h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Hi fellow Masqueraders, all 42 of you. Wingnut and I must have similar ideas about the Golden Hare, because during the early 1980’s I remember that my own particular method of unravelling the puzzle was totally different to that which supposedly led to Ampthill,and it took me to a totally different part of the country. Although I didn’t find the Hare, time and again I discovered a “new” clue, both in the book and in reality in the area to which I travelled. Confirmation after confirmation of clues given in the pictures led me closer and closer to a pin-point spot. But time and again, failure to finish the puzzle resulted. The exact spot was elusive. Was I imagining all this? My family and friends certainly thought so, in no uncertain terms, especially after it was found at Ampthill, a stone’s throw from where I live, “CLOSE BY AMPTHILL.”

But I persisted in my delusional state in true British style, never giving up, insisting to all and sundry that a giant hoax was being perpetrated on the whole world, or at least on the British nation. I predicted that the Hare would never be seen, and that it was really still buried at (or near) a place in Cornwall. The West Country is indicated in the last page of text, and the Hare in the second pic. is facing west south west (approx.). Alas, failed sorties into the countryside began to take a strain on family life, and I promised that I would give up my expensive excursions to Cornwall, and put all thoughts of Masquerade out of my mind. Normal family life then resumed, and the book and maps were put away. It was not as easy as it sounds, and then suddenly Kit’s other book, “The Bee On The Comb”, came out.

Having tolerated Masquerade fever for years, my family now had to tolerate a new claim, an outrageous and crazy claim. This was that the new K.W. book was about me! “I” was the Bee On The Comb! MADNESS!!! The book was about myself to some extent, I think, and contained new clues as to the whereabouts of the Hare. Another crisis in the family. Again I had to desist. I had made a promise! Then “Conundrum” came out, a new puzzle to occupy my time that was NOT linked to “Masquerade” and it was NOT to K.W. Naturally, very little time elapsed before I had decided that in fact, “Conundrum” actually WAS by K.W., under an assumed name, of course. Moreover, in the first story of the puzzle (out of 12 in all), the main character in it’s story takes a rest in Ampthill park, the very place where the Golden Hare was purported to have been found. OH NO! NOT AGAIN!

Anyway, to cut a long story short, I believed at the time that I had solved almost three or four of the two-page story puzzles, one of them at a local site, and YES, one of them was in Cornwall at the very site of Masquerade’s “first known point”, a location on top of cliffs near St. Agnes, which I had visited some years earlier, a precise spot! This was too much of a coincidence. Off we go again. K.W.! It must be! That’s what I thought at the time and the passing years have not changed my opinion, BUT, I could be wrong, I know that. However, coincidence seems to be a very common occurrence in my Universe, which I now prefer to call Holodeck 5, (from Star Trek). After all, there is no evidence to suggest that this place within which we all exist is anything more that a computer simulation. So...if you care to indulge me, Holodeck 5 it is for now, an idea which, as I get older, appeals to me more and more than just plain old “universe” or “reality”.

Once again, I failed to find an actual Cadburys Golden Egg, even though I felt sure I had been on the right track. Interestingly enough, each time I wrote to Cadburys to state map grid reference numbers as to the location of a particular Golden Egg, the newspapers revealed a couple of days later that the referred-to Egg had been found. Coincidence? I don’t know, but I suspect not.

By that time, I think I had had enough of getting involved in unsolved mysteries of such character, and certainly my family had, in SPADES! But, what WAS the truth about the Golden Hare? That question still surfaced in my mind from time to time, but I repressed it and eventually forgot all those things. Life went on, and meanwhile the kids grew up (now 19 and 23). Home computers became common household gadgets, and eventually the Internet arrived.

Although I played games on the computers I was never interested in the Web, and was never enticed into that particular world UNTIL...my Son tried to coerce me to go onto the Net, in order to show me how easy it was; and how interesting it was, too.

Well, after much persuasion by my son, and much resistance by myself, I finally agreed to have a look, and to type something into a Search Engine, and then I could go back to playing flight sims, etc. What to search for though? OF COURSE, let’s type in “Kit Williams” and “Masquerade”, and see what happens. I really expected nothing at all, knowing damn all about the nature of the net and, as everyone already knew (except me), Masquerade had already been forgotten about years ago. Nobody would be interested now. How wrong I was! That was just over a year ago, the beginning of a strange and new chapter in Masquerade............I had discovered H2G2.

It wasn’t long before a posting by somebody calling themselves “Wingnut” appeared. Someone who felt just like me. A “Twin” you might say. GREAT!

From time to time, I would check the H2G2 site to see if anyone had responded to Wingnut’s article, but no, nothing. Then one day several weeks ago, Logicus Tracticus Philosiphicus (codename), left a seemingly strange reply, so strange that I recognised the “lion by his claw”. K.W.....It had to be! I just knew it. It was ABSLURD, or maybe, upon reflection, it was only absurd. Thirty words plus three icons, thirty three in all. VERRY MEANINGFUL, (to me at any rate).

From that day onwards, until now, I’ve been chasing threads to other clues, (on H2G2), far too many to enumerate here, but suffice to say, someone calling themselves Ezam Hoo responded to Logicus Tracticis Philosophicus, referring to them as Kit. Why? What’s it all about? And now this Ezam Hoo is also trying to find the Hare. HMMM! I feel I must act quickly and go A hunting once again. So...Ezam, the race is on. The Golden Hare, if it exists, is the prize. I MUST finish the game. Hang it all, Holodeck 5 wouldn’t be Holodeck 5 without a good old fashioned chase and search for gold at the end of the story. And what about the truth? Why all the deception? Whatever the outcome, whoever claims the prize (if any), Masquerade by Kit Williams, has in my opinion to be the cleverest and most beautiful puzzle ever. Incredibly complicated, wonderfully illustrated, and beautifully written. So much detail, too. I take my hat off to U, Kit.

As for my family, what of their opinion? They are so sick of my delusions that they will be only too happy for me to join the race, so that I will have to face reality and apologise to them when I fail to find the Hare. Then, my promise to destroy all evidence of this obsession when I return will end a 25 year hangover from the good old days, OAKAY? But don’t forget dear readers that Masquerade means “FALSE FACE”, also, that the Hare, in the last picture, is a cloud pointing to the South, under the SKYE. (Isle OF Skye?). Only the tip of Cornwall is vertically under Skye on the map, and don’t forget that in the first picture “inside” Masquerade, the Hare is a Hill, possibly 628 feet high in old money. I might suggest St. Agnes Beacon!

In St. Anges, there is, or was in those days, a PUPPET theatre. Coincidence? Again, I think not. So..........It’s all or nothing, everything hangs on this. What surprise will Holodeck 5 hold for me two weeks from now? I wonder? Watch this space!

How then to travel, and when? Alone, or with a friend? Should I let all of you know exactly when I leave, or keep quiet? Ezam Hoo says he leaves in mid-January. HO-HUM! Perhaps we’ll all meet up at the same point at the same time. Or is it simply a case of spilt personality? Perhaps, as has happened to me every time before, failure is going to be my constant companion all the way home? That`s a not-too-pleasant experience, I can tell you. I KNOW! So, we shall see what we shall see. Again, watch this space for more info.
17/01/04

watch this space for more info. keep watching, if you listen as well you will deafened, in the silence