h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

So, yesterday was the big day for Gruesome #2: she started school in the first grade.

It's quite nice here, how they make a big thing out of it. At our school, the protestant primary school in the next village (very cute, it only has 4 classes, so about 120 kids) they start the day at 9am with a little church service attended by all the new kids and as many of their parents, grandparents, aunties, uncles and so on as can fit in the church. All the other kids from the school attend too.

The new ones sat in the choir stalls, with their big shiny new school bags (more of those in a bit) and shiny excited faces. There was a bit of singing, accompanied by the 4th graders on their recorders and one of the mums on her guitar, some talking and a quick bit of Our Father (which I can't remember - and since I'm not a Christian and never knew it in German anyway, I didn't join in. I got some Disapproving Looks for that).

While I'm on the subject: I was surprised this year (as I was last year at #1s First day at school) that they sing and pray sitting down. Is that peculiar to this church, or do they do that in all German churches?

After the service the kids walked over to the school with their teachers (one teacher, who is also the headmistress, and one teacher's assistant) and the parents (and others) milled around a bit before going to the school to stand around in the playground drinking coffee. -hubs missed that part, unfortunately, because he had to work, but my mum came with me.

After about an hour, the lessons for that day (for the 1st graders) were finished, and they all came running out - with their shiny new school bags - and were given their Schultüte (it means School Bag - but it's not a satchel) and we all took photos. In our case, we hung around for half an hour so that we could get #1 Gruesome and all go into town for lunch.

So, first the school bags (satchel type thing).All primary school kids carry enormous back packs - which are lighter than they look until the books go in - which are usually spread between two or three well known (in Germany) brand names. These things are expensive: for #1 the bag alone was €94 (it was reduced) that was without the sports bag, the pencil case etc etc. For #2 we got a good one with everything included for €85 from E-bay (a new one).

All the kids have them so there is no chance of not joining in. In fact, I remember a court case a few years ago from a single mum on benefits who claimed for the whole cost of one of these things from the government, because all the kids had one and it's not fair to the kids on welfare if they can't.

She won the case.

But I digress.

There is another custom, which I think is lovely. Each kid gets a giant cone - the Schultüte - (really, ours is about a metre and a half long from tip to tip) which is decorated (usually home made by the mums - especially if you live in a village, competition is fierce, and again, because all the kids are getting one it is impossible to be the one who buys one from a supermarket) and filled with the pens, books and such stuff that the kids need for school. There are usually a few sweeties in there too and a little pressie (both of mine got their very own alarm clocks)

On Friday we have to make sure the Schultüte is OK so that #2 can take it to school for her school photograph. Just about every German you ever meet will have their photo somewhere - I love to look at them.

Anyhoo... since it was a special day we took them to a cafe for lunch, followed by ice cream in the town square (the weather was beautiful). My mum bought each of the Gruesomes a pair of earrings and a little necklace (they've just had their ears pierced, so that's what they'll be getting for birthdays and Christmas from now on) as a starting school pressie.

Then we took them home to do their homework!! Poor little pests!

I'm proud to report that although I came close, I didn't actually in the church - although I did have a very difficult moment when the priest was talking about the joyous new beginning and all, and I was thinking about how the parents in the school in Beslan must have been feeling at that point for them last week.

They grow up so fast...

Good point about Beslan.

At least they'll probably know more about Christianity than my little cherubs. Today I got the first entry for my amusingly whimsical autobiography.

In an RE lesson it turned out that none of the pupils in my C of E school class had heard of Christianity (I swear, not a single one!). So, I briefly tried to explain the C of E and the break with Rome. Lacking in hope I asked if any of the kids knew any of the rules of the Catholic Church.

One hand went up.

Yes, Jane, I asked.

"Don't speak when God's speaking," she replied.

You gotta love 'em, but good grief!

When I was in primary school, we all had to learn the Ten Commandments off by heart, and I can still recite them, complete with thys and thous. We also had to learn the Beattitudes, but I can't remember them.

What is the C of E?

CofE= Church of England, protestant, run by archbishops.

My RE was as minimal as I could make it. From a very young age religion made me nervous.

I can still remember the sons starting at each new school and it seems like five minutes ago. They have grown up into the most amazing young men and all the squabbles over homework, 'Mummy, I've got tummy ache' etc, etc now fade into insignificance.

White Hart, my dear sister, once got an RE report describing her as 'cynical and world weary'. She attributes this to an assignment to write a news report on some of Jesus' doings in which the disciples insisted that 'Zesus is just zis guy, you know'.

Good old WH; a Hitchhiker from the first.

It sounds like a lovely day, Sho!

I've been in a number of German church services (Landeskirche and Methodistische) and they all sat down to sing - but stood up to pray.

Jules

My RE teacher would have spotted the HH reference, but he was a pretty cool guy.

I'm sort of ambivalent about the RE teaching they receive, so as long as they're learning about other religions I'm ok with it. But I do wonder if they will mention Pagans or other such things. Probably not at primary school.

Tonight I have to go to the first parents' evening. Each class has to have a parent to be on the PTA (type thing) and a reserve. I got spammed to be the reserve for #1's class last year, so I'm sitting on my hands this year for both classes.

It will be interesting to meet the other parents again. I know one or two by sight so it's not as bad as last year when I didn't know any of them.

School is still a big hit though, and "homework is fun, mummy"

yah, right.

Hoemwork? Fun? *Punches wall.* Stupid Ireland!

