to fund their University careers, I wonder if I should bother! - But of course, I will bother! After all mine did, for me!

Given my latest phone bill, and uni expences looming...my e-mail is: [email protected] - though I am very OK with checking in with h2g2.