h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I have just taken my second Vioxx. I am only suppose to take one a day, but I took two yesterday and two the day before. Perhaps that's why I am feeling so sick.
Since I was 13 or so I have had headache attacks. I don't think its brain cancer. I just have a feeling that if it was, I would've been dead by now or something.
I have taken so many painkillers that the normal kind doesn't have any effect on my any more. I just eat them for comfort.
Gradually my headache has gotten worse. It sits on the left side of my face, the left temple, and half the forehead, the jaw and back down the left side of my neck.
Sometime during my late teenage it got so bad I started feeling nauseous when it came. Now nausea is the sign they are coming. And sometimes it just comes anyway.
Dark rooms are preferable. Light seems to hurt my eyes. Cold showers sometimes takes it away. I am not a cold shower person; I just hate it when it feels like someone is trying to rip the left side of my face off with a crowbar.
After so many years with headaches I eat any pill that comes my way. If it's within my reach I eat it. I know codeine makes me sick but I eat it anyway.
I have seen six different physical therapists. I guess it helps for a while. They had different theories, well at least some of them did, and the others accepted mine. I am pretty damn good at diagnosing myself and they seemed to deliriously accept whatever I said. This joint or that, this muscle or that, migraine, tension, grinding teeth, clenching yadda, yadda, yadda. Who the hell cares?
Some of them did make a valiant effort though, with acupuncture, deep tissue massages, neck cracking, iris diagnosis, exercises, little electrodes, ultra sound.
Sometimes I wonder if this headache is a part of my personality. Perhaps without it I am nothing. Perhaps without it I don't attach to reality anymore. Maybe that's why it won't go away.