Most Pagan and Neopagan religions would probably not be recognised by the World Council of Chruches (or whatever), which is perhaps not suprising, considering the esistance of Klingon Wicca (!). On the other hand, I heard that at some point in England, when asked their religion for a census, about a third of the population put down 'Jedi.' Hmmm.

ooooo Klingon Wicca???? That's for the teenage boys, isn't it? They're missing out on all the action as the teenage girls discover wicca and black eyeliner.

and don't worry about the homework being fun. It's colouring pictures and writing the letter i at the moment. She's only 6.

True to my form, when #1 had her first homework she pretended she didn't have any and didn't do it at all. She's my daughter, the other one is a changeling. Obviously.

The 'Jedi' thing was the 2001 census - there was a mistaken idea that if more than a certain number of people put something down it would be recognised as a 'proper' religion. 390,000 people (0.7% of the population) actually went through with it. Where I live, in Oxford, 2% of the population declared themselves to be Jedi, the second highest concentration in the country.

I'm glad your daughter's enjoying school, Sho - long may it last!

Sho, enjoy your freedom girl!
Although you're now tied to the clock

I was very proud when my girls started school in their brand spanking new uniforms. I beamed. When my big lad started (he was my baby then) I bawled at the gates. I wasn't ready to let him go.

We have no ceremonies here, they start a week early a "reception class" going just afternoons, [the last week of Spring term] then start proper beginning of Sept (usually just shy of their 5th birthday, Allan was JUST turned 4)

I couldn't compete with the one-upmanship that goes on in your neck of the woods, Sho.
In all my trips to school, I never made one friend at the school gates.
Last year & the year before when I was taking my grandson to (my old) school 2 days a week to help my daughter out, the other Mum's treated me like I was invisible. His teacher appeared nervous of me, dunno why, she only ever spoke to me when I addressed her first.
That was really weird, taking my grandson to my old infant school. Nothing had changed, except of course, it all seemed smaller. Even the rings on the brick walls were still there. And the window winders. I didn't feel nostalic, just worn.

€85 from E-bay

Praying and singing sitting down?? How strange. I was in Church last Saturday for the memorial for the Vicar who killed himself in July. (The one who married me last year). It was packed to the rafters and people stand as soon as the organ starts, then we belted out the hymns, the ministers struggled with their words but they got through it. He's sadly missed. I'm still in shock - he was a fellow Hitchhikers fan.

None of my kids are like me Sho, not one of them has inherited my eye colour (neither has my grandson) none of them like sci-fi, none shares my interest in astronomy. I look at my youngest and he's 100% his father, except for his brown eyes which come from his paternal grandad who passed over before he was born.
Every child is unique but it would be nice to see some of your own mannerisms/looks passed on.

The school in Beslan I watched the home video of the first day at school from 2 years ago, so got an inkling of what it would be like. It's worse than any tragedy I've ever known, because it was man-made. Over one hundred children died in the Aberfan disaster but that was an accident - even though it was the Coal Boards fault, it wasn't a deliberate act.
It's at times like this when I think I've lived too long, the pain is so great, you wonder what further atrosities can be thought up, there's not only the dead and grieving families but all the survivors will be mentally scarred for life.

for Breslan. (I have been working long hours recently and couldn't follow it in detail, but the sheer numbers are breathtaking, shocking)

I have been a regular church goer in Germany for at least 15 years and still don't say the Lord's Prayer in German. Or anything else for that matter.

But our village is not as bad as yours, I don't think, Sho. They have accepted me in the Parish as a non-Catholic and even invited me to serve on the Parish Committee several times.

For example, our Schultüten were very amateur affairs as I am a bit cack-handed. The children actually had a hand in making them. They still have them. At least Dominic does, it's hanging on the ceiling of his room. He's in 10th grade now. (Parents evening on the 23rd). We never felt as though someone was looking down on us, because our Schultüten were so obviously hand made. (You can't trim them with lace and glitter for boys!)

As for sitting to pray, as far as I know, in Protestant churches here you usually stand to pray. As most of the attendees of the service will not have been regular churchgoers, perhaps they just didn't know this. In the Catholic church it is exactly the same as I remember from my childhood and youth days in the Anglican church with regard to sitting and standing, although sometimes people don't stand up to sing a hymn, if, say, it is the one after communion when everyone is returning to their seats at different times.

I don't think knowing about Christianity or the history of the Church is part of being religious. It always surprises me how little people know. For example, I read in a serious(!) publication once that the three wise men were called Ham, Shem and Japhet!!

You may as well say "I'm not Swedish so I don't need to know who the King of Sweden is". Who says I don't need to know when Ramadan starts or what Yom Kippur is?

Where would this end?

- "I don't have a garden so I don't need to learn the names of flowers"?
- "The children next door are not related to me so I don't have to know what their names are"?


Whoops - sorry. Rant over.

I wish your young ladies a successful and shining career in this sadly warped German school system. And more than anything, I wish them good teachers!

Now I'm reading that some of the German Laender are introducing the "start school at 5" idea.

Man I wish they'd done that here when #1 was 5. I've been saying for the last 20 years (since waaaaaay before I got that biological clock kick up the backside) that German kids start too late. Ho hum.

At the parents' evening the other day I was talking to some of the other mums, and I mentioned that my 3 year old niece just started pre-school - in a uniform. They were horrified, and I have to say that I am too.I'm glad the gruesomes didn't have to do that. On the whole I'm now resigned to the fact that a part of each of every weeknend and holiday day from now on is going to be taken up with me going over the 3 Rs with the gruesomes. Hopefully I can keep calm (Patience really isn't my middle name)