h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

What do o mean your eunder constructon ?

Jen
x

Hi Jen

A couple of ladies with a feather duster and rubber gloves came in and said that I should do some tidying-up. I thought it best to delete the website that included a link to my email address...

How's everything with you?


Neil


X

Hi you.

I don't understand why you had to delete your e mail address. Unless you were getting a lot of wierdos writing to you ?

Things are fine with me. The lab lost half of my blood for testing purposes, but hey, I got dragged back today to give more.

The dentist has knitted a tank top on my gums and is taking out the stitches on Friday. But, then, I do like to have my own teeth.

Been swimming tonight with one of my friends. Then Buffs took me out to the pub to replace the calories I lost swimming 20 lengths.

It's my birthday on Monday. Gemini. Split personality

Sorry about the rubbish e mail last night. But I was very 'happy'. Helen was also on my receiving list.
Knew I'd sent 2 e mails. Assumed you were there.

Sorry. Jen,

xx

Your happy email made me laugh. Haven't seen so many spelling mistakes in one sentence since we invaded the Radio 1 site last year.

Blimey but you're a martyr to your gob ain't yer. I will be thinking of you tomorrow as you try to tork t' de' den'ist as 'e asks you where you are going for your holidays while his elbow is in your mouth.

I had an armfull drained off a couple of weeks ago as my doc said I had high blood pressure. You would have thought that with a bit more room I would be a bit more flaccid but sadly no and I'm now on pills for the BP. Back for more blood letting next week but my cholesterol and kidneys are OK. Thank God he didn't go for a liver test.

Val has writ out some recipes for quick but scrummy BBQ marinades should you be interested.

Neil

Dear M, B and D to know,

I am not a martyr to my gob. Cheeky. I have a lovely smile and intend to keep it for as long as I can !!

Are you on Atenelol for your BP ? Dread to think about the liver. My sister had to go for a liver scan not too long ago and she was very frightened. Not of the results, just the fact that someone might notice that it was addled through drink.

You might find that with high BP, your cholesterol level will rise and you'll be out of the Premiership league and into Div 3 before you know it.

Yours sincerely,

Job's comforter

PS Please say thank you to Val. Next time we plan a bbq, I will write to you beforehand. Last one was a nightmare. The memories still hurt.

How's the north and south? Have you managed to hide the bill from Buffy? Put it with the invoices from TopShop.

Ref BP I'm on something called Ramipril. Sounds like an evil warlord from Doctor Who.

Val had blood tests some time ago when she was having gall bladder problems (she is a Friday afternoon model) and they remarked on the level of G9 hormones in her liver. This apparently is an indicator of too much drink.

We often toast her liver with a 'here's to your gee-nines'.

Val is off to Germany on the 26th and I will go out the following Thursday. It is our second grand daughters first birthday on that weekend and we will be coming back with Ella on the Monday for her to have a holiday with us. I mentioned earlier that there is a 'farm' attraction (like the place near you) and we took her there a couple of times at the last visit. Claire has Sky in her house and she has it tuned to Wales BBC and ITV and there are adverts for this place called Folly Farm. When she sees it she gets very excited and says that she is going to go to Collie Warm there with 'gan and ganda' soon. She doesn't know yet that she is coming to stay with us as she has no conception of time: days and weeks mean nothing. She can get a bit obsessive...

I dream of third division. I have always been Vauxhall Conference.

Have a nice weekend and give your mouth a rest.

I wish I had mowed the backgarden last week when it was much shorter and dry.

Neil

Hello Neil,

Just a quickie (oops titter) loved your messages today. Aitch says to look out for last Fridays as well.

Lovely day today. What good friends I have;real and cyber.

Will reply to you properly shortly. The bottle of wine is interfering with my s[e;;;omg , oops, spelling and thought process.

Jen
X

Did I say I hpe Val has a safe journey.

Hi Neil,

My sister in law and husband are coming to stay with us next week, so looking forward to their company. Hope the weather improves as it's been really cold today.
Mowed the front and back grasses today. No grass really, just brown stubble. Can't be bothered to water all the blasted pots and hanging baskets tonight. It's really tiring. Our hose pipe is all stiff and the water keeps cutting out because of all the kinks.
I should have asked for a new one for my birthday. I remember some years ago Buffy bought me a garden fork and spade. When I told my female boss she said 'Oh, the bastard' Made me laugh.
Have a lovely time in Germany for the little one's first birthday. I read your posting on the JV board re your son in law. This country seems to have forgotten the Iraq crisis, involved as we are with the football and daft topics about Scotland v England blah blah... Tonight I saw the fracas which is Big Brother on Ch 4 News. What a nation we are becoming.
It must be lovely for you and Val to bring Ella back with you. You both must wish you lived closer to your daughter and grandchildre. I used to have my grandson staying every Friday night for almost 6 months. They were some of the happiest days of my life. He says he's coming to live with me when he's 18 in order to get away from his sister.
I am trying to cut down on the alcohol. It's a hard habit to break isn't it ? I used to smoke but stopped about 14 years ago. And now, I detest the smell of smoking. They say ex smokers are the least tolerant.
Whoops, just been to pour a glass of Merlot. I'll make it last as time's cracking on.

Safe journeys for all, Neil,

Regards,

Jen