h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

To phrase the voice over for the trailer of the 60s film; Dr Who & the Daleks, it makes me wonder that if the Dalek movies had continued, branching onto other avenues, what if... say Peter Jackson had decided to bring Doctor Who to the big screen, which story would you want to see brought to the big screen?

Would you want the feature to be faithful in design? To use the exact script? And who would you cast for the roles?
It could be old series or new but to see a feature-length action-adventure piece, a scary edge-of-the-seat chiller or an epic tale of intrigue and imagination!

If we assume they'd have worked their way through the Dalek's TV adventures, The Chase would have been a hoot. Peter Jackson would have had to tackle The Daleks' Master Plan across three films (or in one bum-numbing 3-hour epic).

Don't you mean a 3 and a half hour epic? And who would you cast in the many roles, would you "re-imagine" the alien worlds of Kembel, Mira and Tigus, not to mention the alien delegates and what of the Daleks themselves...?

Two words...well, one word and an acronym: CGI Daleks.

We know BBC Wales has already done this, to great effect, but to see a company like WETA Digital get hold of them...

Imagine seeing something like The Daleks Invasion of Earth, complete with iconic Dalek trundles out of the Thames and Daleks across Westminster Bridge moments...but with an opening sequence that shows the invasion.

We're talking thousands of Daleks. The shattering impact of nigh-invulnerable death-ray wielding psychotic pepperpots smashing their way into a planet and winning. And then, with humanity in thrall all looking gloomy for the planet, a familiar blue box arrives...

I'd love to know what Tim Burton would do with The Doctor (hehe...can anyone see Johnny Depp in the role?). Or Terry Gilliam, for that matter.

I think that the Mechanoids would have to be quite heavily redesigned in "The Chase" because they were reasonably sophisticated and alien-looking back in 1965, but in the present day I'm not sure if that football-with-flattened-edges-shaped design (strikingly similar to the Nestene energy units I might add) would stand up under scrutiny with today's audiences and expectations. Still, I think their flamethrower weaponry would look quite effective amid the darkness of the Mechanus jungle or the claustrophobic metallic nature of their city.

I actually think that Johnny Depp might not be too bad as the Doctor, because he has the mischievious and crafty face of the Second, Seventh and Tenth Doctors, the physique of the Eighth Doctor and the eccentric nature of the Fourth and Ninth Doctors. I think given the right clothes, a British accent and long dark hair like he had in "Charlie and the Chocolate Factory," he might make quite a good Doctor. I'm not too sure about Tim Burton directing the film though, I think he might put in too much fantasy and not enough science-fiction to allow the film to be accepted by "Doctor Who" fans. I think Joss Whedon, of "Buffy" and "Angel" fame, may do a much better job as science-fiction is his special interest and he did good with "Serenity" last year.

He's very Doctorish in Sleepy Hollow.

You could see what was happening in Sleepy Hollow? You've got better night vision than me, then.

There is a website that hosts remixes of the Who theme.
The reason I was wondering about the Tim Burton possibilities of Who was one remix called "For A Darkened People", which has a strong Danny Elfman influence.

Since Elfman and Burton seem to go well together, it set me wondering what a movie might be like with that kind of partnership.

I'm also wondering what other famous directors might make of Who.
Stanley Kubrick, for one. Or Ridley Scott. Even Woody Allen.

I'm not sure that Kubrick would make much of Who at all...

Just because a man's dead, doesn't mean he can't produce.

Just look at the careers of L. Ron Hubbard and...

...sigh...there's a rapper type person who got shot and is apparently still making records. Apparently quite famous. At least two of the Gradientlings still think he's alive, have therefore made the 'I hope not, he was cremated' joke several times...nope, can't remember it.

Anyway, just because Stanley's a bit deceased it's no reason to rule him out. But let me rephrase. I wonder what Stanley Kubrick would have been will going to have made of Who? (past imperfect future (deceased) tense)