h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

This means nothing to you, and it certainly does not have a great dl to do with the ethics or aims of the Hitchiker's Guide, but I just have to vent myself a little ... I can always edit this off when I've cooled down.

So. Well, yes, I do fancy her. Of course I haven't told her, because there isn't a single reason - not a one - why she'd ever glance at me, and in any case, she already has a boyfriend. It's so stupid: I don't even fancy blondes. But, there you go. And people suspect - that's the scary thing - people suspect, and they're gonna end up telling her, and I really don't want her to find out.

I didn't want it to be like this. I did'nt want to end up liking her this much ... I didn't expect it. Bugger. It was her birthday today, and she looked beautiful, yearned over by a dozen and one men all better looking than me. She of course barely noticed me. Then her boyfriend turned up at the end of the night and took her home. Which was fun.

Nice story but if she has a boyfriend let her be and look around for the shy girl peeking at and wondering about you. Her name probably is Audrey. Tell her you wrote in the Guide that everybody needs to try a new food and would she like to try a new one with you. It will work.

And order a beer just in case it tastes like crap.

What a damn shame that the problem and solution were two years apart. And in any case, all beer tastes like crap to me.

I do know a girl who likes like Audrey, incidentally.