h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Not a good day. The ex-wife has decided to start using me as a puppet again, which means I'm in for a few weeks of Hell. And I am completely powwerless to do anything about it.

I'm sure this is not news to anybody but when there is a child involved, ex-partners can often end up playing a game of manipulation. Usually one way. There is something fundamentally wrong with our social structure when someone can abuse and frstrate someone else, knowing that there is no possible come back, because there is a child involved.

The problem is that I have worked hard at maintaining a workable, friendly relationship with the mother. We caan get along so well, and I think it is important for a child to see this. It produces a mch more conducive environment for my daughter. The problem is that my wife has custody, and she knows how to use it to get what she wants. If I agree with everything, we are the best of friends. If I disagree with something, or make a request that somehow impinges on her, I'm threatened with court and how I'm a bad father. (The fact that she spends every other day of the week telling me and everyone else how wonderful a father I am doesn't seem to figure...)

It got to the point recently where she physically assaulted me in front of my daughter because she was upset with someone else. And so I have to live the next ten years swallowing my pride and forcing smiles because she still wants me to behave as a friend. I'm not. Not any more. But if I don't, she's already made it clear that she'll make my life hell.

Is that fair?

it sounds like you are having a bad time of it.
i,m sorry to hear that things are that bad between you
unfortunately i,m not an expert in these things and am not really sure what advice i can give you about how to improve things.
best wishes the traveller