h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

There are two ways to explain why I feel the way I am feeling. The short version and the long version, and there's a big problem with each of them.

The short version is simply one sentence. It has a verb and a subject and it makes perfect gramatical sense, except for the fact that it doesn't explain the reason I feel the way I do about it. It simply gives the cause. So here is is:

My aunt is getting married.

See? It makes perfect sense, and yet, it doesn't. A paradox, if you like.

The longer version is much longer, hence the name. And in a way it explains the short version. I suppose the short version doesn't make sense without the long version. So here it is:

My Aunt Sarah is my Dad's younger sister, and two years ago, her husband, my Uncle Graham, died. He had a heart attack due to a hereditary heart condition. He died on Easter Sunday 2005; only in his 40's. It was one of the worst times of my life.
What made it worse (although it couldnt be much worse) was that you couldn't imagine a more alive man. He was generous, wise, funny, loving; the best person I've ever known and loved. And I barely knew him - not in an adult way, not as a real person.

Sarah was devastated, as we all were. They'd been going out since she was 15, engaged when she was 16 and married at 20. He was her best friend's older brother and they were close like you wouldn't believe. She told me a while after his death that they refrained from having children, as they felt that any child could never be loved as much as they loved each other. They were absolute soul mates.
In a way, my cousin (his sister's daughter) and I were like their children.

Eventually, the pain lessened. We began to get used to the big, empty house, so quiet without his roaring laughter or avid story telling.

And then she met Martin. New Year's Eve 2006. You couldn't think of anyone more different to Graham. Vulgar, juvenile, immature, racist, sexist. He acted most of the time like the boys in my year at school. I'll try to avoid using any expletives at this point, as they are the words I most associate with him.

Of course, he's a perfectly nice bloke and fine to talk to, but when you step back, all these bad qualities leap out at you. My parents and Graham's sister and brother in law, and my cousin don't like him much either. But of course, anyone compared to Graham is going to look bad in our eyes, especially when it comes to Sarah. But we thought, "at least she's happy".
About six weeks after they got together, he moved into her house. I suppose it made sense; the house was huge and empty and he'd recently been made redundant and was living with his mother. Yes, his mother.

Oh, I didn't mention, Sarah is a senior social worker, often dealing with disrupted families and children. Guess how she met Martin. Yep, you've guessed it. He was going through a messy divorce, and she was his social worker- sorting out custody of the children. It digusts me.

We all knew she could do SO much better. I suppose we hoped that eventually she'd realise and they'd break up. I mean, for God's sake, this man barely has a personality.

But then, the day before yesterday, she called us up, sounding happy and excited, like a teenager again. They'd been planning to get engaged nearer her birthday in April, but they were on holiday, and saw a ring.... Mais, bien sûr (!)... (I tend to talk in French when I'm annoyed.)

And now he's going to be a permenant fixture. He'll never go away. She'll never be the person she was, or is, when she's not with him. She always acts about 17 when they're together. She'll be that way ALL the time. He'll always be in the house. He'll sleep in Graham's bed, sit in Graham's chair, lay Graham's fires, walk Graham's dog.

Words truly cannot express the anger, the grief, the pain this makes me feel. But at least I've managed to explain why...

No replies. I must be really unloved...



*guilt trip, guilt trip, guilt trip!*
Ahem.

I can't reply to to that without using many rude words.

I hope she snaps out of it, loneliness can make you do very strange things. *sigh*

Yes indeed. (Silent Yay for love!)
I don't think she will though. And I have been sort of asked to be bridesmaid; or even a matron of zarqing honour.
Ah well, I'm slowly getting used to it.