h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I just got back, after I knew that h2g2 has been up for about 2 weeks but I have to study for finals. Yuck. Anyway I found this email I wrote a long time ago that belongs in a journal, and I thought it would be interesting to point out what it's like for a student my age in Texas schooling. No one ever looks at what I say but I can link it and/or make people go there.

Anywho, here's the entry:

Oooooorrrgh. I feel icky. Need more water. The clothes are drying... lala.... bored now... but I want to talk to you... *pout*. My mom just went to bed. OOOH! Breaking news! Isabelle is in love with Danny (so she says excitedly over AIM), Lauren is worried about her "boy" (Maurice) cause according to him he has a fever of 101.6, Zach wants to name his kid Sylvia, Rachael, or something I don't remember... uhm...... I've got "Sheep Go To Heaven" stuck in my head (the end to-- "go to hell, go to hell, go to hell..."), ermm... clothes done! yay! OH! I'm having fun in Shakespeare, oh yeah... yesterday, twice in a row, I got dumped on the phone for television. First twas Andy ("Simpsons are on! Simpsons are on! Pleeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaassssssssssse can I go watch?") and then Christie and Ani ("ooh, X-Files are on." Next thing I know it's silence and the occasional "oh! dead body!"). When I heard the X-Files theme I realized it was all HOPELESS and went to bed, to wake up at 6:45 (that's an hour late).

OKAY! Run like HELL out the door, wham, into Sci-fi only 15 minutes late... in the middle of a movie. So I sit and automatically get poked by Arend (this is not unusual) who says "Hi, Baka Prefect." I snarl and continue watching the movie. I don't notice Mr. Tyson is in a P***Y mood (this comes into play later).

You don't mind me telling you all this, do you? oh well, Too bad, I think it's interesting anyway....

So... where was I? oh yes. The usual as I leave sci fi (Sean yelling
something about how I'm a baka, screaming "gong!", laughing, and running like hell to Japanese, followed quickly by Arend and occasionally Shea). I run into Isabelle, Lauren, and Maurice, who say the usual:

Isabelle: "DIDJA TALK TO ANDY? ANYTHING NEW???"
Me: "Zark off. Hi Lauren!"
Lauren: "Hey, Maurice read my fanfic."
Me: "I heard. I heard you liked the Max "false alarm" part, Maurice..."
(Maurice laughs shyly and hides behind Lauren's backpack)
(Isabelle says "bai" and quickly exits)
(Lauren, Maurice and I sing Beatles for the duration of passing period and bolt to class in 30 seconds, which is harder for me then them).

I run down the opposite upstairs hall to Spanish, when who should I run into around the corner but Ian? He squeaks.
Ian: "You need to email me, Michiru-san."
Me: "Ian! I have to go! (points desperately) Spanish! Senora Goldberg!Gonna! Kill! Me!"
Ian: (makes a wierd chibi noise) See you at lunch then! (runs)

I run to class and, as usual, sing the whole way there.

"On the phone, long long distance, always through such strong resistance, first you say you're too busy, I wonder if you even miss me," I skid into class barely making it: however, there is a twist this time. Andy Pearson is talking to Sra Goldberg at the door! I literally run into him, and scream.

"You're back! YES! OUR CLAUDIO IS BACK!" (I do a dance). "Now we can actually PRACTICE our scenes! We've been having to talk to the floor lately!"

Andy laughs and says, "Hi Sylvia. I see you missed me!"

I run, slide, and make a home run into my chair, barely (unfortunately) missing Chris Springs, whom I hate with the fire of a thousand suns (as Alex would have it). Spanish is boring, boring, boring, and Mondays are WORSE. All we do is take meaningless notes... so I tend to space out. The rest of the period who knew what happened, all I know is the Sra asked me a question and I answered correctly, so she was happy.

Next, what? Ah, tis an "A" Day. Orrrghhh... Math... someone shoot me... (I look around for potential suspects. Unfortuanately, Duncan is nowhere in sight. Damn). Isabelle comes running up to me, looking excited. I skip up to her.

