h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Entry: Surviving Toddler Tantrums - A757668
Author: kinkybunny (keeper of all things perverted) - U195157

Thought this entry might be useful for anyone with small children, at least those who want to insure their sanity doesn't all disappear down the plughole with the bathwater

Hi kinkybunny!

For some reason, some children are worse when they reach the age of three. Mine was.

Ignoring them (I spotted a typo there - you wrote 'egnoring' them) works really well. I remember one time when mine was lying on the floor kicking and screaming and I walked past him and said 'Oh, you're having a tantrum, tell me when it's over'. I did it several times and eventually the tantrum abated. He never did tantrum as badly after that.

Distracting them is also a really good tactic. I don't think you've mentioned that.

It might be a good idea to spell check your entry as I spotted a few other typos.

It might also be good to classify tactics and break the subject up with headers.

THis looks good and informative. Maybe you should break it up with headers? It looks more professional and "finished". Also, exclamation and question marks shouldn't have a space before them.

Nice entry! I approve of everything except offering sweets as a reward. Imo it encourages bad eating habits, but if you want to keep it in, ok.

I tmight be a good idea to mention that if you are ignoring a tantruming child in public, not only do you need a thick skin, you will also need to stop other people trying to talk to your child.
I always end up having this argument with my parents, my kid strops out, and they try to talk him round. I have to tell them to leae him alone! I'm not arguing with a 7 year old, when I've made a decision!

This tactics can be used on a child of any age - including teenagers! (Well, maybe not the finger painting, but the ignoring tantrums works every time!)

I'm aware that it really needs fine tuning and this is my first attempt so I'm really greatful for all comments xx

Ironically, I read this while my little angel was throwing a fit. I gave her 'time-out' in her room, logged onto h2 and had a good laugh at this entry.

I liked it lots.

For a first attempt, it was a good one!



- Jimi X

nice entry

regarding occupation
we have a toy library here, and di when i was but a sproglett. basically you pay a small sum to hire a tou for two weeks and then give it back. this ws great for gimiky toys like marble runa nd barbies this that and the otehr that cost a lot of money but the child does get bored of. and if they dont get fed up then hire it again a few months later.

regarding the screaming tantrum on the floor
a friends of mines grandaughter like this one. my friend got down on the floor with her and screamed too. that shocked the toddler! 'granny' then said "this is what you look like" and did it again. "ridiculous" and then showed her her self in a mirror.
telling her she looks ridiculous apparently does haelp ward off some of the tantrums now, the ones that result mainly fom a fit of temper that is. i dont hink anything can stop the ones that come from utter panic.

FABT

The entry's taking shape.

You will have to amend the bit's of first person stuff as it's not allowed in Edited Guide entries. (eg I got so sick ...)

The 'I hate you' that comes so easily from your little darling is easily countered, as long as you realise that s/he doesn't really mean it and is using it as a weapon. I use 'That's OK, I don't mind' as I know mine is using it to try to manipulate me. Another good one was 'It's your job to make me happy' and I told him that no, it wasn't my job to make him happy, it was my job to keep him safe and to help him grow up into a well balanced person.

Hi KB,

I loved it! You have some very valuable pieces of advice here. And it rings SO true to me at the moment. My boy is nearly 3, but we still feel the effect of Force 9 tantrums about once a day (on average).

You forgot another delightful action - the "running on the same spot" behaviour. Also, the limp action is amazing - you try to pick them up by their arms and they suddenly morph into a loose bag of potatoes - impossible to hold properly!

Sorry, but is there meant to be a comma in the phrase "And they will eventually honest"? Or is it meant to mean something else? You also have missed capitalising some words at the start of sentences.

I'm going to be a bit provocative here, but a slap, used very sparingly and judiciously, may be an answer in some cases. Particularly where the effect of the tantrum might be to cause harm to himself or other people. Some of the toddler management bestsellers also concur with this in very defined circumstances.

I also find that if you bide your time, and wait until you feel the child has most of their energy expended, that an offer of a big hug can bring the child out of their temper immediately, and it might be just what the child needs.

Finally you should mention "time out". Small children are experts in driving their parents ballistic, so if you feel that you are about to lose your temper, the best thing for both of you is to remove the child to a safe place (upstairs in his bedroom, with the door closed but unlocked, is good), and for you to run downstairs immediately afterwards and to make a cuppa for yourself. It does work, so long as you do it suddenly and quickly, and with you (the object of its agression) not there anymore, it can give the child a chance to calm down somewhat.

It's really important that parents get a chance to calm down after an unusually stressful tantrum. Because, like many parents, we are housebound, we have an arrangement where one of us gets away from the house one night a week. Being inside every day is not good for your sanity...

Sorry, these are just some musings and not so much comments on your article - you don't need to add any of them if you don't wish to.

Woodpigeon

having worked for a time in shops where lots of little kids get dragged through periodically i would like top reiterate the point someone made earlier about not bribing them with sweets, as far as i've seen all it does is giv them a sugar rush! not a great help.

the worst kids for tantrums seemed to be already tired....i know often it is unavoidable to take out a tired child so this is not directed at every body, but taking it swimming and then expecting it to have the energy to trail after mummy round M&S patiently waiting while she trys on yet another skirt, would make me have a tantrum let alone a toddler. (and believe me i've seen it done!)

i have to say though, some parents i've seen really treat their kids oddly.

my mum used to make me behave with threats like no tv or things i didnt like for dinner.

A bit of background...
My eldest has driven me mad since the age of about two. I am now in the position of having regained my sanity somewhat and am about to lose it again as my daughter has just turned one. More than anything else, I think I wrote this as a reminder to myself! Thankyou for all the wonderful points, I must admit that bribing my little one with sweets wasn't something I did all that often and maybe I should have clarified that one. Wouldn't want anyone to do it every day so have decided to edit that little gem out. Although I do believe in a parent's right to smack a child under certain circumstances,and have done so myself, I think it is too difficult to prescribe exactly when and where it is appropriate, which is why I haven't included that advice. Everyone's opinion on the matter is different and I respect that.
Many thanks
Heather xx

I dont want to open another can of worms here, but here goes.

Our son, just seven has been hyperactive since age 4 and we have gone for a regime of reducing intolerance to certain foods.
This is done by diet and a " vaccine" to desensitize him to trigger foods.

The reseluts are very good.

Can I suggest you consider diet.
It might just work!

Kinky bunny, ( how can I resist that name )????

Can I get some stuff togther and post it here.

I'd like Linda to look at it as well

You will be amazed!!

Your Guide Entry has just been picked from Peer Review by one of our Scouts, and is now heading off into the Editorial Process, which ends with publication in the Edited Guide. We've therefore moved this Review Conversation out of Peer Review and to the entry itself.

If you'd like to know what happens now, check out the page on 'What Happens after your Entry has been Recommended?' at EditedGuide-Process. We hope this explains everything.

Thanks for contributing to the Edited Guide!

wow. that was quick!

for kinkybunny then!

Cheers!

- X

WOW
Still a bit gobsmacked!
Thanks everyone
My round I think!

xxxxxx

Great stuff, but where was it 2 years ago??

*whispers* BTW: some of the GuideML is showing.