h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

My claim to fame was that I once rented an office where the gun - that shot the dog - was tested.

Tom Mangold and the Panorama team turned up during the closing stages of the trial and filmed an interview who witnessed the event. The BBC gave me £20 for my trouble and Tom bought my ancient Royal typewriter for a fiver (he used one similar when he was a cub reporter)

Interesting footnote to history that.

Good evening.

Welcome. Are you also Dafty Corner aka Theresa and Feed a FGoat. ?

Sorry, very rude of me.

I have read some of your messages and you seem 'different'

J

Different?

How so, J Yo Yo?

For want of another couple of words, we'll try 'mellow' 'soft'. (And I don't mean soft as in daft !)

Please be aware that these personal adjectives do not apply to your message on JV this am !!


Anyway, it's probably just me. It's all the physic vibes on H2 I guess.

My postings have nothing to do with me - it's the voices in m'heed.

I am a mellow fellow really and the JV Board allows me to exorcise (and exercise) my Mr Angry of Tonbridge Wells. Then there's the metamorphosis to look forward to in April when I pass from young whippersnapper to middle age. Apparently it is like a butterfly that finds a quiet corner, forms into cocoon and out crawls a miserable wrinkly old git. Watch out for Mister Curmudgeon, my new valet.

I am trying to work out what this Board does. Are there chat rooms/message boards etc? I could never quite get the hang of the virtual drinking that went on in the Coffee Bar - and I couldn't get the peeps there to play.

Daisy has taken Ella to town to have her feet measured - apparently E. wants blue shoes. I gave D. a tenner (she could get two pairs for that I should think 'cos Ella has only small feet).

My German cold is much better thank you

PPII

Dear Skitz,

£10 will hardly pay for the cup of coffee and Danish.

I don't know what the point of this board is. Addresses, and, heavens to Betsy, real names have been swapped. It's bound to end in tears.

I joined H2 in a euphoria of excitement. (And because everybody else was.
I don't have the time to sort out me Smileys and I can't think of anything that would interest the world and his brother.

So glad your cold is improved. By heck the German strain is hard.

I look forward to meeting Mr C. But should warn you that Buffy has already laid claim to that title.

J

Ah ha found you two!

Had to laugh at getting 2 pairs for the tenner. No doubt you were expecting change as well!

Like you not sure what the purpose is apart from not getting modded!

Wish we could have a 'chat' thread on the JV board like we used to get away with.

Tell Pepe I'm off to post his personal copy of my new CD!

H

Am I asking two pairs for a tenner? No ma'am we are talking nicht, zilch, nowt, zippo!

Cook went with Daisy and Ella and could not resist buying a pair of shoes for her. Then Ella found a pink pair with hearts that flash as you walk along and of course she gets those as well. I think we have a Marcos in the making (a bit like her Gran).

D. has cupboards full of shoes. I have four pairs. One black, one brown, one brown (casual) and daps.

Couldn't believe the price tho'.

PP

Please don't mention the name Imelda as the other half frequently refers to me as that! He's a bit like you, probably like most of your species I guess. The 'flashing hearts' sound brill!

Have just messed up my page I think so don't even bother to look!

H

Spooky ! I am the Imelda of the Western World. Shoes, I love them. Oh and jackets as well. I never go out anywhere mind.

J

Don't you have slippers ? Buffy has indoor galoshers. How do you spell that ?

...and a pair of slippers.

My weakness I suppose is tools. I have two chain saws (one to cut down trees and one to take lumps out of me), hedge clippers (petrol and electric), jump on and fall off mower (I can feel your interest beginning to wain) etc etc.

It's a man thang.

Does Buffy's curl up at the end? I think D. got mine from the nearly new theatrical shop in town.

Abracadabrilly yours

P

Buffy is dead straight. No curls on him.

I think the word for his slippers could be espadrilles. (Fluffy tartan ones are not allowed in the house)

You three playing tag, I can see it all now in thousands of years time someone trying to fathom it all out!! The computer will probably do it all for them. Our DNA implicably planted in this made me so much. Best thread of the day. The comic andidote by the masters the day the refuges from R2 invaded H2g2.

Oooh must tell you Jen Yo Yo I have an invitation to start the good smiley headquarters quite an honour I thought apparently the Evil ones have headquarter's but not the good ones. I'm at a loss at to what do should I make a big announcement?!!!! I'm quivering in my boot's.

Still no news on the baby then? Do hope everything is ok?

Aitch all you have to do is start a thread on the Jeremy Vine page of 's creation and also click to subscribe to the forum you just click on the title in blue to go to the forum. You can unsubscribe to a forum or conversation at any time. You can't delete messages left for you though. They are there for all eternity! Tell me to shut up if I'm going on to much and telling you what you already know.

BD

Hi BDG

Not sure which page you mean. Corrie's page? I'm not catching on very fast.

*H*

Hi Aitch

Sorry not to have replied earlier been ing around. There are three mediums:

1. Messages left for you as an individual

2. Guide Entries are called forums you can start a discussion/thread off the entry so if you go to Jeremy's Page which is now a guide entry, that Corrie has created you can click to subscribe to this forum. The same applies with Comfort Corner. That means any new conversations around this entry automatically come to you. To start a new thread off just click on discuss this entry that way everyone who subscribes to that forum will get the message. Which is what PP has done here mainly because he homed in on the proclaimer of the message.

3. Journal entries these go to everyone who has you on their friends list so you need to know who has tagged you so to speak.

Hope this hasn't confused you more, any queries please feel free to ask I don't understand all the technical jargon though re setting up pages Corrie's the expert there. We are all learning here but it's fun though. Hope to catch you for a glass of soon.

BD

Hi BDG

No, please keep telling me anything and everything. I can never have too much information.

What do you mean, the good Smileys ? Whatever it is congratulations, but let's know what I'm congratulating you about please !!

Jen

You're all right with this Helen.
Trust me.

Been on R2 boards the last couple of days. Familiarity doesn't breed contempt with me. As my husband always says about his jokes, the old ones are the best !

J

Hi BDG

It's starting to make a bit more sense to me but it's very time consuming!

Thanks for all the help!

H