h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Y'know these Co-co Pops and Choco Krispies (or is it Choco Pops and Co-co Krispies?) are pretty confused. As a dedicated researcher for HHGG, I have discovered that this cereal is split into two tribes.
Co-co Pops and Choco Krispies have been rivals since the day they were genetically processed. You see it all depends on the type of milk which is placed onto them. For example, if one was to put full-cream milk onto them, it would fill there little holes with a huge
amount of energy bringing them to life. Once they have come to life, the larger puffs of..... whatever, become very agressive and they will think for themselves and they will refuse to be eaten. The smaller bits however, are not as tough and are more politically minded trying to prevent violence and letting fate be fate. Then both tribes have a war because of this disagreement (if you put your ear next to the cereal bowl, you can hear lots of popping - this is the war taking place) and they are all devouered no matter what. The process will not occur though if a weak substance is placed on these tiny warriors such as skimmed milk. They will just sit there waiting to be eaten but they will not - as cereal with skimmed milk tastes BLOODY AWFUL!!!

eating cereal with skimmed milk is like drinking shandy.
and shandy sucks