h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

 today i went to a family get-together. you know where all your relatives get into one place and talk. i always end up talking to this person who i don't know but i have been told that he is my great uncle or some one. i find that after the hello's and my have't you grown's have been said, they get rather boring and you don't know what to do. i always resort to the food. little nibbles, smal sandwiches. i find that it helps you cope with all the shock of so many people who know you and you don't know who they are. the worst thing is that there are no girls to chat up. (any ones wich you wouldn't feel disgusted to chat up, anyway.) except if you don't know who they are, then you sort of chat them up a bit. later you find out that she's someone in your close family. (then you feel disgusted!)