h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I've been neglecting my journal lately and decided tonight to jot a few more stray thoughts down. I am currently dieting, and for those who have gone through this, you know what I'm talking about when I say *please make it stop*! This, undoubtedly, has been the most difficult 5 days I have ever gone through... but I *have* to do this. My health hasn't been optimal lately. I'm tired. I'm out of shape. I can't keep up with my son, not that if I were in *good* shape I'd be able to anyway. I have lower back and joint pain in my ankles. I am basically tired of feeling this way.. and I am determined to do something about it. But it is still quite difficult. I've given up quite a bit in the last 5 days... no caffeine *whatsoever*, no fizzy drinks, no sugar, low fat, low (very low) carbohydrate, high protein, and lots and *lots* of water. I've also been taking nutritional supplements - some digestive enzymes and a multivitamin 2x a day. I've given up alcohol - although I wasn't a terribly big drinker in the first place.. but I have to say SuperBowl Sunday was a lonely place when you're the only one *not* having a brew with the peel and eat shrimpies! *sigh* I've not thrown exercise into the mix quite yet. My body has quite enough to deal with on it's own right now without adding excruciating *pain* as well. I've been experiencing terribly headaches and a longing for a big ol' cup of which was my mainstay for breakfast at work. *heavy sigh* I felt really weak tonight, but trudged through it. It's funny what you feel a necessity, and what your body feels. I *feel* like I need a cup of coffee... but I know my body feels something quite different. It's showing me.. in a *big* way that I really don't need the caffeine.. it's all in my mind. One thing this 5 day experience (and don't think I'm giving up - I'm not... I'm truding through this until I lose the weight I need to... 2 months down I can reward myself once a week - that's something to look forward to ..) has taught me is that my necessities run much deeper than a piece of chocolate cake and a cup of vanilla cappuccino. *ahhh* Support. Love. Friendship. Family. Peace. Calm. Those things I *really* need. I think we *all* need. Tonight I felt weak, and I almost fell off this train I'm on. You know, too early to see what you're working on.. too early to see results and the smell of bread baking... It's tough. I thought of friends I've met and know, here and in RL and their journeys and their battles and how they didn't give up. I became stronger. I know I can do this. I know I can overcome this. I know I can do what I've set out to do. Tonight, I just may sleep better than I have in a long time.

*feeling supported, supportive and loved* and to all!
WINK

s back!

Good luck!

s to you too.
*and thanks*

WINK