"Hey! What class to you have next?"
"Science. You? Oh...." (she sees me grimace) "Math... Hey! I have an idea. Skip and come to Ms. Miralle's with me! She won't mind, I'm sure." (we start to walk down the stairs)
"Are you serious? No way..."
"yeah, sure. she's cool enough."
"errr.... all right!" (I know this won't happen, I'm not completely
senile). we walk to her class, which is downstairs caddy corner to mine- except all my classes are upstairs. Fun. Ms. Miralle isn't there, and as Isabelle breaks this to me I notice Max walk in the door.

"OY! MAX!" I yell as I run up to him. He's gargantuan, I dunno, seven feet maybe. "What is this I hear about you telling Maurice that I use Andy as an excuse to not go out with you???"

"It's true," he says calmly, and starts to walk inside. But oh no, I'm not letting him get away THAT easily.

"Just because you're trying to find a way so that I don't puncture your over-inflated EGO!" I scream at the top of my lungs after him. Satisfied, I run to Math upstairs, and notice two girls laughing at me. Screw them, I think as I run up the steps two at a time. Skid skid skid to class, slip in, under the desks, slip over Alex's huge backback and into my desk as the teacher closes the door. (We don't have bells at Kealing.)

Nothing really happened in Math. Alex and I sang They Might Be Giants as usual, and we had candy after our assignment, no surprise, feeding the zoo experiments treats after the cruelty... oh... as you can tell I HATE Math with a passion... I got a 60 on the report card...

Next class: fifth period, Magnet shakespeare. this I don't have to run to after chatting; for some reason I don't know where anyone is at this time of day. I think they all disappear. Hm.

Shakespeare we did in the choir room, and the rest I'll tell you tomorrow after school. I'm sleepy. Isabelle's coming over, and I may call, in the meantime,

Thanks for reading!

-Sleepy Sylvia

"What the hell, he thought, you're only young once, and threw himself out of the window. That would at least keep the element of surprise on his side."

-Mostly Harmless

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And that ends my email. OH and I have a theory!! *cough* I have a theory!! *cough* (sorry, Monty Python damage). My theory IS, that these school shootings are NOT caused by television by itself. I mean, think about it. The media would not be evil on purpose, there's no good in that for them. However, the media does whatever sells, and what sells is the culture. Feed the culture into the mouths of the children, and it becomes the culture again-- HOWEVER, that culture is EVERYWHERE. So what is the blame? Well. All the kids who have shot or threatened to at a school have been depressed. "Oh," the general population (culture) thinks, "oh, my kid isn't like that, that's a rare thing," and what they don't realize is that THAT attitude is the whole problem! Almost all teenagers are depressed. It's hard not to be- we feel like we have no power, no reason for life, no enlightenment- it all seems horrible. So the kids who don't have an outlet, who are shunned by society, who feel inadequate.. they are the ones who take it out on the world through violence. It's only one way. Others rape, or are just generally violent, or take it out on their kids, or at work... the list goes on and on. The ones who are smart find an outlet-- for me it is writing. But some can't do that. Some don't have the empowerment to. So, why are kids shooting their classmates at an alarming rate? Their parents don't realize that depression takes almost all of us. Society holds them back from being who they are (sound familiar in your junior high? "you fag!" think about it, it's a brainwashing squashing process). The media tells them how to let it out, not to mention America going to war every five bloody seconds. Transferrence of agression sounding a bit familiar?
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How did I get on this topic? Oh well.

What an interesting life you lead. I got lost half way through, though. sorry. did that take you a long time to write?

actually, I type quickly when I'm ranting. there was a lot of grammatical mistakes but I went over it. it's really quite old... thanks! my life may be interesting to everyone else, but it just tends to make me think. I like it.

it sounds impossibly complicated, and try as i might, i just cannot finish it...

and what an odd bunch of friends you have. no offence...

none taken. I wish the lot of them would go soak their heads. and don't worry about reading it, I REALLY need to delete it or something because it makes my page look like a cat symmetrically barfed on it or something... is that the right spelling for "symetrically"? nah.

a cat with a very specialised, legible vomit. what sort of cat would that be