h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Hi Jen

Just to let you know, I think it is looking very unlikely that I can make the party after all. It's a pity, as there are several people on the list I would have liked to have met, including your good self!

Anyway, good luck with it and hope everything works out for you all.

BK

Awh... really sorry to hear that. Was looking forward to meet the person who was willing to meet us on a rock on the Isle of Man with a flask O'Whisky and a warm towel...

TRY and make it. Pleaseeeeeee...

If not, I will personally drink a little in your honour and one for Serin and Andmymare and Rainbowmaker and Anneymouse and...

Well, I do intend taking loads of photographs (that is - ME taking them, (so as NOT to be in them, myself), so hopefully there'll be a few interesting ones to post up! lol!

Thanks BK.

Take care,

Jen

Flook

Bushkite - there's a big, scary fish from OZ in my folder!

H-E-L-P!!!

You may say that.

Omigod...Omigod...Fecking Hell... HHHHH-EEEEE-LLLLL-PPPPP!!!!




OK - Fun over. Me no scared of ye and your wee fishes, Mister!


How's ye doing, Brass?

Good, I see you're arranging a mega-party in Brum - good onya.

Well, we could always send ye a burger and a postcard, if ye want?

BTW, I'm watching the thread you started with interest. I've also joined the Unofficial GW MSM site and joined Writersdock yesterday. Haven't had a chance to really check them out though. Come March/April, think I'll probably filter away....

I was wondering if ANY of them were any good. The three I looked at were not.

As we speak I am writing a story. There's this bloke 'Muscle Boy' (it's true), anyway he is one of those guys who does shows in a small silver G-string as a surprise (you know the ones). Anyway, this girl throws herself at him and now SHE REFUSES TO GO THROUGH WITH IT - i.e. she has ruined my plan, she wants to be an individual. What can I do (auntie Jen).

Go through Muscle Boy's silver G-string? Are they too small for her? Tell me more...

The plot (laughs) is, he lives with mother and he is desperate to get away so he's working for extra cash. Anyway, this girl throws herself a him. Blah, blah, blah, can't take her home can he (is there a plot?). This girl is a foil she's supposed to be all over him BUT she's in the car and she has now decided that she doesn't want to be a shallow caricature (no shagging) She is also sobering up.

Should he kill her?

I think that would be the most humane thing don't you. Alternatively i could kill her (author). Can't kill him, I've invented 1000 words in him. Maybe I should have them towed up in a tractor beam to the planet Zarg (where they forget shagging).

Geezus, Brass! Lol. I do hope that this is NOT life writing!

So the girl is all 'tin' and no silver, eh? Mmmm... would he not just settle for a grope and a snog? Swap phone numbers and meet again for the following on up there?

Meat again - there, you see. This is a SHORT story. If they wait a week for the meat and 2 veg then that's another 1000 words. What about a car crash, or a hold-up or maybe he is in a coma and he wakes up in an episode of East Enders to find out that his mother has died.

No murder... yet.

The planet Zarg is promising. Tractor - no. Maybe a digger or a three wheeled bicycle withthe two seats. Have them wear helmets.

What's wrong with missy, then? She liked his thongs, wanted to get into them, then what?

Gawd! What time is it with ye? You on the juice? Lol

Coma... Eastenders... hold-up...Christ, canny think...
He's a stripper, right? He all man, then and not a Lady Boy? (I know, Mr Muscle...). Maybe 'she' a Lady Boy?

Look, this is 1st draft, right?

He backs out, CD player in hand, holding the smile, gently pushing the girls back as they follow him out in vain hope.

In the hall he picks up the rest of his clothing, towels down the oil and then makes for the door. Savanna is out at the car, waiting her eyes full of promise and alcohol, pupils dilated.

She wraps herself around him, passing her hand inside the buttons of his shirt and feeling the muscles on his chest.

‘Wanna take me for a ride?’

Rob’s still high on adrenalin from the show. Savanna’s a looker; long brown hair and athletic body, just as he likes them. He’s been warned this could happen but testosterone is a curious thing, maybe he’s not cut out for this profession. He feels the money, safely in his pocket and opens the car.

‘Sure, get in.’

They head uptown. Now she’s got him in the car Savanna’s come over all coy. The champagne’s wearing off. They’re heading up the I-70 freeway.

<<<< And then a tractor beam comes and takes them to the planet zarg >>>>>

Gotta have dinner - back after that (15 mins). Should he write her a poem?

OK - I haven't read the piece yet but will by the time you've taken the bib off.
As for the poem - I'll tell ye later...

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