h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Following from the bit about hypnotising lobsters, similar feats can be achieved using (live, uncooked) chickens. The advantage is that the raw materials are easier and cheaper to obtain than lobsters.

Using one hand, grasp your live chook securely, so that it cannot escape or injure you. Hold it down to the ground, with its beak touching the ground. With one finger of the other hand (if the ground is soft enough - otherwise use use a highly visible marker pen), start in contact with the chicken's beak, and draw a straight line heading away from the chicken for as far as you can reach. The chicken will focus on the line, and will enter the hypnotic state. You can now let go of the chicken. It will stay where it is until some significant external event (prod, loud noise, etc.) distracts it from its study of the line.

The challenges are:

1) To find a useful application for this.

2) To get the chicken to tell you what's so fascinating about the line.

A useful application for hypnotising chickens could be to stop them from running off in busy markets. Birds generally work on a pretty simple level in some respects, like I'm told, switching off when it gets dark.

An army officer friend of mine who was sent out for training in Namibia bought a chicken from a market to feed his men. The guy gave him the chicken with his head tucked under its wing and the bird, thinking it was night, just shut down and could be kept without being trussed or a cage.

Another intersting thing to find a use for
Hypnotising crocodiles and alligators.

Grab the unsuspecting croc by the snout - Hold firmly with one hand (for obvious reasons, hold tight) whilst with the other stroke the croc between the eyes following a path to the end of it snout - repeat several times untill it stops trying to beat you to death with its tail - slowly remove your grip (be ready to move fast if it didnt work) and it will stay there motionless until disturbed.
hypno

That's great I plan a trip to regents park zoo so I'll give it a try in the croc dept. How about hypnotising boisterous five year old twin boys at bed time. It's easy really. Simply suggest they play the who sleeps first game so there is some competition. Give one of them some special sleep medicine. Let them both see you pour the tap water onto a spoon from a medicine type bottle and into their favourite drink suggesting that it will make it taste nice. If the other one complains suggest to him that he doesn't need it because he's really so much better at sleeping. Many of you? may have read something similar in the waking hypnosis section of Dave Elmans Hypnotherapy. Both children are now 15 and they inform me that they never have any trouble getting to sleep ever since they first met me. Ok I confess their mother was an ex of mine but the kids unfortunately were'nt mine. The interesting thing here is that even although she new it was water their mother would sometimes ask for sleep medicine if she was having a disturbed night and it worked a treat. I'm sure that a better hypnotist than me could explain it better but the simple reason this worked is that she consiously bypassed her critical faculty and replaced the restless can't sleep idea with the go to sleep idea by asking me to fetch the pretend sleep medicine. The first time we did this she asked me as a joke but sharp as a button (button?) I said yup that'll do it I'll go and get some.

The sleep potion sounds like a good idea i shall try it at the first opertunity. There is nothing to put me to sleep better than a placebo. Great idea! Any way i'll try it now..............................zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

A reply; well this is a nice surprise.

I hope it works for you if not let me know and I'll give you a refund.


keithhony