h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

All week theres been this cloud
As bright as it was out side
Its never felt darker

It was a cloud of knowledge
Knowledge of the fact that you
have to say good bye
A good bye that shouldnt have been this way
It should have come later

At graduation
As you wave at him as he walks in front of his peers
In a cap and gown
Knowing in

a few moments
youll give him the worlds biggest hug
and squeeze his nose once more
The way you love to do

A few moments
Youll be standing next to his red casket
It was gleaming and sweet
The way his smile always was

Surrounded by the cries of a mother
Who has just lost a son
Cries of a mother that just breaks the heart
and tourtures a soul
Brothers and sisters being embraced
By friends of their brother
Who now lays beneath the shiney red...

Place your hand on the red
Grab your friend standing with you
Through thousands of tears
Cry out
"Good Bye Andy
I love you."



Clutch the hand of the friend with you
And turn your back for the last time.



I miss you Andy.





"I Can Only Imagine"
Written by Kelsey Wyatt

What do you do when someone so young is taken from you? What do you act like when they weren't your best friend, but you still knew them enough to miss them? What can you say to those who loved him in everyway?



Wonderful beautiful imagination says you can reach out to them and make it right. Horrible honest truth says you can't do anything. It seems stupid that all you can say to someone is "I'm sorry", and yet… If given the chance, what would you say more?



Nothing seems right and everything is stupid. What do you feel when you're told they're gone? Is it emptiness or something much like nothing you know? What can you feel for those who knew him best? Something much like sorrow or another labeled guilt?



Nothing is answered and you seem to accept it until the service comes and you sit in a pew among people as sad, or more so than you. Bright reds around you do nothing to cheer, but you've held it together this long. You assume you'll be fine.



Then comes the time they read the announcement printed along side those older who died and a small quiet tear comes to the corner of your eye. But you've accepted it? And you'll be alright?



And you listen to the words by a man you don't know. Holding another's hand as you watch them let go. They play that song – and before it starts, you know… At the sound of the lyrics you realize you're not fine. You begin to cry.



You listen to those around you, sobbing in their grief and you silently cry into your sleeve. The song ends and you stiffen, awaiting what's next. The tears start to slow as up they come to share stories of good times and good health. Until you think you're okay again and the man you don't know stands up and addresses.



Oh Heavenly Father… he goes on to list what has happened to the boy lying up there and you find some comfort and then you find despair. The tears are all gone and you're angry at that man for saying things you believe are wrong.



Until he speaks of what will happen when your boy wakes. He tells you that the eyes will open and his savior will be standing there with open arms, receiving him into Heaven. And by the time he says the words our boy will hear, you've lost it again in a flood of tears.



Any words he says are now lost and after a while another song plays and you laugh through your tears because it's completely absurd. So you sit there in silence until someone asks you to come. And you've composed yourself and form a train.



You stand in a line that's more like a group, not sobbing anymore. But by the time you make it to him – you've lost it again and can barely see – as you leave a slight handprint among so many others in some desperate attempt to say goodbye or cling on to what you can.



Everything is a blur and you move away from him now, hugging everyone you know and some you don't know. Trying to press your sadness into another's, as if by close approximation you can make the grief solid and become close to someone again. When all it does it single you out, and make it the loneliest feeling in the world.



Because there is always one hug you want more than all those you receive, and you're unable to obtain it. So you walk out the door and the sunlight makes your tears stop – you compose yourself again and sit down on the ground to think for a while, before something else makes you stand.



By the time you've decided to leave, another voice is calling you back. It's one you used to be close to, but as of lately has grown away – one you know you'll come back to when they need you. And you're completely okay with yourself, until they hug you. Then you've lost it again; and you're sobbing into their shoulder.



Those words "Please don't ever leave me" make you shake with sadness and once again pressing grief upon another does nothing more but make you the loneliest figure in the world. So you leave, and you try to get it together, by going someplace you know is safe. Too many people surround you – and none of them seem to know.



The only thing you can do is press it into the corners of your life, and try to deal. Because you know that nothing will make it better. There is nothing you can say. There is nothing you can do. All the "I'm sorry"'s in the world will do nothing for you now. You know, that no matter what that boy is gone – and his smiling face won't grace you again.



You want nothing more in that moment of realization than to scream and stomp and curse anything and everything around you for this happening. Because in that moment, you're suddenly realizing that no one ever gets over things like this…



We all just learn to live with it.







_______________________________-

So- yeah...
Andy Lickly was torn away from us last Sunday in a terrible accident.
He was a really great friend. Im sure anyone on here would have LOVED him. He was always smiling. Even when he had his shoulder surgery he was cheery and up beat.

He is going to be sorely missed.




Rest In Peace Andrew Joseph Lickly. August 7th, 1989 - April 15th, 2007.

Hi Ford

I don't quite know why I came onto hootoo today - I haven't had time to be an active member for some years now and I don't even lurk as much as I used to these days. Somehow, though, I wandered on to your PS and I just thought I'd say that this journal entry was very moving for me at this point in time.

You have lost someone young, who is clearly a close firend, and almost at the same time I lost my "little" brother. He was not as young as your friend, but at 31 he had so much of his life ahead of him and so many things to live for. It was less than two years ago that I signed his marriage certificate on a beach in Sri Lanka (they didn't want a "traditional" wedding, so what better than a beach party!) and three weeks ago I signed his death certificate.

There isn't much that I can say to you, or that anyone can say at such a time, because when you lose someone with so much potential it will always seem terribly unfair. I certainly still feel sometimes that it's all a nightmare and I will wake up from it sobbing to discover that everything is OK after all.

I wrote this about my brother, who was quite genuinely the best man I have ever known. Just really posting it here because it's a similar situation to your friend - it hurts so much to think of everything that should have been, but you just have to remember all the great times that you had together and think that if it hadn't been so good, it wouldn't hurt so much to lose.

Ugi



A light, a flame, each person bears
To warm and cut the dark of night
And with each life whose fire one shares
Upon our paths we cast more light

The mean, the small, the cold of heart
Their torches burn but feably dim
While love of life marks a man apart
For such a flame is borne by him

Of all the men who's lights I've shared
Of all whose light has warmed my way
The one whose torch most bravely flared
Is he whose life we mark today

And all whose lives he's formed a part
Who've shared his fire, you know, like me
His selflessness, his loving heart
His friendship and his loyalty

But now that torch is all burned out
The privelege of that warmth withdrawn
And we must carry on without
As lost and shocked and cold we mourn

Although we've lost his balzing glow
And stumbled blinking into night
It's worth the dark for us to know
He burned so fast, but shone so bright.

Hey
thank you for posting that
its been only 2 months.... but it feels like forever
The poem is beautiful
The last line espicially sticks with me
because it is so true
in both situations
I am really sorry to hear about your "little" brother
he sounds like an adventurous fellow
sir lanka? only a certain kind of person would do that:
one in a zillion
I hope you and yours are coping well! I know its really hard
Andy's best friend isnt doing so well... its heart breaking.
But he took a lesson from Andy-
life is short
live it up
and boy is he!
i guess thats the best case senario...
I wish you luck with the healing
and thank you.
cheers
ford