h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I want everyone on h2g2 to know that appears that person has set about an organised attempt to bully me off this site.

She is well aware I'm confined to Journals today and can't post on general threads to defend myself.

She attacks me at every opportunity to the rest of h2g2.

Her friend repeatedly posts stuff to me and today to anhaga all about *me*.

It is making me ill.

Particularly today as I am unable to defend myself. That particularly disgusts me. I wouldn't behave in that way to anyone on this site.

And still she won't say why after 5 years of treating me one way..she suddenly says everything the opposite about me.

It seems like she wants nothing less than all out war now.

Okay.

There is absolutely no doubt in my mind what she wants now.

She *chose* today to launch that all out attack on me knowing full well I couldn't respond.

It would be enough to send the sanest person crazy.

Even in real life if you have a big fall out...one party isn't put under House Arrest..whislt the other goes out broadcasting and free as a bird.

Actually yes in the nastiest most repressive regimes that's the norm.

She will NOT get me off this site.

I'm more determined than ever now not to let her and her friend Peanut and..whoever else they can persuade to join in with the bullying get me off this place.

I couldn't be more upset than I am now about it..and still that makes me more determined.

If I have to CONFINE myself to Journals from now on..in order to stay here and express my FREE speech I shall.

I shall be as clever as her from now on and choose how to go about it as calculatingly as her.

I take it all back. I don't *feel* it. I can't be clever and calculating. That's horrible.

I'm not having my nature dictated to by someone elses's attitude.

She can feel what she wants. I feel what I feel..and it isn't some full on hate.

I don't understand it. And that's the whole truth. It's just so confusing.

I'm holding onto the truth of my feelings.

It was just so upsetting to read that stuff. That's other people's business and concern though.

**

This whole thing has got so ridiculous..just because we didn't talk it through. But I'm not going to bed tonight feeling like a liar talking about rubbish like clever calculation.

Maybe in the hereafter all will be resolved?

oh dear - I came to see how you are today.

Since you both can't resolve this over a cup of and clearly talking on or offsite doesn't work, you'll both have to work out the best way to be members here. It's not easy. But I do feel that if you feel someone is attacking you, whoever it is, and I know you have said before you don't like to do it - you will have to yikes posts where you see them.

I'm guessing that when you're confined to your journal you can't do that, which means you'll have to go back and see the posts again, but it's really the only way either of you can get a handle on it.

You know, like all awful things that happen this too really will pass but it will be the getting to the end of it that sucks as much as it blows.

Not much of a help, sorry.

I'm very pleased you've come to my space Sho. We probably are very different as people in many ways, but I have strong sense of your straightforwardness, honesty and clarity..and fundamental decency.

I'm entirely happy to talk to you, and feel safe. You are a very fair person I can tell.

Anyway enough of the compliments

You are welcome here whenever..and I want to slowly deal with this thing which is so complicated. When things are complicated often the most straightforwardness is the best way to deal with it.

(I don't want to be dealing with Peanut though...and hope she doesn't come here).

one day at a time seems pretty ok - I'm a fairly straight talker although I do try to be diplomatic.

How are things today?

Things today have been really good because I've been listening to a brilliantly witty, funny and clever play that anhaga recommended..plus listening to plenty of football and shopping.

**

With regards to that yikesing. I was too upset to even read half that stuff on the 'What is wrong with h2g2' thread.

I learnt that at the end of old h2g2 when SoRB hoped I'd die in car crash. That haunted me for ages.

Also in the last hour of h2g2 when I had the most incredible personal attack on my PS from someone called Venus, claiming to be a friend of Nick's. The mods had gone of course. Eventually it disappeared.

I've learnt my lesson. When I see personal attacks of a particular kind aimed at me..especially when the person knows I'm either on suspension or confined to my PS..I can't even bring myself to properly read.

The person will know this of course..and know I have to take it in, and then yikes..as SoRB well knew of course.

**

If I was running a site and someone was described as an 'Official Guru' and went about that on a general thread, when the person was powerless. The badge would be removed before you could say..'Jack Flash'.

I don't run this place though.and spend a lot of my time on some sort of punishment regime.

I hope that with the new h2g2 we are going to embark on a more user driven version of "moderation" where people call things when they see them rather than waiting for the person / people involved to see them and then yikes themselves.

I can't imagine how ... not sure of the word, frustrating isn't strong enough, of not being able to action things when you need / want to.

What I think would be good is, especially given the complaints I've seen about all the navel gazing etc that comes up on Ask, is for a few users to take the initiative and get some good conversations going, not rise to provocation and just generally get things going in the direction most of us seem to want them to go. And I'm not going to join in any more navel gazing as my small part of that.

Do you fancy joining in (when you're able?)

Maybe. I don't know.

I just couldn't believe going to ASK to see someone had started what could be something a bit funny and witty to do with which wire to cut when you defuse a bomb..and how it never seems to matter..

and the creativity of it blew me away when a usual suspect made a whole post to do with a typo in the subject title..

It feels pretty moribund really..and no doubt I'll soon be back on some other punishment routine or whatever..The emails I'm sent are beyond belief as a way to talk to an adult.

yes it's my aim to contribute.

In the past I talked about training to be a mediator. I now recognise that was probably a ridiculous idea..and it wasn't taken up.

I've talked a lot about journals in the past as a place people might feel free to play with writing.

I have to be careful. I DON'T want to be permanently on some punishment thing. Even at school I wasn't in that much trouble. My gang were clever not to get caught But even so I was always well liked by my teachers. But I want to break this pattern.

**

I'll always like kea because of how she was so nice when I first came here..I've talked about that. I accept that about myself..even if I'm angry about other stuff. that won't go away.

She has her feelings about me. That's her affair.

I hope we can find a way now to accept one another.

I don't want her to feel she can't be part of things here because of me. Same for me.

I know she reads stuff here. So hopefully she'll read this.

And if further problems occur I don't want Peanut involved in any way whatsoever. That's an absolute for me.

Closing this now absolutely.

I feel uncomfortable with the title and it feels a bit unpleasant. It was my way of dealing with the powerlessness I felt about the ASK thread and my situation..

If anyone wants to contact me at all about stuff I might do for h2g2..or begin to think about or any thing else please leave a message or post to another journal.

Off to my garden tent shortly..it's windy tonight.