h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

So Graduation was yesterday. Huzzah. Now l have a useless slip of paper tucked in a faux-leather, embossed binder to complement my useless four years' High School education. l think l've already started blocking out the bulk of the experience, but l do remember that quite a few of the graduates' parents came bearing airhorns, which they tooted constantly and, not handling loud noises well, my exaggerated-startle-response got quite a workout. Oh, and there were beach balls being tossed about, a lot. The Assistant Principal got bopped in the nose with one, as she tried to confiscate it.
Then what? Oh, they wouldn't let us throw our caps in the air. We all participated in the "Changing of The Tassel" ceremony, though. Thus l enter adulthood.
Couldn't we just be like native tribesmen of yore, and have ourselves tied to anthills until we kill a Greater Tusked Seaotter, or something? lt'd be a whole lot less painful than enduring that many Motivational Keynote Speakers. l tried to understand them, and take in their probably-very-self-esteem-boosting words of wisdom, but after puzzling over the meaning of the phrase "competing for happiness", my brain hurt too much.
Anyway. l guess this means my life has to, like, have a purpose now, or something.
But will l get out of this chair in which l am currently sprawled, and do something about that fact, becoming Empowered and Motivated?
Eh.
Not as long as l've the alternative of playing with The Random Bar Joke Generator (http://www.brunching.com/toys/toy-barjoke.html), l won't....
l don't care if they say it's random. l know it has a pattern. l know it. And that pattern must be found.
Heh. lsn't this how that mathemetician in "Pi" started out?
Schitzophrenia ahoy...
Oh, wait.
Well. More florid manifestations of schitzophrenia, ahoy!

Ahhh, I remember when I killed my first Greater Tusked Seaotter while tied to an anthill. It was a late September afternoon and the sun was a deep orange... the ants had just finished feasting on the epidermis of my back and were beginning on the dermis... and I had just about given up hope of ever finding a Greater Tusked Seaotter willing to cross the inhospitable land to reach my anthill, when suddenly, a teasing breeze brought the faint whiff of ...

But enough about that.

Condolences on the hollow echo of the slip of graduation paper. In spite of what you may have heard, don't look for this magic 'purpose' thing that they say you must have. The journey is all. Find an interesting path and see where it takes you.

Redbeard

Okay, so Redbeard? lf l got yet another rejection letter from yet another (my final selection) college yesterday, and l've, like, completely run out of educational options, 'cept l guess the local community college, would that count as an interesting path? (Hey, you're in the academic racket, right? Any ideas?)
Hmm. l guess l could become an entrepreneur. Start my own Greater Tusked Seaotter extermination service. l could have some business cards printed up...

I think the business cards are a great idea! I've known of dot.coms that have started with less of an idea than Greater Tusked Seaotter Extermination Service

Yes, I would say that running out of good education options is an interesting path...

I am in the education racket, as you say, and think that college is a GOOD IDEA, but I also know that many people choose interesting paths that don't involve going directly to college after High School.

I don't know you well enough to give advice in your situation, but I can give some general observations:

There is a tendency for people to assume that you just go ahead to college after high school. For many of them, college becomes just another thing to do, like high school, and they don't enjoy it or get anything out of it. I found college the most exhilarating experience in the world because I really wanted to go, and I enjoyed being a college student so much that now, years later, I've returned and I get paid for it! I'm very fortunate.

If you go to college only because you're told to, or your parents are making you go and paying for it, you'll get very little out of it.

If you want college bad enough, you'll go. You'll find a way and it'll be great. Even if it doesn't happen right now. Sometimes it means more to people when they take a year or two away from what's been so far a lifetime of going to school. Maybe you work, maybe take a few local classes, before going to college. It can also give you an advantage over your college classmates who won't have the life experience or maturity that you have. This is a very interesting path, particularly for those who may be temporarily lacking in one of the following areas for going to college: grades, money, ambition, emotional maturity. I'm guessing the issue for you is the first one.

If you end up not going to college, you'll probably be joining the work force in some way (unless you're independently wealthy). I have two pieces of advice in that case: don't settle and don't quit

1. Don't settle. Let's say you work your way up to Assistant Manager of the department store Now you've got a regular income, an apartment, credit card bills. You might be tempted to say 'Well, I don't really like this job, but I can't just chuck it all to go off and pursue a whim, so I'll continue here' Don't settle. If you're not fulfilled and stop seeking, all the interesting paths will go on without you.

2. Don't quit. So the only job you could get is cleaning out Seaotter carcasses and it really stinks. Don't quit. Be the best carcass cleaner there is! (Of course, if another opportunity comes along, jump ship as fast as you can... that's not quitting, it's moving along the interesting path) As long as you don't settle (see #1), you can do anything if you remind yourself it's temporary. Keep alert to new opportunities and they'll come.

Enough prattling. There are interesting paths there. Just make sure you see them.

Let me know if any of this was helpful, if it even related to your situation at all, or...

Redbeard

schitzophrenia ha, i have but one thing to say about that. In the immortalized words o the ever silent and spooky Murry "beats being alone."

l remember a song from several years ago that had a chorus that went "...but l'm glad that l live in a split level head..."
Heh. Who sang that? lt was on Dr. Demento (ah, classic geeked-out radio..)

And l -am- glad that l live in a split level head. Except when we go out for dinner...or try ordering in pizza...yeesh.