h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I can't imagine life in England without rain, but it seems to be going so totally over the top at the moment, it's just insane.

50 flood warnings, 30 rivers flooding, and so many people who's high street now resembles a torrid and filthy Venice. Although, you wouldn't catch me swimming in the water in Venice.

My roof is leaking, which would not be half as irritating if it was silent... and if i hadn't tripped over the bucket on the stairs, spilt the water everywhere, and prompty put the bucket back on the WRONG step. So now we have a dry bucket and a wet step.

The trains have stopped, the buses need water wings, and unless you have an army landing craft, you can't just pop up to homebase and buy more buckets.

My mode of transport is not affected, well mostly not affected. I ride a motorbike. So although my roads are not flooded, my ass usually is. There are not many things more miserable than zipping along, wearing full wet weather gear, and yet feeling a cold, wet sensation where you are sitting. Then you realise that your pants are leaking. Not to mention the fact that I steam up my visor, so I need to ride with it open. And that means a face full of stinging rain.

All of this would come as no surprise if I was English I guess. But I'm not - I'm Australian. So all I can say is... WHAT THE HELL AM I DOING HERE??