h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

On the way home I was ruminating on the words of the friendlier of the two polis men who buggered up my tuesday. (They do so love to do good cop bad cop don't they?). I mentioned that I tended to assume other road users weren't actually deliberatly trying to kill, they're just incompentent. He said he never made such an assumption, he believed everybody was out to get him.

I thunked, with all the advantages he's got, what chance do I stand? He's got a flashy lighty thing, a shouty noise maker, a glowing jam sandwich, a souped up steel cage (don't tell me Polis vehicles are stock, it's not true). He gets some very good training, as needed, and he's got half a million mates who'll back him up come what may. All of them are armed and dangerous, and a very large amount have pistols, rifles and submachine guns. WTF's he got to worry about?

At least when people try to kill Polis-people they're doing it deliberatly. When they try to kill me it's either stupidity or carelessness. Not that it makes a difference if they get you, but it makes a world of difference when they miss!

Good theory. I've never actually tried to discuss anything with a police officer. I find it's much easier just to smile sweetly and coo a lot.

Just sayng hello.

Being shouted at for potentially having stolen your own bike (go figure!) is one thing, getting nicked for doing pigeon impressions is a totally other kettle of elephants!

I tried smiling sweetly, but the ol' tache gets in the way

H&K
Z

LOL! Clever...

Ahh, that's right. Well then, uhhh... try and buy 'em off. Flash the English equivalent of a dime, and say 'Will this keep ya quiet?'

Hehe!

Uhuh, got anymore bright-spark ideas? Will you fly over & visit me when I get banged up for failing to adequately bribe Polismen?

H&K
Z