h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Oh dear, oh dear! Let down yet again by the batteries; never mind, warning given, main points made, thoughtwaves functional!

Soon, soon, soon.

txxx

Day after tomorrow...

Very pleasant evening had last night. Food and drinkies and suburbia replete with birds, bats and toads: singing, swooping, leaping. Evening smell of 'countryside'. Put me in mind of some other place.

Re. 'another h2g2 romance': oh blimey. I suppose that is an accurate description but it's not one I much care for and your slightly tart reply amused me greatly. If we haven't yet met 'IRL' then who the dickens have I been talking to all this time? Have I been imagining it all?

xx

*joins in somewhat superior sniggering*

Quite!

Ho hum; this idiotic "Are they really REAL?" bit becomes more ridiculous/tedious by the moment doesn't it?

Never mind, my dear, we will be hootoo history pretty soon as far as scandal is concerned; meanwhile I've used the thing for free publicity!

Got to rush off into town, guess what, a certain "Real Person" is squeaking!, but won't be long, would much rather be back in the "Real" world of squeaky aisles in lieu of your RL presence here.

Not long now, somehow the 9th sounds so much nearer than the 8th; probably something to do with being odd numbers, which we are rather too; but who gives a damn!!

Nice longemail waiting for you back at Swankville Mansions. Squeak when I get back via this? I assume mobile is still uncharged?

txxx

Mobile remains limp, poor thing.

Surely when it transpires that we're both fat Texan businessmen and one of us is an axe murderer, the scandal will be greater. But until then we can snigger rudely in the corner.

The 9th does seem nearer but the 10th seems like it's ages away.

I shall nip down the aisles while you're gone and check back in here every now and then: we're minus our glorious leader once more.

xxx

I'm back! Distinctly hot & really somewhat bothered; but it's bloody marvellous to be back in THIS REAL WORLD.

Damned shame about the mobile, but I would probably be tempted to over-use it, maybe this way is better.

Best of all, of course is going to be any time from 4.16 onwards on Friday.

txxx

Oh dear. Still, safely home now and you can tell me about it later. Meanwhile, the ecstacy and the agony which is filing continues. Opening the window earlier I had to climb upon the ledge but don't worry, I didn't open it far enough to fall out (might lose the odd file that way, though). Do you know the old song 'Button Up Your Overcoat'?

xx

*EEEEK*!!!!!*

Visions of you plummeting to your doom are not what's required right now!

I think I shall have to insist upon a tiny, soft nest of cotton-wool to line that overcoat please, at least until Friday, when a certain amount of leash-straining will be allowed.

My physical damage from this little expedition is luckily limited to a blister on my foot (she must be mad, revealing this to the man whose page is titled "foot fetish"), plus an itchy back from heat rash.

Rashly rushing is probably the cause of both these, but the alternative seemed likely to result in the possibility of worse damage being caused, by me, not to me.

As you say, we shall squeak later, can't be soon enough for me!

What time do they undo your shackles today?

Have the alternative filers gone yet? Is it now a safe environment for your great & glorious leader to return to? If so, don't bother telling him is my advice.

Beryl would no doubt be shocked to learn that she is featured in this weeks H.O.T.

txxx

Ah, but that was a vision of me not plummeting to my doom. The worst injury I have sustained in recent times was a (ho hum) paper cut inflicted whilst trying to save a file from plummeting to *its* doom. Or, at least, the floor. Why do I never learn? When inanimate objects throw themselves wilfully off the edge of surfaces on which they've been placed let them, I say, and serve them right.

You do sound a little hot and bothered. Best to think of that other place which, in your case, is the same place but with a judicious addition.

Shackles off at five today but I shall be going to Sainsbury's after work to pick up a few items, two of them identical and small...

xx

*musing thoughtfully, hand cupped around chin*

Hmm, two small, identical things; I can think of such items, but they are generally not on sale at Sainsbury's......

I'm actually at the stage of thinking about feeding bodies, not just souls; which definitely injects an air of imminent reality into the proceedings.

Do you like potato salad? (home-made, of course, genuine froggie pommes de terre & all that.)

The market was a delight today, much more satisfying than the supermarket; they were packing away the outside stalls when I arrived & I was able to grab some plants for a knock-down price, so another diversion will be planting these outside my window!

OK, roll on 5pm, which is 6pm here, I shall think of you trudging down the aisles again, but in a different venue. Aisles seem to be rather a feature of your life don't they? Anybody would think you were a vicar, not an axe-murderer! (yes, probably about time you checked that blade is nice & sharp.)

Time for a spot of feeding at this end; after which I shall probably sift gently through the Sunday Times & drift off for my statutory 2hours, which will take me nicely up to around 5pm here, I'm sure I can think of things to occupy me which don't require the Beast to be on until you have returned poorer but laden from your encounter with the aisles!

(will check after posting this though to see if you still have eyes)

txxx

A spot of feeding at which end? I can't see where you're pointing.

It is feeding time in the coot pen too: I'm on my first finger of twix which, like all the best things, come in doubles, and is more appropriate to consume in polite society than certain other confectionary fingers we might mention. Do I like potato salad? Yes, but only the kind with potatoes in it.

The morning has been whittled away quite nicely. Just the dreaded afternoon to do now. Bleh. I have lots to put away: it passes the time quite well, but not as well as snoozing under the Sunday Times.

Until not soon enough,
s xxx

OK, consider yourself temorarily disconnected from technology, but most definitely not from me.

Squeak in a little while. Enjoy your twix etc!

lo
*remembers where she is*

txxx