h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*stumbles into Little B's space and looks up*

*looks at the ground, shuffles his feet and starts crying again*

And to fink I used to be respec'ed and reverered froughout all of h2g2 with my powerfol articles and forum shattering personal'ty.

Well, someone once noticed me once if vat counts. Do'you mind if I spend a little time here until I get my old self back?

*starts to cry 'cos he can't find his friends*

*pats Sklap reassuringly*

There there.. Take a deep breath and calm down...

*Puts the kettle on and makes everyone a big cup of tea*

Universal cure-all. Drink that, put your feet up and listen to my somewhat eclectic music collection and while you're doing that I'll make you a pretty Easter bonnet... That'll get you noticed again eh?

*pulls out a heap of cardboard, glitter and eggshells and smiles happily*

We'll have you back to normal in two shakes of a quite unspritely lamb's tail...

Fank you, have you got any biccies to go with that nice cup of tea? I really, really like ones with chocolate on.

*looks hopeful but wonders if he's sure about the eclectic music collection, or even what it is and if it'd taste good dipped in tea or with chocolate on*

I think making a hat would be good. Can it have stars on it?

*almost forgets he was crying*

Have you folks also lost your homes and your friends? What shall we do???

*plonks a plate of chocolate hobnobs and jammy dodgers on the table*

Uh.. first thing I would suggest is that we all remain calm. This move was a traumatic time for all of us... *smiles reassuringly at all bewildered refugees* Then I think I will probably look into researching a series of articles that can justify the use of obscenity, thereby cunningly avoiding the new regime of 'pro-active' censorship.. *coughs* Sorry.. I mean moderation...