h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

The English were recruiting men to fight in the Battle of Hastings (1066). News of the Archers of Llantrisant had reached one of his scouts, and the scout came to Llantrisant to view the archers skill.

The scout assembles the Archers and asks the first to demonstrate his skill. "See that tree over there?" the first archers says, "well, see the branch with the robin sittin on ... I'll shoot the leaf off the end of that branch". He pulls back his bow and fires true, straght through the leaf. The scout is suitably impressed. He turns to the second Archer and asks him to demonstrate his skill.

"See that door over there, the one on the house at the end?" the second Archer says, "Well, there is a knot in that door, and I am going to hit it from 100 yards!" He takes his aim, and again, as the first did, fires true, hitting the knot in the door. The scout begins beaming at the reward he will get for finding such excellent Archers. Smiling he turns to the third and asks him to demonstrate his skill.

"See that cow over there ... the brown one." The third Archer says, "I shall hit the bell around her neck from here." He takes his aim and fires, but not only misses the cow bell, but impales a cow 12 yards to the left of his target. The scout looks on in amazement.

"I'll take you two" .. he says "but you," he says pointing at the third Archer, "you are a liability!"

The first Archer protests "You either take us all or none of us!" The scout, seeing his bonus diminishing by the second replies "Ok Ok .. but he could have someones eye out."


If you don't get that .. research the Battle of Hastings.